I Hate Rachel Berry
by RedYellow11
Summary: "Rachel grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me in for a kiss. That had been about the last thing I'd been expecting. The only thing I'd expected less was the way my body reacted to having Rachel Berry pressed against me." Faberry, side Brittana.
1. Love

A/N: This is a new thing I'm working on. It'll be a multi-chapter fic, but updates may come slowly.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or anything else that may get me sued.

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I hate Rachel Berry.

I kept saying it to myself, over and over, trying to forget what happened. It was true. I hated her. She'd spilled the beans about the baby. She'd stolen Finn and, in some ways, Puck away from me. Everything that came out of her mouth was at best rude and at worst life-altering. She was a bitch and a home wrecker and I hated her.

Which was why I was confused...how could this have happened if I hated her?

It all started with Santana opening her stupid mouth about her and Finn sleeping together. Just because she was mad about...whatever didn't mean that she had a right to ruin everything like that. Not that I cared about Rachel's feelings or anything. I only cared because I felt like she was going to end up crying on my shoulder or something.

As it turned out, I was right. It was about a week after Finn and Rachel had officially broken up, and I walked into the choir room. I was supposed to be working on a new duet with Sam, but he'd decided that comforting Finn was more important. I didn't care. I figured I could work on my parts while he was having male bonding time.

I should've known that Rachel would be in the choir room. Now that she didn't have Finn, she didn't have anyone to sit with. What I didn't quite expect, though, was to see her shoulders shaking with sobs as she sat staring at the piano from its bench.

My first reaction was to make a rude comment and walk away. That seemed like the "me" thing to do. Another part of me just wanted to walk away without saying anything. It would be too awkward to acknowledge that I'd seen her. Still another part of me, the part I was desperately trying to ignore, was telling me to console her. I didn't understand why, but I found myself moving forward and placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Hey," I said, not sure exactly what to do next. Rachel furiously wiped at her eyes, trying to hide the fact that she'd been crying. It didn't really help, because there were still tears falling from her eyes.

"Oh, hey Quinn. I didn't hear you walk in. What're you doing here? Where's Sam?" She was still trembling a little.

"What, suddenly you care about Barbie and Ken?" I felt better regaining some of my control. That is, until I felt her flinch away from my hand.

"Quinn, if you came here to make fun of me, then I'm going to have to insist that you leave."

I scoffed. "You can't kick me out. I'm actually here to practice. You're just here to throw yourself a pity party."

Rachel stood up and got in my face. "You have no idea what I'm going through right now, Quinn."

I rolled my eyes, glad that we had dropped into our usual banter and I'd gotten over wanting to care for her. "You cheated on Finn with Puck and your telling me I don't know how you feel? I know _exactly_ how you feel, Rachel. The difference is you aren't going to have to carry a baby to term!"

She stepped right into my space, and I felt something weird in my stomach that I couldn't quite define.

"That was completely different. He didn't love you the way he loves me. You didn't love him the way I love him."

"Oh, is that why you took the first chance to jump into bed with Puck?"

Rachel fumbled for words. "I...I...I was hurting. I was scared."

"That doesn't make it okay. He didn't deserve that again."

"What do you even care?" she asked, fury burning in her eyes. But there was something else beneath it. Something that was just out of my reach. She kept talking before I could figure it out. "Do you want him back or something?"

I let out a mocking laugh. "Are you kidding me? I'm not talking Rachel Berry's left overs! Besides, I have Sam now, and with you and Finn out of the picture, we're going to be the new glee power couple."

"Oh, so that's why you're dating your twin brother!" she yelled at me, poking me in the chest.

"Oh my God! Just because we're both blondes doesn't mean that we look alike!" I yelled.

Rachel turned around and put a few steps of space between us before whipping back around to face me again. I missed her being close. I figured it was because I liked having her within striking distance.

"I really thought you would've grown after your pregnancy. I thought you'd understand what it's like to lose someone that's important to you. I thought that you would get what it feels like to have everything you want, yet still feel empty..."

By the way she drifted off, I knew that she'd let something slip that she hadn't meant to.

"What the hell does that mean?" I asked.

"That's not the point," she said. "The point is that while I thought the birth of your daughter would have forced you to grow beyond caring about trivial things such as achieving popularity, it has become glaringly obvious that your still stuck in a very immature high school state of mind!"

"No, Rachel. I'm not going to let you talk circles around me to try and change the subject." I felt like I was arguing for argument's sake. Nothing we were fighting about made sense. She knew I didn't want Finn, and she knew that I didn't care if she took shots at Sam. The only important thing either of us had said was the comment she made about feeling empty. And I needed to get to the bottom of that. "Why did you feel empty?"

She looked at the ground. "It didn't mean anything, Quinn."

"Bullshit!" I yelled, snapping her attention back to me, but a lot of the anger had drained from her face, replaced by...I didn't know what. I didn't like having all of these feelings between us that I couldn't describe. I wasn't used to being thrown like that; it just made me more angry than I already was. I advanced on her. "You know damn well that you were trying to tell me something. What was it?"

Rachel had never looked so small to me before. Yeah, I'd seen her cry before. She wasn't afraid to turn on the waterworks for a little drama, but I'd never seen her really break down before. I had to admit that seeing her like this when she was usually so strong and confident was a little jarring. It didn't sit well with me.

"You wouldn't get it, Quinn. You wouldn't understand. And besides, I don't trust you enough to tell you."

"Well, it's too late. I'm going to push this until I find out what you're trying to say. If I have to get Santana to beat your ass, I will. If I have to...if I have to..."

"Is that all you've got?" she asked.

I took a deep breath and thought. What would hurt Rachel more than anything?

"If I have to sleep with Finn, I will."

Her eyes went wide. "You wouldn't. He wouldn't let you...and you wouldn't hurt me like that."

"I would." I wouldn't. I meant it when I said I was done with him, but I knew that this was the only thing that may drive Rachel to action. If she didn't take my bluff, then I didn't have a back-up plan."

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes. When she opened them again, there were more tears.

"I love Finn," she stated, and I wanted to slap her across the face.

"Yeah, I'm aware of-" I started, but she cut me off.

"I'm not in love with Finn." I felt my jaw open and close unattractively. What the hell? Hadn't she been singing about her undying love for him since he'd joined glee club? "I'm in love with someone else, and I don't know how to deal with it."

"You're in love with Puckerman?" I asked. It seemed like the logical place to go, but when she shook her head in the negative, I didn't know who else to think of, and I didn't know why I cared so much. So what if Rachel loved someone? It didn't have anything to do with me.

Still, I found myself obsessed in that moment with finding out who it was.

"Who?" I asked her, trying to take all of the venom out of my voice, I went to grab her hand to reassure her, but she snatched it away. I don't know why I was surprised. Two seconds ago, we'd been screaming in each other's faces. Still, like everything else Rachel Berry did, that little action pissed me off.

"I don't want to tell you, Quinn. You don't want to hear."

Then I realized the one person that it had to be. Why else would she say something like that?

Rachel had fallen in love with Sam.

I shoved Rachel backwards, and she stumbled into the piano, bracing herself on it. I was in her face before she could blink.

"Listen up, RuPaul, because I'm only going to say this once. If you try anything, I swear to God I will personally ensure that your remaining years in this town will be more miserable than you could possibly fathom. I knew there was a reason I hated you."

"Qu-Quinn," she stuttered out. "I swear, I'm never going to do anything. Please, just step away, and we can forget this ever happened."

"Are you serious?" I yelled so loud I was afraid that someone might hear and intervene. "I understand you trying to steal my life away, considering yours is so pathetic, but after everything with Finn and Puck, I'll be damned if I let you steal another one of my boyfriends, no matter how much I do or don't care about him."

"What?" she asked, seeming genuinely confused. I guess she really was a great actor.

"You love Sam, right?"

She pushed me away a little bit, but I was still close. "No, I don't love Sam!" she spat.

"Then what the hell did you mean when you said I didn't wanna hear it?"

The next few moments went in slow motion. I saw a few emotions cross Rachel's face, but, just like the rest of this encounter, they didn't make any sense. And before I had time to finally connect the dots, Rachel grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me in for a kiss. I froze. That had been about the last thing I'd been expecting. The only thing I'd expected less was the way my body reacted to having Rachel Berry pressed against me. I felt a heat rise within me and a pool in between my legs.

It was then that everything started to make sense. All those looks that she'd been throwing me were looks of love and fear. Love that she obviously felt for me and fear that I would reject her and tell the whole school about her. What scared me, though, was that tight feeling in my stomach earlier and the urge I felt to be close to her. Had that come from me wanting her?

No, that couldn't be it. I wasn't gay, and I certainly wasn't gay for Rachel fucking Berry.

Still, there we were, kissing like our lives depended on it, clinging to each other like we were holding on for dear life. I'd never felt like this kissing anyone else, and it scared me, but in that moment, my mind was being completely overruled by my body, so before I knew what was happening, I had my thigh in between her legs, and I was kissing my way down her neck.

"Quinn!" I heard her gasp as I pushed into her and bit down on her pulse point. It would probably leave a mark, but that gave me a small sense of satisfaction that I had branded her. I tried to ignore that thought, because I really shouldn't have been enjoying this. I kept grinding against her, because whether this was a mistake or not, it felt so fucking good, and I couldn't find it in myself to stop.

"Quinn," I heard her say again, like she was trying to get my attention, but I just ran my had under her sweater and she gasped. "Fuck...Quinn...we can't do this here. Someone...someone could catch us."

"So?" I asked, running my hand under her bra and palmed her breast.

"What about...Sam?" she asked me, followed by a moan that almost made me come on the spot.

"No more words, Rachel," I managed to get out. I would've hesitated and heard her out if she'd given me any indication that she wanted me to stop, but the way she was riding my thigh gave me the clue to go on.

I lowered my hands to her hips and started pushing her harder into my leg. I may have had a hard time listening to anything she'd said, but I knew that she was right about one thing: someone could come in at any moment. I sure as hell wasn't going to stop, so I needed this to finish up faster.

"Oh God," I heard her say into my ear. "I'm so close. I don't think...I can be quiet."

I knew what she meant. I'd been trying to hold back moans of pleasure the entire time we'd been doing...whatever we were doing. I could feel my own orgasm building inside of me, so I pushed against her harder and faster, and when I heard her start whispering profanities in my ear, I lost it. I pulled her in to kiss me again. We swallowed each other's moans as our orgasms raced through us.

When my breathing returned to normal, and my body stopped shaking, I looked at Rachel, and was scared by how much love I saw in her eyes. Then she said it.

"I love you."

It ruined everything.

I backed up from her so fast I almost fell over. I could see the concern in her eyes, but I didn't care. What the hell had I just done? I'd just pushed Rachel Berry up against the piano in the glee room and made her come. I'd just made Rachel Berry come...and she loved me. This was not okay. This was the farthest thing away from okay.

"Quinn," she said, moving towards me. "Please calm down. You're scaring me."

I realized that I was hyperventilating and frantically trying to put as much distance between us as I could.

"Get the fuck away from me!" I screamed. "You're...you're a freak! What the hell did you do to me?"

More tears...more looks of hurt and fear. More confusion for both of us. I couldn't want her...she was everything I hated. She's loud, obnoxious, self-centered, a total boyfriend stealer...but God, when she was kissing me, it was like heaven. When we came together...no, I couldn't think about that. I had to focus on the hate, but she was making so hard with her hurt look and her fearful eyes.

"I didn't...you...Quinn, please don't do this..."

I couldn't take any more. I had to leave. But before I did, I needed to make sure she wouldn't follow.

"If you come near me again, I will tell everyone that you tried to take advantage of me, and I'll expose you for the dyke you are, get me?"

She nodded, and I ran from the choir room. How the heel had I let this happen? What had she done to me to make me enjoy that? I couldn't deal with this. I couldn't deal with Sam trying to figure out what was wrong with me, or Santana making stupid comments about pushing Artie down the stairs. There was something seriously wrong with me, and I couldn't tell any of them. I felt more helpless than I had when I was pregnant and hiding it from everyone.

I got in my car and drove home, hoping my mother wouldn't be home, so I could be free to cry myself to sleep, trying to forget everything...the kiss, the orgasm, the fact that I'd enjoyed it all so much, but mostly, the fact that my heart felt like it was breaking at the thought of how much I'd hurt Rachel. I finally fell asleep, whispering my mantra over and over again.

_I hate Rachel Berry. I hate Rachel Berry. I hate Rachel Berry..._


	2. Slushies

I wanted to skip school. I didn't think I could get through the day having to see Rachel, knowing what had happened. Hell, I could practically still feel her all over me. The only problem with my plan was the fact that I couldn't stop thinking about her. Her lips on mine, her smell, the little gasps and moans that she let out as she came...it was all too much. I needed a distraction from my own traitorous thoughts, and I hoped that school and Sam would be enough to get my mind off of things.

I got ready for school and I couldn't help but feel a burning on my back. Rachel had dug into me so hard yesterday that it left marks and still hurt...yet another reminder of what had happened. I tried to ignore the pain and the fact that it turned me on to feel it. I tried to focus on Sam, but that only brought on feelings of guilt that I'd once again cheated on a boyfriend. No, I couldn't think of it that way. What happened with Puck meant something...sort of. I had feelings for him...I think. What happened with Rachel didn't mean anything...it couldn't...because I wasn't gay.

I waited outside for Sam to come pick me up. Things were still tense between my mother and I after she didn't stand to my father. On top of that, I had my suspicions that she was trying to work things out with him. I'd caught her more than once on the phone begging for forgiveness. Whenever I'd ask her about it, she'd just tell me not to worry about it. I couldn't believe she'd still be so weak after everything.

I saw Sam pull into my driveway with a stupid smile on his face. I forced a smile in return, and got into the car. I was hoping the ride would be silent or he'd just talk about football or Finn or something, but that was wishful thinking.

"What was up with you yesterday? You just disappeared on me."

I sighed. "I was just feeling sort of sick. I needed to get out of there."

"What, were you throwing up or something?"

"Why does it matter?" I snapped. I could've just said yes, but I was sort of on edge, and the interrogation was driving me crazy. "Just drive, Sam."

"Quinn, I don't want you to be mad at me or anything, but is it your time of the month or something?"

I wanted to punch him. Were all guys as stupid as the ones I seemed to attract? I mean, Finn was dumb enough to buy that his sperm swam through a hot tub and impregnated me. Puck thought that "his guns" were the solution to every problem, and Sam assumed that every problem we had was because of my period.

_Rachel wouldn't ask me stupid ass questions like...wait, what the hell am I thinking? Rachel is gross. She practically molested me yesterday. I hate her. I hate her..._

I couldn't even respond to Sam's idiocy because I was so caught up in thoughts of Rachel, so he moved on.

"You aren't wearing your ring," he said. I looked down at my hand. I didn't usually wear it unless Sam was around, because I really hated it.

"I guess I forgot to put it back on this morning," I said.

"Why'd you take it off in the first place?" he asked. I sort of hated that Sam was using me for popularity. That ring was his way of marking me as his for the rest of the school to see. I'd almost refused to accept it, but I realized that while not very bright, Sam was a generally good guy, and I was using him for the same reason he was using me: appearances.

"I take it off when I sleep so I don't scratch my eyes out."

"Oh. Okay." I was glad that he was finally shutting up, because I didn't think I could take anymore of his rambling. We got to school, and Santana was waiting outside of her car.

"Where's Brittany?" I asked as I got out of the car.

"Probably off fucking her new boyfriend." She fell in step to the side of me, slightly behind Sam and I. She really wasn't adjusting well to being a minion again, and I couldn't blame her. Once you've had a taste of the top, it's hard to accept anything less, which was why I'd worked so hard to get my status back.

I walked down the halls, Sam's arm draped around me, and I couldn't help but feel like today wasn't going to be so bad. People practically coward as I walked by. It felt so good to know that I was feared and envied again.

Then, right on cue, Rachel had to go and ruin everything.

It wasn't anything that she did directly to me. It seemed like she was taking my threat to heart and purposely trying to keep her distance and avoid looking at me, but it was just the fact that she looked so...defeated.

"What's up with Stubbles?" Santana asked.

"I don't know," Sam chimed in. "She was a mess yesterday, too. Crying and shaking and the works. Probably just being a drama queen, y'know? Finn says she used to pull this stuff all the time when they were together."

I barely heard anything they were saying, because I was too busy staring at Rachel. Why couldn't I look away?

"You know what would cheer her up?" I found myself saying. Santana and Sam looked at me. "Slushie facial." Santana smiled and Sam looked confused.

"Wait, I thought you stopped doing that," he said. "At least to the other kids in glee."

I kept my eyes on Rachel. I needed something to get me to stop staring at her. It was harder for me to see her as a social pariah when I couldn't stop thinking about how beautiful she was, even when she was sad. I figured seeing her face covered in corn syrup was just the way to make me remember Rachel as she truly was: a freak. I saw Santana push some buttons on her phone, and I knew she was texting Karofsky.

"Oh, I won't slushie anyone else in the club. Just her...only her." I still couldn't stop staring as I saw Karofsky walk towards her, slushie in hand. She was so busy trying to keep her eyes off me that she didn't even see it coming.

"Hey loser!" Karofsky called, and Rachel turned to face him.

The flavor of the day: cherry.

When it hit her face, I could see the shock etched across her features. She hadn't been slushied since she and Finn had been dating. The hallway was silent; everyone assumed that Rachel was off-limits now that all of the school's royalty was in glee club with her, so they didn't quite know how to react. It wasn't until Santana started laughing next to me that everyone else joined in.

I tried to laugh along with everyone else, tried to join in on the torture of the girl I hated most in the world, but every time I tried to force a laugh, I could feel a sob start to come up instead. It took everything inside of me to stop myself from going over and wiping the slushie off her face, and the tears I could see forming in her eyes as she looked at me with a face that said, "How could you?"

Rachel ran to the bathroom, and before I could stop myself, I started following her. I felt Santana grab my arm.

"What the hell are you doing, Fabray?" she asked. "You order a slushie attack, and then you chase after her?"

I snatched my arm away. "What's it to you?"

"Quinn, it is a little weird," Sam said. "I mean, you don't even like her. In fact, you're sort of obsessed with hating her."

"You know what? You guys really need to mind your own damn business. I'm the head bitch in charge, and I do whatever I damn well please!" With that, I was back to chasing after Rachel. When I walked into the bathroom, she was staring at herself in the mirror and sobbing, not even attempting to wipe the slushie off her face or out of her hair. She didn't notice I was there until I made my presence known.

"Hey," I said. I felt like I was replaying everything that happened in the choir room the day before, but this time, she was crying because of me. In hindsight, she was probably crying about me that day in the choir room, too.

Rachel looked at me in the mirror, first flashing me a look of hurt, then of anger. She grabbed a towel out of her bag, quickly wiped her face off, and walked towards me. I hadn't expected her to reach me so quickly, nor had I expected the slap that she delivered with more strength than someone her size should have.

"You have done some horrible things to me, Quinn Fabray, but I never thought you were capable of this. I was more than willing to let you pretend like nothing happened yesterday. I was willing to watch you parade that charade of a relationship you have with Sam in front of my face. Hell, I was even willing to avoid looking at you speaking to you until I could get out of this stupid town, but I never, and I mean _never _thought you would sink this low."

I was still clutching my cheek in shock, but it didn't really feel it. I couldn't really feel anything but her breath on my face. She was standing so close. I felt like I was drowning in her, just like I had before...

"I thought you were just shocked and afraid after what happened yesterday. I figured that's why you said the vile things you did, but now...I should've known this would happen."

She stopped talking, and I was afraid that she might hit me again, because she wasn't backing up.

"Rachel, I-I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? You have the nerve to say that to me after-"

I cut her off with a kiss. I'd intended it to be a quick thing...a way to shut her up and regain the control in this...relationship? Rivalry? I didn't know why I thought I'd be able to pull away. I'd half expected her to push me away, but she just pushed me back against the wall and pinned me there. The kiss was passionate and urgent, and I felt like I could keep kissing Rachel forever.

But before it could get any farther, Rachel pulled back, shock on her face.

"Fuck!" she yelled. "How do I keep letting you do this to me?" Rachel ran out of the bathroom, cherry slushie still on her clothes and in her hair. I felt myself sink down the wall onto the floor. How could I have let myself do this again? This was so wrong...it was sick and sinful and fucked up in about a million different ways. This had to stop, I just didn't know what to do.

I stood up and walked out of the bathroom to my first period, a class I had with Rachel and Sam. I sat next to him. I could feel her staring at me, so I grabbed him and kissed him hard, earning looks from more than one of my classmates. I looked back at her, and she looked at anything else. Still, I couldn't ignore the tear that slid down her cheek, and that feeling in my chest that felt a hell of a lot like heartbreak.


	3. Distractions

A/N: I have never had reactions for a story like I have for this one. I really, REALLY appreciate all of the reviews. It keeps me writing.

This chapter's on the shorter side, so sorry about that. Hopefully, I'll keep the quick updates up. Enjoy and continue to R&R.

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It'd been a week since Rachel had turned my world upside down with her confession of love. I wanted to convince myself that what happened in the bathroom was the last time that I would ever kiss Rachel...the last time I would ever even think of her that way. I hated her. I _needed_ to hate her, because it had been the only thing that hadn't changed in my life. I'd been at the top and bottom of the social ladder, lived in four different houses, had my body and mind completely changed during the pregnancy...my life had gone through so many changes, and although I had pretty much regained all of my social status and my body was back to the way it was, it was nice to have that constant element in my life.

Rachel was doing a good job of avoiding me. I'd occasionally feel her eyes on me while we were sitting in class, but that was about the extent of our interaction. I'd been throwing myself at Sam as of late, trying to get Rachel off of my mind. I was getting more and more aggressive, and we kept going a little bit further every time. Nothing serious, just the grinding was a little more passionate, or at least, we moved harder against each other. I wouldn't really call anything I did with Sam passionate. I'd let him get under my shirt a few times, but I wouldn't let myself go any farther than that...until one day at my house while my mother was gone.

We'd been watching some movie...I very rarely paid any attention to the movies Sam liked because they were always mindless special-effects disaster movies. I actually tried to focus on the plot, only to find there really wasn't one, so my mind started to wander. Before I knew it, I was thinking about Rachel. I'd replayed our two encounters over and over again in my mind, and I couldn't seem to stop. I was starting to feel like Finn in the sense that I had to think about dead puppies or hit-and-runs just to get through the day without touching myself. Even then, I usually failed.

"Quinn," I heard Sam say somewhere in the distance. I mean, he was right next to me on the couch, but I was so caught up in my thoughts, it was hard to hear anything other than my memories of Rachel panting in my ear. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, why?" I asked.

"You're sort of breathing heavy. Is the movie getting to you?" He looked at me, flashing one of his dopey lopsided smiles at me. I leaned forward and kissed him, pushing him back on the couch so I was laying on top of him. I pulled back, and he looked at me a little confused.

"I'm just really turned on sitting next to you for so long." Lie. Rachel Berry had me all hot and bothered, and Sam was getting the benefits.

"Oh, okay then." He pulled me in for another kiss, this one a lot faster and sloppier than the one before. I tried to get lost in the kiss. Sam wasn't a bad kisser, considering my make-out sessions with Finn always ended with both of us yelling mailman until he cooled off, and Puck only kissed me for a few seconds before he was trying to get into my pants. Sam was at least caring when he kissed me, although I sort of felt like I needed to wash the saliva off my face after we were done. It didn't really matter. I wasn't too fond of making out anyway.

Except that wasn't true, either. I'd thought I didn't like making out, but Rachel had changed that, too. I started thinking about her again, getting lost in my thoughts, and suddenly, it wasn't Sam clumsily grabbing my ass, it was Rachel gently caressing me. I was so lost in fantasy that I was actually enjoying this. I started grabbing at a shirt and trying to rip it off, not so successfully, because I was still on top. I didn't even stop the hand that went under my shirt and unhooked my bra. I pulled back, kissing my way down until I hit the pulse point.

"Quinn..."

"Rachel..." Her name came out of my mouth before I could stop it. I was snapped back into reality when Sam pushed me back and looked me in the eye.

"Rachel?" he asked. "What the hell?"

"Um...just forget it," I said, trying to get back to kissing him, but he pushed me back again.

"Dude, you just said Rachel. I can't exactly just move past that."

I got up frustrated. "Ugh! If you're gonna be like this, just leave! I don't wanna deal with this right now!"

"Are you seriously telling me to leave because I won't put out? You just said someone else's name! Rachel's name! That's just weird!" He got quiet, getting this look of understanding on his face. Had he really figured it out? He was smarter than I gave him credit for.

"Look, Sam, I can explain-"

"Don't worry, Quinn. It isn't that big of a deal. I just thought we weren't doing that."

"Wait...what?" What the hell was he talking about?

"Well, after everything that happened with Coach, I thought we all agreed not to use other people to turn ourselves off. We sang a song about it and everything." I rolled my eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. Of course he hadn't figured anything out. "Although, I guess you aren't too concerned about Rachel's feelings or anything, but-"

"Sam, stop talking." I walked back to the couch. "Let's just finish the movie.

"Well, we could just keep going. Now that I know what was going on, I'm not as freaked out."

"Yeah, well, I am." I was more freaked out than he could ever know.

The next day went like the rest of the week had. Sam took me to school, and Santana met us in the parking lot. I knew she wasn't happy with me and probably wanted to spend her time with just about anyone else, but Brittany was always with Artie, and I was just about the only other person that could deal with all of her crap. Besides, after a while, I knew we'd have our sort-of friendship back. We always ended up basically getting along after big blow-outs. If we were able to get through the pregnancy drama, we'd be able to get through this.

I walked through the halls, head held high, feeling good when I saw everyone clear out of my path, and then I saw Rachel by her locker, getting books or whatever, and I made a point to look away when I saw someone walking towards her with a slushie. I couldn't take seeing the hurt in her eyes anymore. Hurt that I put there. I just heard the splash, the laughter, and her steps walking towards the bathroom. I had to blink back the tears.

"Okay, seriously, what the hell is wrong with you," Santana said next to me as I stared at my locker. "You've been in a mood for a while, now."

"Don't ask, Santana," Sam said. "I've been trying to figure it out, and she isn't spilling. I think it has something to do with Rachel, though."

"Sam, shut it." I didn't like where this was going.

"Manhands? What's this got to do with her?"

"I don't know, but she said her name yesterday while we were-"

"Sam!" I yelled, trying desperately to get him to stop. Sam may have been clueless, but Santana wasn't.

"What? She said Berry's name while you were what?" I gave Sam a death glare, and he finally realized that it would be detrimental to his health to open his mouth. "What am I missing here?"

"Nothing, San." Damn it, I shouldn't have said that. I only called her that when something was up or when I was feeling vulnerable...or both. "Sam's just being introduced to my bad side, and he doesn't know how to handle it."

Santana laughed. "Really? You think you have a bad side? You're so vanilla it hurts."

I caught sight of Rachel out of the corner of my eye, and I made the mistake of looking over at her. Of course, she was looking back at me, and my breath caught in my throat.

_How have I not noticed how beautiful she is? How did I not see that she loves me?_

"Oh my God," I heard from next to me, and before I knew it, I was being dragged away into the nearest empty bathroom. Santana checked all of the stalls before turning and facing me.

"When were you going to tell me that you're into Rachel Berry?"


	4. Cracks

A/N: I really love winter break. It gives me time to think about stuff outside of politics and music. I hope to keep the frequent updates up. And again, thank you for all the feedback. Enjoy!

* * *

Santana Lopez wasn't an idiot like most of the people I associated with. Sure, she wasn't a straight A student, and she'd play dumb for the benefit of guys or to make Brittany not feel so slow, but she definitely wasn't stupid, which is why I shouldn't have been surprised that she'd figured everything out. Whether I liked it or not, Santana knew me really well, and without Brittany to distract her, she was a lot more perceptive. I stood there, staring at her. She had her arms crossed over her chest and her foot was impatiently tapping on the floor, but I didn't want to say anything.

"Well?" she finally said, clearly frustrated with the silence.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said, and she rolled her eyes.

"Cut the crap, Quinn. I didn't miss your little eye-fucking display out there. So spill."

"Why should I tell you anything?I don't owe you."

She laughed. "Actually, I'd say since I didn't properly lay your ass out after you told Sylvester about my boob job, you owe me quite a bit."

"Oh shut up, Santana! You couldn't take me if you tried!"

She stepped up into my face. "Oh, you sure about that?"

I hated to admit it, but Santana did scare me a little bit. I could be a cold-hearted bitch, but I was all head-games and embarrassment. Santana, on the other hand, had no problems whatsoever with beating people into compliance. I had the height advantage, and strength wise, I was convinced we were pretty even since we both had the same cheerleading training, but she had years of experience and crazy on her side.

"I...I...please don't tell anyone, San." As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted them. Santana got this satisfied smile on her face.

"I knew it. God, Quinn, exactly how messed up are you? First teenage pregnancy, now lesbianism? You're really going to hell now." She really knew how to hit a nerve, didn't she? Unfortunately she didn't stop there. "I could ruin you, y'know? I could put you back on the bottom of the pyramid. Better yet, I could probably get enough girls freaked out that you'd get thrown off the team. And what's Sam gonna think when he finds out?"

"Whatever, I'd just tell everyone about you and Brittany." She scowled at me.

"First of all, don't bring Brittany into this. She didn't do anything to you. Second, that's totally different. We do what we do to get guys to want us."

I laughed. "Are you serious? Kissing at parties I get, threesomes I get, but screwing each other in private is NOT to get guys attention." She was fuming, and I felt a little bad, but it had gotten the attention off of me. "Well, I guess you two aren't screwing now that she's getting it from Artie."

"Shut the fuck up!" she yelled.

"Oh, did I hit a sensitive spot? Don't like seeing your girl getting treated well?"

"Oh, you're one to talk! When Berry was hurting, did she go running to you? No, she went off and tried to fuck Puckerman. She doesn't care about you!"

"Oh well then why did she kiss me?" I really hated my mouth sometimes.

Santana looked at me, shocked. "No way. No fucking way did you two actually hook up. Did you sleep with her?"

"No! We just...ugh, this is none of you business!"

"Q, you can tell me, or I can tell everyone else."

"What's to say you won't tell everyone anyways?" This whole encounter hadn't gone exactly as I'd expected. It almost felt...nice getting this out. It would've been better if it was just about anyone else, but I kind of felt like Santana could understand it all better, considering she had all of her Brittany issues. That didn't mean I trusted her, though.

"Oh, I'm not saying I won't air out your dirty laundry and enjoy seeing you fall, but at least you have a chance of me keeping my mouth shut if you tell me all the juicy details."

"Why do you even want to know?" I asked.

"Look around, Quinn. Now that Brittany's rolling off into the sunset, you're my only friend." I was confused. Was she opening up to me? Was Santana Lopez showing emotion? Right before I went to speak, she held her hand up. "Don't get all emotional, Fabray. It's not like I'm gonna start hugging you and crying."

I took a deep breath, deciding that deflecting wasn't working anymore.

"It started about a week ago. Rachel and I ended up...together in the choir room."

"So you did sleep with her. Never took Berry as one to give it up that easily."

"No, we didn't get that far. We just made out." I needed to keep some information to myself. "Then, that day I got her slushied and I followed her into the bathroom, we kissed again. That's about it."

"That's it?" I nodded. "Wow, that was really disappointing."

"She told me she loves me," I said. "She told me she loved me, and I started a slushie war. What the hell is wrong with me?" I could feel the tears falling down my face, and I hated myself for showing so much weakness, for being cruel to Rachel, for admitting to myself that I felt badly about being cruel to Rachel. It was all too much.

"Q...don't...don't cry," Santana said, walking towards me. "I...I don't know what to do." She patted my shoulder, and I would have laughed if I wasn't so devastated. She started to walk away. "Look, I'll back off of this...for now. Just know, if you breath a word about me and Brittany, your sexcapades with Manhands is public domain, got me?"

I nodded, unable to really speak. This was getting messy. I could somewhat convince myself that Rachel had basically taken advantage of me. I mean, she'd started everything. She was the one that was in love with me, not the other way around. Now that Santana knew, though, everything became more real. It was harder for me to ignore all of the feelings I suddenly felt for Rachel. Then again, was it really all that sudden? There is a fine line between love and hate...

_No, that's not possible. She loves me, and I'm going crazy, that's all._

Glee rehearsal that day was awkward. Sam and I were getting a lecture from Mr. Schue because we hadn't worked on the solo we were supposed to have at Regionals. The club was in a funk, mostly because Rachel was in a funk, and as much as everyone hated that she was such a diva, she was the heart of the club. Santana alternated between winking at me every time she caught me staring at Rachel (which, oddly, made me smile a little), and staring holes into the back of Artie's head. The part that bothered me most, though, was that Finn was staring at Rachel. I know I didn't have any right to be jealous, because Rachel wasn't mine, and besides, she didn't want him...right?

After glee practice, I hung around, hoping Rachel would do the same. I wasn't disappointed.

"You've been uncharacteristically quiet lately," I said, trying to break the tension.

"Yeah, well, nothing like being humiliated to put you in your place."

"You've always been humiliated, Rachel."

She snapped her head to meet my eyes. "Not like this. Not _ever_ like this."

I looked at the ground. I couldn't take looking her in the eyes anymore. "I didn't mean for this to turn into a fight."

"Isn't that all we do, Quinn. That is, when you're not humping me up against the piano." I blushed, not expecting her to be so blunt. "There's obviously a reason you stayed behind, so say what you have to say, or leave me alone, because I have a few songs I need to work on to present to Mr. Schuester before Regionals."

"I just...I wanted to let you know that Santana knows...about what happened."

"What?" I heard the fear in her voice. "Why would you do that?"

"I-I didn't do anything. She figured it out on her own. I just filled her in on some of the details." I heard footsteps and when I looked up, Rachel was right in my face.

_This never ends well..._

"Why? Y'know, I have half a mind to slap you again!"

"Please don't..." I was speaking barely above a whisper. "She said if I didn't tell her everything, she was going to tell everyone about us."

"There is no us, Quinn!" I hadn't expected that to hurt so much. I was sort of wishing she'd just slapped me. "What exactly did you tell her?"

"That we kissed...and that you love me...that's it."

"That's it?" I'd never seen Rachel this mad. Even in the bathroom she hadn't been this keyed up. I felt a little scared...and more than a little turned on, but I tried to push that feeling back in my mind. "You just told her my biggest secret! Thanks a lot, Quinn. I feel so much better now!"

"Rachel, there wasn't anything else I could do."

"Yes there was! You could've denied everything!"

"I tried, but she knew! She's like, psychic or something!"

"Quinn, stop!" she yelled at me. "Just...stop. All we can do at this point is hope that Santana doesn't tell everyone."

"Why do you care so much?" I asked. "Would you even care if everyone knew about you? You've always been pretty open about how you feel."

Rachel just shook her head. "Y'know what? I don't feel much like singing right now." She went to walk past me, and I grabbed her arm. Our eyes locked again, and I felt like I was getting lost in hers.

"I'm sorry...about everything." I felt us moving closer to each other until I could feel her breath on my lips. "You really are beautiful, Rachel." Right before I closed the distance, she pulled away.

"I can't. I can't do this again. It hurts too much when I see you with him like nothing happened between us." Rachel walked to the door, but before she walked out, she looked back at me. "I'm not keeping this hidden for myself, I'm keeping it hidden for you."

With that, she walked out the door. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I let the sobs shake my entire being, I sank to the floor and cried until I couldn't breathe. I didn't understand anything. A week ago, I didn't think I'd ever be able to occupy a room with Rachel Berry without wanting to punch her in the mouth. Now all I wanted to do was kiss her tears away and hold her until she knew I would never leave her. I tried to feel that hate that I was so sure of such a short time ago, but it was gone, replaced by something I didn't dare identify.

I walked home that day. Sam offered me a ride, but I turned him down. I couldn't face him. I didn't feel like I could face anyone, and as I looked down at my finger, I noticed I hadn't taken his stupid ring off. I'd been tempted to take it off and throw it as far as I could, but Sam didn't deserve that, so I just took it off and put it in my backpack.

I felt stuck...trapped in my own life for the second time in less than a year. When I got home, I went straight to my room, ignoring my mother's half-hearted curiosity and questions about my day. I stared at myself in the mirror, trying to find the person that I was before my life had changed. Before Rachel, before the baby, before the glee club...the cold-hearted bitch that was all about the teasing and not about the pleasing. The captain of the Cheerios and president of the celibacy club that no one besides Santana Lopez dared to cross.

Had I really changed that much? Had I really abandoned that whole persona? Let's be honest; it wasn't who I really was when you pulled back all the layers, but I'd been so good at projecting that image that I could occasionally convince myself that I was really that way. That I really was untouchable. I guess I'd learned that from my father, but I hadn't perfected the skill like he had. The cracks were showing, and although I'd become captain again and I had a nice piece of arm candy, there was one crack in my mask that refused to be ignored.

And its name was Rachel Berry.


	5. Friends

A/N: Finished my last final today (thank God), so I should be able to keep the updates coming as long as I can keep thinking stuff up for this story. Enjoy!

* * *

I hated it when I cried myself to sleep, especially when it was for an entire weekend. I'd always wake up with a headache and puffy eyes that I couldn't quite cover up, and someone would always ask me what was wrong. Sometimes it was Sam, which didn't help, because he never had anything helpful to say. Sometimes it was Santana, and it was usually followed with, "Wait, I don't care." Then, on occasion, it was Rachel, which probably wasn't going to happen after our little exchange in the choir room the Friday before. Which was a blessing and a curse; it was nice not having to worry about having Rachel close to me, but she was usually the only one who could make me feel better...the only one that seemed to understand me, even though we barely knew each other.

I took a shower (a cold shower, considering the dreams I'd had about Rachel that night), and got ready for school, considering for what seemed like the hundredth time since this all started if I should just skip. I figured being out would be better, but that always went to shit as soon as I saw Rachel. I heard a honk outside, and I went down the stairs.

"'Bye, Mom," I said as I passed her by."

"Quinnie," she said before I got out the door. "Could you wait a second? I think we need to talk."

I sat down next to her and dreaded what was to come. Whenever she needed to talk to me (besides the time at Regionals), it was about something bad.

"What's up?" I asked, trying to keep the anxiety out of my voice.

"Quinn...Quinn, you know I love you very much, right?" Yeah, this wasn't going to be good.

"Yeah, Mom, I know." I couldn't find it in myself to say it back. I did love her, but I wasn't really one for saying it out loud. "What's this about?"

"You know I'd never do anything to intentionally hurt you, right?"

"Mom, will you just tell me what's going on?" I couldn't take the suspense anymore.

"Honey...I've...I don't know how to say this..." She took a deep breath and fixed her gaze back on me. "Your father and I have worked things out. It's still early in our reconciliation, but I'll be asking him to move back in soon."

I felt like the air had been knocked out of my lungs. "What? Why? How could you...how could you take him back after what he did to you...what he did to me?"

"Sweetie, people make mistakes, and it's our job to forgive them. You should know that better than anyone."

I felt my mouth drop open. Was she really going to compare my past mistakes with his?

"You know that isn't the same! He threw me out! He cheated on you!"

"You cheated on Finn, got pregnant, and convinced him that the baby was his. How is what your father did any worse?"

That got me seeing red. "I wasn't married to Finn! I didn't throw my child out in the cold without anywhere to go!"

"Quinn, I can understand why you're upset, but your father is a good man, and he can take care of us and keep us in the lifestyle we're used to."

"Is that what this is about? Our lifestyle? Keeping up appearances? Seriously, I'd rather live in a cardboard box than have that man in my life again!"

"Don't talk about your father that way," she said.

"That man is NOT my father! God, I can't even deal with you right now!" I grabbed my bag and ignored my mother's calls as I walked out the door and into Sam's car.

"What took so long?" he asked.

"Just drive, Sam." He took the hint for once and didn't say a word to me the entire ride. When we got to the parking lot, I got out of the car and walked straight by Santana without a word.

"Hey!" She jogged up to me. "What's up?"

"Nothing," I said, still walking.

"Come on, there's something."

I spun around to face her. "Why are you even asking? You don't care."

"Y'know what? Whatever! That just shows me to actually be concerned about you for once." She walked off, and Sam followed her, probably trying to calm her down and get her to help me out, because he knew he wasn't good with the emotional stuff. It was better this way. I didn't want anyone around me right now.

It wasn't until I got to my locker that I realized that my hands were shaking. Did this really have me that freaked out? I mean, he's just a man...but he wasn't really. He was my father, no matter how much I wished he wasn't, and for my entire life before the pregnancy, I'd put him on this pedestal in my mind. He was strong and intelligent and a righteous, destined for eternal happiness in heaven. He'd basically been a God among men in my eyes for so long, and I'd aspired to be just like him.

That's what made me hate myself more when he'd turned his back on me and I'd felt that disappointment. Disappointment in myself at first. My idol had found me painfully inadequate in the end. Then, as time went on, the disappointment spread to my father, who I ultimately realized was nothing more than a judgmental prick who couldn't even have enough compassion to see what I was going through. My life came crashing down...and right when I seemed to be getting everything back, here he was, snatching everything away.

Well, to be fair, he wasn't the only one that was screwing up everything this time.

I felt a tear roll down my cheek, so I shoved everything back in my locker and walked to the bathroom. I wouldn't let the student body see me break down. I walked to the sink and threw some water in my face, trying to reel in my emotions so I could go to class...the class I had with Rachel and Sam.

"Fuck my life," I said under my breath.

"Quinn?" I heard a voice come from one of the stalls. I thought I was hearing things until the person walked out.

Of course. I'd even gone to a different bathroom hoping not to run into her, but she was there anyway.

"Don't you usually go to the other bathroom?" I said, harsher than I meant to.

"I was hoping that changing my routine would help me avoid a slushie in the face. I figured it would at least it would buy me some time." She looked at me with concern on her face. "What's wrong?"

"Why are you talking to me?" I asked. "I figured we would be done talking by now."

She looked at the ground. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean...I'll just go." She started to leave.

"Rachel, wait," I said, and she stopped and turned to face me. "Don't be sorry. I'm sorry, I just had a rough morning."

"Care to share?" She smiled at me, and I giggled at her stupid little rhyme. "Contrary to popular belief, I can actually be a very good listener, and I've been known to give valuable advice."

I shook my head and giggled a little more. "You say so many words. Isn't it exhausting?"

"It can be, but I feel that I need a lot of words to effectively convey my point."

"I think you'd find a lot of people who disagree. Brittany, for one, can't understand a thing you say."

She laughed and stepped closer to me. "Seriously, Quinn, what's wrong? Is it...is it about me? I'm sorry if it is."

"No, it's not about you." Entirely. I left that out because she really didn't deserve to feel bad. After everything I'd done to her, she was still talking to me. Still making me smile on the days I didn't think it was possible. "It's just..." I tried to keep the tears from falling, but I knew it was a losing battle. I felt them rolling down my cheeks. "My mom is letting my dad move back in."

"What?" She had this look of disbelief on her face. "Why would she do that?"

"I guess they've been working things out." I wasn't sure Rachel could even understand me through all of my sobs. "I never thought I'd have to be under his rule again. I don't think I can be. Not after what he did. What's to say he won't find something else wrong with me and throw me out again?"

Rachel moved forward and pulled me into a hug. God, it felt good to be in her arms. I'd never found hugs very calming. They could be comforting and reassuring at times, but they were usually a little awkward and forced, so they tensed me up. Rachel's hugs, though, were magical, much like her kisses.

"Shhh," she says, rubbing small circles on my back and ricking me gently. "It's going to be okay. You have people that really care about you that will be there for you if anything happens. You have Santana and Puck...you have Sam."

I could hear the pain in her voice as she said his name.

"Do I have you?" I ask quietly. "If things go badly, will you still be here?" She knew I was talking about more than just my dad.

"Quinn," she started, sounding wary.

"I just...I know we weren't friends...that we aren't friends, and that's my fault. You've always been there for me when I needed you. I'd like to know that if things don't work out that you'll still be there for me. I need to know."

I pulled back and saw a tear slip out of her eye. She blinked to stop more from falling. "If you need me, I'll be here."

I leaned in to kiss her, expecting her to stop me, but she just met me halfway. This kiss was a lot slower than any of the others we'd shared. I was pulling her as close to me as she could go. I didn't want her to go...didn't want her to run away like I had...like she had every right to after everything I'd done. She didn't seem to mind, though, because she slipped her tongue into my mouth, and I moaned at the sensation.

We jumped apart when we heard the bell ring for class. I missed the contact as soon as it was gone.

"I'm sorry," I said, hoping she would understand.

"It's okay. You needed it." I was pretty sure that as she sighed out, I heard her say, "And so did I."

"Well...I guess we need to go to class."

"You go first," she said, staring at my hand. It was only then I noticed Sam's stupid ring. "You don't want to keep him waiting."

I wanted to say that he didn't mean anything to me. I wanted to say that the only person that had ever truly touched my heart was...but I still wasn't ready to say it, not even in my own thoughts, so I just nodded and started to walk out of the bathroom. Before I walked out, I turned back to her.

"I'll stop them," I said,.

"Stop what?"

"Stop the slushies...so you don't have to hide out in here every morning."

She looked at the floor. "Quinn, you don't have to do that. I know it hasn't been you."

I stepped closer to her and put my hand on her chin, making her look me in the eyes. "I started it, so I can stop it," I said. "You don't deserve them, Rach." With that, I walked out the door.

I got to class, and Sam had a seat saved for me. I took it, but when he tried to kiss me, I pulled away.

"Where were you?" he asked. "I went by your locker, and you were MIA."

"I just needed some time to think," I replied.

"Well, can't you at least kiss me for putting up with your moodiness?"

That was it. That was all I could take. There was Rachel, sweet and loving despite the fact that I'd treated her like shit the entirety of our acquaintance. Then, there was Sam, basically well-meaning, but dim and not understanding in the slightest. Why was I with him? I took off my ring and set it on his desk.

"What're you doing?" he asked.

"I'm breaking up with you. I'm sorry."

"What? But why?"

I couldn't quite tell him the truth. "We aren't compatible."

"But we're both the most popular people in school. And we're both in glee together."

I rolled my eyes. "There's more to life than being popular. We just don't fit. I'm sorry."

"I don't think you mean this, Quinn. You're just upset about whatever's been going on with you lately and you're taking it out on me."

"Sam, just drop it, okay? We're done. That's it."

He sighed. "We'll talk more after class, okay?"

I nodded. I owed him that much. I was just about to start taking notes when I heard a buzz come from my backpack. It was a text...from Rachel, who must have decided to just skip out on class. I flipped my phone open and read the single-sentence text.

**You called me Rach.**

I smiled and typed back.

**I shorten all of my friend's names :)**

I didn't know what I was feeling or what was going to happen with my home or with Rachel, but I needed a friend, and she did too. I figured I'd finally take her up on the offer.


	6. Jealous

My dad moved in two days later.

I'd been expecting him to move in, but when my mom had said soon, I didn't think it would be that soon. I'd been trying to avoid him, spending most of my nights at Santana's house. Rachel had offered, but I didn't think I could control myself around her enough to spend the night with her. I'd been over to her house a few times, but that was it. The worst part of it was meeting Rachel's fathers, who weren't too thrilled to meet their daughter's personal tormentor. Rachel had told them all the stories before she knew that we were going to be friends. It didn't help that my parents were outspoken homophobes, either.

Rachel had defended me, though, which made me feel proud that I had such a good friend and sick that I'd treated her so badly for so long. Rachel saw the best in everyone and was so willing to forgive. She'd even suggested inviting Santana and Brittany over a few times, but Santana was still rude, and Brittany and I hadn't talked much since she'd hooked up with Artie.

It wasn't until two weeks later that I actually went to my house again. It made me a little sad that my parents hadn't even questioned me about my absence, but I was glad for it. The only reason I went home was to get some clothes and my back-up Cheerios outfit, and I hoped that my dad would be at work.

Of course, life wasn't working in my favor.

I walked in the door, and there he was, sitting in our living room, flipping through the paper.

"Ah, Quinn. There you are," he said, like I was just a little late coming home instead of missing for two weeks.

"Hello," I said, and I went to walk up the stairs.

"Quinn, I'd like to have a word with you. Sit down."

I hated myself for immediately obeying. He still had so much power over me. "Yes?"

"Your mother and I have been talking in your absence, and I've come to a decision," he took a sip of his drink. He was always drinking. They both were.

"About what?" I asked.

"I've decided that I'll let you continue living here under some conditions."

I wanted to laugh or spit in his face or...something. This was MY home. HE should have been the one who had to adhere to conditions. He was the one that cheated. I still didn't have enough courage to say anything like that to him, though.

"Okay," was all I could manage.

"First, I'll need to meet this Sam boy that your mother says you're seeing."

"Sam and I broke up," I said.

"Well, in the future, if there are any other boys that you're with, they'll need to go through me first, understood?"

I nodded. I wondered briefly what his reaction would be if I brought home a girl...more specifically, a girl with two gay dads. I had to hold back a smile as an image of him dropping dead of a heart attack popped into my head.

"Is there anything else?" I asked, just wanting to leave again.

"Yes, there is. I expect you to come to church with us every Sunday, to show everyone that you've got your life back on track, and to worship the Lord with your family." Again, I wanted to laugh at the fact that appearances came before God. "Also, I've let you stay away from the house for a while to let you have your space, but I think it's time you stayed home. We need to start putting this family back together."

_What family? You cheat, mom drinks, and I'm the great disappointment. First pregnant, now gay..._

The thought shocked me. I'd never thought of myself as gay before. How had my life become so complicated?

"I hope you know," he continued, "if you embarrass this family and yourself again, I won't be able to forgive you a second time. Last year was filled with mistakes, and we all need to get back to normal, yes?"

"Yes, sir," I said, standing up and walking out of the room. I didn't want to look at him anymore. Luckily, he let me go. I went to my room, shut the door, and shot Santana a text saying that I wasn't going to be coming back there. I tried to lay down and take a nap, because I was so tired. I hadn't been able to sleep well with everything happening in my life, and it was getting to the point that I was falling asleep in class.

Just as I started to fall asleep, I heard my phone ring, and I grabbed it angrily.

"This better be good," I growled out.

"Quinn?" the voice on the other side of the line said.

"Rachel?" I said, sitting up in my bed and shaking my head to clear out the fuzzies. "Sorry, I thought you were Santana. What's up?"

"Are you okay? You sound tired. Y'know, I'd totally understand if you wanted to cancel our plans for today. I saw you falling asleep in glee yesterday, and I know that rest and relaxation are very important, especially for someone as active as you."

Shit. Seeing my dad had totally thrown me off, and I'd completely spaced that I was supposed to go over to Rachel's house.

"Oh God, Rachel, I'm so sorry, but my dad just told me I have to stay home for a while."

"You're at your parents' house?" she asked. "Since when?

"I just went to get clothes, and he cornered me. I'm really sorry."

"No, Quinn, it's not your fault. Don't feel bad." I was glad that I didn't have to see the disappointment on Rachel's face that I heard in her voice, because it might've broken my heart.

"Look, when I'm off house arrest, I'll come hang out with you, okay?"

"Yeah. At least we have school."

My stomach clenched. Yes, I'd broken up with Sam and called off the slushies, but I wasn't really hanging out with Rachel at school yet. I felt like everyone would just look at us and know that something was going on. We mostly just exchanged glances in the hallways or during class, and then we'd hang out after school.

"Rachel-" I started, but she cut me off.

"I'm gonna go, let you sleep and stuff. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Rachel, wait," I said. "Please don't go."

"Why?" she asked.

"I just...I wanna hear your voice." There was silence on the other side of the phone. I was afraid she'd hung up."Rachel?"

"If you could see the stupid grin plastered on my face right now, you'd probably laugh at me."

I giggled. "Well, I'm glad to hear I made you smile for once." We didn't say anything for a little while. I was happy just having Rachel on the line, knowing she was thinking about me.

"Sam doesn't seem to be taking the break up very well," she finally said, and I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, he really isn't. You know he made me a list with all the reasons we should be together. Half of them had to do with popularity."

"How romantic," she said. "Yeah, Finn told me about that stupid idea the other day, and he-"

"Wait," I cut her off. "You were talking to Finn?"

She didn't say anything for a minute. I was about to say something, but she finally spoke up.

"Um...yes."

"Why?" I asked.

"He...tried to get back together with me, but before you say anything, I told him that I wasn't interested, and that I was only interested in regaining the friendship that we had before this all started." There was only one reason Finn Hudson ever wanted to make friends with girls was because he wanted to be with them. He'd done It with me, and he'd done it to Rachel...twice. I knew it, but like I said, Rachel always assumed the best of people.

"Rachel, you do realize that he's just using this an excuse to get close to you again, right?" I, on the other hand, always assumed the worst.

"Quinn, you don't know that," she said. "We actually had quite a strong friendship while he was dating you, and although we went through a rough break-up the first time, he was a great friend to me while I was with Jesse."

"And both of those times he was trying to get with you. I saw the way he looked at you while I was at me. Hell, he told me that he wished I was more like you."

"He did not!" she said, laughing a little.

"That's so not funny!" I tried to sound angry, but it was hard to be mad at Rachel when she was laughing like that. "Anyways, he wasn't very stealthy. It was clear he wanted you. He even told you while you were with Jesse that he wanted you. And, on top of all that, didn't you say that this all started with him trying to get you back?"

"You're being ridiculous, Quinn."

"And you're ignoring the obvious. I mean, do you want to get back with him, because I know that you care about him."

"Of course, I don't! I told you I don't love him!"

"Then why are you doing this? Why are you talking to him?"

"God what is wrong with...wait," she said. "Are you...are you jealous?"

I opened her mouth to tell her that she was being ridiculous. Of course I wasn't jealous. Then why didn't I want her talking to Finn? Why did the simple fact that he wanted to get back with her bother me so much.

"Yeah, I'm feeling sort of tired. I'm gonna go."

"Quinn...Quinn, wait."

"No, it's okay. Just call Finn or something." I hung up the phone. She tried to call me back, but I ignored it. I knew I was being stupid; Rachel hadn't done anything. Even if she did and she got back together with Finn, it wasn't like I could be mad. It wasn't like she was my girlfriend.

My emotional indecisiveness was starting to drive me crazy. One half of me wanted to believe that I just wanted Rachel as a friend. I wanted to be close to her. That didn't make me gay...no, what made me gay was that the other half of me was desperate to have Rachel's lips on mine...Rachel's hands in mine...or on my chest...or inside of me...

"Fuck," I said, realizing that I was breathing heavily and so wet it was almost uncomfortable. I tried to think back to the times I'd made out with Finn and Sam and the time I'd slept with Puck. I tried to remember if they'd ever made me this wet, and just thinking about them at all was turning me off. It scared me just how much power Rachel had over my body...over me completely. I got out of bed, took what felt like the thousandth cold shower I'd taken since this all happened, and went to bed, trying to think about anything but Rachel.

The next day at school, I was on a mission.

Santana gave me a ride since I was fiercely trying to avoid Sam, and we walked into school together. We'd been getting along a lot better since we were both having girl troubles, and our rivalry felt like it was finally dying down, for now. I knew something would come up and destroy the peacefulness that our friendship had, but I was enjoying having one relationship that I understood.

I walked to my locker and waited for Rachel to show up at hers. I felt sort of stupid standing there waiting for her, and I was a little concerned that Sam would walk up and start trying to get me back again, but I really wanted to see her.

"You know, this is sort of gross," I heard Santana say next to me. "You're like a lovesick puppy...over Manhands."

I snapped my head in her direction. "How many times have I told you that we're done with the nicknames?"

"What, you just expect me to suddenly be nice because you've got the hots for her? Come on, Quinn."

"You know, there are a lot of things that I could call Brittany, if you really want to push it."

Santana glared at me. "Difference is, Brittany's your friend, too. I'm only putting up with Berry because of you."

I was going to say something back, but I saw Rachel coming down the hallway.

With Finn by her side.

I hated it. I hated seeing that stupid grin on his stupid face, because that grin meant he was flirting. That half smile had its charms when we were dating, but now that he was trying to get with Rachel, I just found it extremely annoying. I thought about running in the opposite direction or punching Finn right in the face, but I figured both options would attract too much attention, so I just walked up to them as they got to Rachel's locker.

"Hey Rachel," I said, smiling at her. "Frankenteen," I almost grunted at Finn, surprised at how easily the insult came out of my mouth. I turned back to Rachel. "Why are you talking to him?"

I felt like I'd had this conversation before_..._

"Um, I think I have more of a right to talk to her," I heard Finn said. "I mean, we're actually friends."

"And who says we're not friends?" I asked.

"Um...you. All the time. You actually make it a point to be really mean." Finn turned to Rachel and smiled. "And yeah, she can be a little annoying, but she's cool, and she doesn't need you being all bitchy."

"Yeah, well, that's why we're friends now," I said. I faced Rachel, and she looked a little confused. "In fact, I was wondering if you would want to walk to class with me."

"Hey," Finn chimed in. "I was going to walk her to class."

I didn't even look at him. All I could see was Rachel and the grin that had broken out across her face.

"Finn, while I appreciate that you wanted to walk me to class, your class is on the other side of the school, and Quinn and I share our first period, so it's just more logical for Quinn to escort me."

I looked back at Finn, and his eyes looked glazed over. Leave it to him to not even be able to concentrate through a single sentence.

"Okay," I said, turning back to Rachel. "Ready to go?" Rachel just nodded, and we left Finn standing by her locker, confused.

"That was a little mean," Rachel said as we walked. "I mean, Frankenteen? You sounded like Santana."

"Ouch," I said. I stopped, and Rachel stopped with me. Class was about to start, so the halls were mostly empty. "Look, Rachel...you were right."

"About what?" she asked.

"About me being...jealous. I really don't like the thought of Finn hitting on you and you...I don't know..." I sounded like a twelve-year-old boy trying to tell a girl that he liked her. I hated myself a little bit.

"Quinn," Rachel said, not being too affectionate, because there were a few stragglers. "I understand."

I smiled. "Okay, so I felt bad about yesterday, so I bought you something." I handed her a box, and she smiled at me.

"Quinn, while the thought is extremely sweet, you know I'm vegan and I can't eat chocolate."

"Yeah, okay, I thought about that. That's why I bought these specific chocolates for you."

Rachel read the label, and her eyes went a little wide. "Are these vegan-friendly chocolates?" I nodded and she smiled. "Where did you even find these?"

I just shrugged. "I have my ways." The truth was, I'd told my parents that I needed to get some stuff from Santana's house, and I'd driven to every chocolate and candy stare I could find until I found one that served vegan stuff. She didn't need to know all of that, though.

"Well, all I have to say is thank you." We walked to class. When we got there, there were only a few seats open. Rachel sat first, and I sat next to her. When she looked at me confused, I smiled.

"We're friends, Rachel. It's stupid to hide it." Again, she smiled, and again, I felt like I was melting. It was true; it was stupid to hide a friendship. All it did was hurt Rachel and make it where we barely got to talk to each other. Rachel and I spent every single minute we could together that day. When we sat next to each other in glee and everyone stared at us like we were crazy, we just ignored them. The school was a buzz with rumors as to why we were suddenly being friendly. Most people thought I was plotting against Rachel for all of the boyfriend stealing. I was relieved that was the conclusion that the student body jumped to.

When I felt Rachel grab my hand in glee and shoot me a look that asked if that was okay, I nodded. When I felt her hand in mine, and saw the smile on her face, I knew I'd done the right thing.

* * *

A/N: Okay, so this chapter is sort of flufftastic filler. It's just sort of here to get the ball rolling for future drama and to show that the girls are really trying to be friends outside of their desire to jump each other. In any case, it'll get gritty again very soon.


	7. Stop

Rachel and I became inseparable, to the dismay of the general population of McKinley. They hadn't had a huge problem stopping the slushies, but it seemed that Rachel and I actually being friends was totally throwing off the social hierarchy too much.

"I don't get it, though," she'd said to me one afternoon at lunch. "I dated Finn and Puck, and they're popular. What's the big deal with us being friends?"

"I think they think it's okay to talk to you to get into your pants or something. They don't get why I'd want to hang out with you." She'd looked at me, frowning, so I'd grabbed her hand and said, "They don't know you like I do."

We'd been having little moments like that more often lately. Never in public where everyone could see, just in private when she'd have me over dinner, or on the rare occasions that she'd come over to my house for an afternoon.

That was another issue. Rachel's parents didn't like me. They were polite and never said directly said anything to me about it, but it wasn't very hard to tell. They'd make comments about how mean I was to Rachel, how they'd had to buy her so many outfits over the years, just leaving off the fact that it was because of me. If you weren't looking for it, you probably wouldn't catch it. I did, and so did Rachel, so we mostly just stayed away from her dads. Once in a while, I'd hear her arguing with them, and I'd feel guilty, because I didn't deserve to be defended. Everything they said was true.

My parents on the other hand, weren't so subtle. They were very open about their bigoted views and opinions. Rachel had actually left in tears a few times because of comments about her religion or her fathers. I'd try to run after her and tell her how sorry I was, but my father would tell me to let her go, and I would. I didn't have the courage to stand up for her like she stood up for me, even though she actually deserved it. I was too afraid of losing my home again, even though I knew there were other places I could go...other people that actually loved and cared about me. I still feared my father enough not to step out of line again.

Rachel always forgave me, though. She always took me back with open arms, promising me that it wasn't my fault that my father was so defective. I didn't get how Rachel could be such a good person when all I'd seen before (or all I'd paid attention to) was the bossy diva that couldn't give up a solo. I guessed that's all she wanted to show everyone so she wouldn't get hurt. Why she'd chosen to show her real self to someone who kept continually hurting her, I didn't get, either. I guess it was because she loved me.

"Why exactly do you trust me?" I asked her. I could tell the question took her by surprise. Not shocking, considering that we'd been talking in her room about Vocal Adrenaline and the Warblers for the last fifteen minutes. Not that I wasn't paying attention, but I had a lot on my mind...especially because we were laying on her bed.

"Where's this coming from?" she asked.

"I've been meaning to ask you for a while now. I mean, I wouldn't trust me if I were you."

Rachel just looked at me, then looked away. "Honestly?" I nodded. "I don't want you to be mad, because I've been greatly enjoying our friendship, and I don't want this to change anything or upset you."

"Rach, just tell me." She smiled a little at that, but then went back to frowning.

"The truth is...I don't trust you, Quinn. I can't."

My heart sank. I should have been expecting this answer. How could she trust me when I'd treated her so terribly for so long? How could she trust me when I had called her a freak and pushed her away when she admitted loving me? A part of me knew that was going to be her answer. Still, it hurt to hear it said out loud.

"Oh," was all I could say, trying to keep the waver out of my voice.

"Hey," she said, propping herself up with her arm, using her free hand to wipe the tears off my face that I didn't even know had fallen. "Don't cry. Please, don't cry."

"I'm sorry," I said. "About everything."

"I know," she replied. "You've said that about a thousand times."

"I just want you to know, okay? I don't really think any of that stuff about you."

Rachel just looked at me before saying, "Why did you do it, then?"

"What?" I asked.

"Why did you do and say all that stuff if you didn't mean any of it."

I shrugged. "It was easy. You were unpopular and loud and had weird taste in clothing. You had two gay dads that you weren't afraid to bring up all the time. You use so many words to say the simplest things. It was easy to look at all that stuff and make fun of you and convince myself I hated you." I hated making Rachel sad, but I figured being honest was better than sugar coating it and having her feel lied to.

"But you don't hate me?" she asked, sounding hopeful.

"No, Rachel." I put my hand on her cheek, and I felt her lean into it. "I don't hate you."

I wanted to kiss her. Surprisingly, nothing had happened since the day we decided to officially become friends, but that didn't mean I didn't want to, and I was pretty sure she wasn't against kissing me, either. Still, every time something was about to happen between us, I'd pull away out of fear. If I kept letting this happen, I wasn't sure I would be able to stop. Stop the frequency or how far we went.

But this time, I couldn't find it in myself to stop. Our lips came together, and immediately, I felt her tongue in my mouth. She moaned...or I did. I couldn't really tell, because the next thing I knew, she was kissing her way down my jawline to my neck.

"Rachel...slow down," I managed to get out. She pulled back, and her eyes were almost black.

"Do you want me to stop?" Before that moment, I only thought Rachel's voice could be high-pitched and crystal clear. In that moment, though, it'd taken on a deep, husky quality that almost made me push her mouth back onto my neck and push her hand under my skirt. Instead, I just pulled her on top of me and went back to kissing her. I knew we needed to stop this before it went to far, but I couldn't quite get my body to agree to that.

The next thing I knew, Rachel was pulling at my Cheerios top, and I sat up to help her get it off of me. Rachel was wearing a t-shirt (I'd talked her out of wearing the sweaters at least half of the time), and I pulled it off, shocked at what I saw.

How had I not noticed that she wasn't wearing a bra?

I smiled and without thinking, I flipped us over and passed over her left nipple with my tongue a few times before I sucked it into my mouth.

"Oh God," I heard her say above me. "Quinn!"

Her moans and pants just pushed me on. After a few minutes, I moved to her other nipple, giving it the same attention I gave the first one. I palmed the other one in my hand. I felt like Rachel was trying to tell me something, but I was way beyond being able to comprehend words, and I was pretty sure whatever Rachel was saying didn't make any sense.

I went back to kissing her neck, and Rachel ran her nails down my back. I hadn't even known I was into anything like that until Rachel had done it to me the first time. I moaned, and Rachel ran her hand back up my back just as hard. Before I even knew what I was doing, I was playing with the waistband of Rachel's skirt. Right as I was about to slip my fingers inside so I could feel her, she grabbed my wrist.

"Quinn," she said, barely above a whisper. "Please, stop."

I pulled back and looked at her. I couldn't quite read what was going on her head. It was then that I thought about what was just about to happen. Rachel and I were about to actually have sex...I was about to take Rachel's virginity. I started to panic. Is that what Rachel had been trying to tell me? Had she been trying to stop me, and I just ignored her?

"Oh my God," I said, jumping off of her. "Oh God, I'm so sorry, Rachel. I didn't mean...Oh God." I grabbed my Cheerios top and pulled it back on and started shoving my books and papers into my backpack.

"Quinn, slow down," she said. "It's okay."

"No," I said, not looking at her, feeling like a molester. "It's not okay. It's the farthest thing away from okay there is. That wasn't good." I ran out of the room, not looking back at Rachel. I cried the entire car ride home. I tried to stop my tears on the way into my house, because I didn't want my parents to see. In the first stroke of luck I'd had in what seemed like forever, they weren't home. I ran up to my room and threw myself onto my bed and cried. I wanted to just fall asleep...or die. It didn't really matter to me. Just as I was trying to close my eyes to stop the tears, my phone rang. I knew it wasn't Rachel (she'd changed her ringtone to "Don't Rain on My Parade" about two weeks before), so I just assumed it was Santana. I was tempted to let it go to voicemail, but I knew that she'd show up to my house if I didn't answer.

"I really don't wanna talk, San," I said.

"Quinn? Is this Quinn?" It wasn't Santana.

"Brittany?" She hadn't called me in a while. She'd been spending a lot more time with Artie and his friends.

"Yeah. What's up?" she asked, and I couldn't help but smile a little.

"Brittany, you called me," I said.

"Oh yeah...well, you seem sad, so never mind."

"Wait," I said. "What do you need?"

"I was just going to ask you for some advise about love and stuff, but you don't seem like you're going to be much help."

"What's wrong?" I asked. Sure, Brittany and I weren't always close (that had a lot to do with her closeness to Santana and the fact that Santana and I were so often in feuds), and I was pretty messed up over the fact that I felt like I'd almost forced myself on Rachel, but Brittany was still my friend, and I still cared.

"Well...I don't know...is it possible to be with someone, but love someone else?" Again, I rolled my eyes. I didn't understand how Santana had so much patience for Brittany when she didn't have patience for anyone or anything else.

"Yes, Britt, it's possible."

"Okay. But what if this person your with is really nice to you, even if he sort of treats you like your dumber than you really are, and the person you're in love with isn't nice to you at all and said she wouldn't sing a duet with you?"

"Brittany, we're talking about Artie and Santana, right?" There was silence on the other side of the phone. "Brittany?"

"Sorry, I was nodding. I always forget that you can't see a nod over the phone. Santana used to remind me of that without talking to me like a kid like Artie does." I heard her sigh, and my heart broke a little for her. "I miss Santana, but I don't miss her leaving me for Puck."

"I know, Britt, but I don't think I'm the one to give you good love advice right now," I said.

"Why not?" she asked. I couldn't tell her the truth, but this one was easily covered up with a lie.

"I just broke up with Sam, remember?"

"Oh yeah, but I just assumed that was because he was gay." I burst into laughter.

"Sam's not gay, Brittany," I said.

"You don't have to be embarrassed, Quinn. I made out with Kurt when he was going through his whole straight phase."

I laughed again. "Look, this has been really fun, but I really wanna get some sleep. I've sort of had an awful day."

"Okay. Well, if you wanna talk about it later, I'm available. Santana isn't the only person I've been missing." I smiled as she hung up without a formal goodbye. I wanted to slap Santana for hurting her. Still, talking to Brittany had been nice, and had distracted me from my idiocy when it came to Rachel just long enough to get me to fall asleep. I woke up three times in the middle of the night, having nightmares of Rachel telling me that she never wanted to speak to me again.

I hated myself.


	8. Explanations

A/N: Still totally overwhelmed by the amount of response this story is getting. It's very flattering. I hope you all are still enjoying it, because I'm having a lot of fun writing it. Enjoy!

* * *

I woke up the next day, not sure if I should try to avoid Rachel or beg for forgiveness. Avoiding her seemed like it would be easier in the long term...but that's only if she didn't want to talk to me. If she wanted to talk, then that option was going to be near impossible. Talking to her was the mature thing to do, but I didn't know if I could face her after what happened. I'd acted like a hormone-crazed 16-year-old boy...or, in simpler terms, Puck. She probably didn't even want to talk to me. I'd probably messed everything up, which I hated, because Rachel was one of the best friends I'd every had.

"Do you think I should talk to Rachel?" I asked Santana in the hallway after our 6 o'clock a.m. cheer practice. I'd told her what happened on our car ride to school.

"I've told you a thousand times, yes. She probably isn't even freaking out as much as you are. She probably doesn't even care."

"How could she not care? I almost took advantage of her, Santana. Not all of us are as open to that kind of thing." I knew it was a shot that she didn't really deserve, but she didn't get it, and it was starting to piss me off. "You didn't see her face. She looked so upset when I was leaving."

"Did you ever think that she might have been upset that you were just running out on her without an explanation?" she asked. I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. "Yeah, I didn't think so. She probably didn't care that you were trying to get in her pants. She probably just wanted to slow down or whatever."

"I hadn't thought about that," I said.

"That's because you're stupid," she said back, smirking at me.

"Oh, you're one to talk. Britt called me last night saying she missed you."

"Brittany called you last night?" she asked, and I nodded. "She said she misses me?" I nodded again. Santana actually looked a little vulnerable for a split second, then she got hard again. "Well, she's the one that went and got a boyfriend, not me."

"Yeah, you were just too busy jumping Puck to even notice that she was there."

"Fuck you, Quinn," she said. "I don't even know why I talk to you. Have fun with Treasure Trail." She walked off, leaving me alone. I knew that would piss her off, but I wanted it to. She needed to figure out whatever her thing was with Brittany as much as I needed to figure out my thing with Rachel. I walked to the glee room, hoping to get some peace and quiet (and secretly hoping to run into Rachel). Right before I walked in the doors, I heard voices inside, so I stopped and listened.

"Look, I've told you that I don't want to be with you. I do care about you, so I'd like to salvage our friendship, but if you insist on keeping up with this, I'm going to have to ask you to stop talking to me all together. It's making me uncomfortable." That, I was sure, was Rachel, which meant the other person had to be...

"You said you loved me, Rach." Finn. "You can't say that you just fell out of love with me this fast." I took a chance, and peeked around the corner. Rachel was standing close to the piano, Finn a few steps away. He took a step closer, and I didn't like how close that put the two of them.

"It's...it's complicated, Finn. I know that I said I loved you, but-"

"What? What are you trying to say to me?" He took yet another step, and I could feel my blood start to boil.

"I wasn't in love with you, Finn." Finn's jaw dropped open. "I'm sorry that I led you to believe otherwise. That was cruel of me."

"No," he said. "I don't believe that for a second. You spent months trying to break Quinn and I up."

"Quinn and me," she corrected, and I had to hold back a laugh.

"Whatever!" he yelled, and Rachel flinched a little. I really didn't want to get myself in between them, because this wasn't my business, but I couldn't quite bring myself to walk away. "You can't spend that much time trying to split us up and then say you don't love me." Rachel looked down, and something dawned on me. If she hadn't been trying to get Finn back then, then why had she split us up? Was it...was it for me? Had she loved me that long?

"I had other reasons to get you two apart," she said, and it just confirmed what I'd been thinking. "Again, Finn, I'm sorry, but-"

"Look, I know that I screwed up with Santana. I get that. I shouldn't have lied to you, but you cheated on me. Can't we just call it even?"

"This isn't about what happened with you and Santana," she said. "Yes, that did hurt me, and it was part of the reason that I went and did what I did with Puck, but that's not why I'm not taking you back now."

Finn shook his head. "Then why? Why are you saying you don't love me when I know you do?"

"I don't Finn," she said again.

"Is this...is this about Quinn?" he asked, and for a moment, I was afraid he'd figured it out, but he kept talking. "Is she telling you things to keep you away from me?"

Rachel shook her head. "This has nothing to do with Quinn."

Finn let out a humorless laugh. "Yeah, sure. Do you really think that Quinn wants to be your friend? She's a Cheerio again, Rachel. She's probably just doing Sue Sylvester's dirty work. Trying to break us up because we're the strongest people in the glee club!"

"While it's true that you and I are the two strongest vocalists in the club, I know that Quinn isn't trying to destroy us."

Finn rolled his eyes. "Open your eyes, Rachel! She's trying to win you over just to break you. Is she being really sweet and caring, but sort of distant?" I saw Rachel pause, then nod her head. "Yeah, that's how she was with me when she was trying to make me take care of a baby that wasn't even mine. She's just trying to get you to do something for her before she chews you up and spits you out."

Rachel looked shaken. "That's...that's not true."

"Rachel, I know that you like to think the best of people, unless they're trying for a solo or something, but you have to give up on Quinn. She's just using you. I'm not sure how, yet, but she is. Why else would she be talking to you?"

I could see the tears welling up in her eyes. She didn't believe what he was saying, did she?"

"I just...I thought..."

Finn grabbed her in a hug. "She does that. She's not a good person, Rachel." I wanted to step in, but a lot of what he was saying was true. I had used him...I was willing to let him believe that Puck's child was his. What kind of person does that?

I was about to walk away...about to let Finn say whatever he was going to say about me, because I couldn't deal with all of my shortcomings being pointed out for me. Before I could turn around and leave, I saw Finn pull back and look Rachel in the eye.

And then he leaned in and kissed her.

I felt like something inside of me was breaking. She'd said she didn't feel anything for Finn, but seeing them kissing, especially after everything he'd said to her about me...I was afraid he was winning her back. I didn't know how long I'd been standing there, staring at them while they kissed, but the next thing I knew, they were both staring at me.

"Quinn?" I heard Rachel say. I turned around and ran out of the room. I could hear Rachel calling my name behind me, but I didn't care. I just wanted her to turn around and leave me alone. She had ruined everything I thought I knew about myself, ruined my relationship, ruined what I imagined my life to be, but that wasn't even really what I was mad about. I was mad because seeing her kiss Finn Hudson had broken my heart. And if that had broken my heart, that only meant one thing.

_I love Rachel Berry._

I ran outside, hoping to hide in a corner of the parking lot, but it was raining, so I went out to Santana's car, sat inside, and cried, hoping that Rachel wouldn't find me. As luck would have it, it only took her about five minutes to track me down, banging on the door.

"Quinn! That wasn't what it looked like!" She was banging so hard I was a little afraid she'd break the glass. If she broke it, Santana would break me, so I rolled the window down, and she calmed down a little.

"Quinn," she said, "I know that you caught me in a compromising situation, but I promise that he kissed me. It was completely one-sided." I didn't say anything. I just kept staring out the windshield. "Please, you have to believe me. He just sprung it on me."

I turned my head and looked at her. I'd completely forgotten it was raining, too caught up in my own head. I unlocked the doors. Rachel walked around to the passenger's side and got in. Seeing her soaked from head to toe broke me out of my stupor.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" I asked, looking through the car for something to cover her up.

"Don't worry about it. I've got a spare set of clothes in my locker."

I eyed her suspiciously. "Why?"

"Well, after our fight, I thought..." she drifted off. I knew what she thought.

"You thought I'd start the slushies again?" Rachel stared at her hands in her lap. "Rachel...I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I made you feel that way." I was really sick of crying. I felt like it was all I did lately.

"I was just scared. You seemed really freaked out yesterday."

"I'm sorry for that, too," I said. "I got carried away, and I didn't mean to make you feel pressured or anything."

"I didn't feel pressured, Quinn. I thought you did."

"What? Why?" I asked.

"You ran out of the room saying that what we were doing wasn't good, Quinn. What was I supposed to think?" I wanted to laugh or cry...more...or something, but instead I just stared at Rachel like an idiot, so she kept talking. "I don't want you to feel like you have to kiss me. I've really enjoyed just having you as a friend, and if you don't want it to go beyond that, I understand."

"Rachel," I finally managed to say. "Did you...did you think I left because I didn't wanna kiss you?" Rachel nodded. "Rachel...Rachel, no. That's not it."

"Then what was it?" she asked.

"I felt bad...for taking advantage of you like that. You wanted me to stop, and I just ignored you."

"Quinn, I didn't wanna stop, I just wasn't ready to...y'know...go all the way." She grabbed one of my hands and held it. "I wasn't mad at you or anything." We sat silently for a minute before I finally spoke up.

"I'm sorry I just ran out on you," I said. "I'm not quite used to talking things out. It's not the Fabray way. Sweeping things under the rug or running or lashing out is the Fabray way."

"Yeah, I've sort of gathered that from knowing you for so long. Meeting your family helped, too."

I nodded. "I guess I have to get used to talking to people about my issues."

"I don't know," she said. "If that doesn't work for you , you could always sing your problems out." I laughed, and so did she. "Okay, now that we've got that all figured out, can we get inside now? First period's starting soon, and I really need to change." It was only then that I noticed how hard Rachel was shivering.

"Oh God," I said. "Let's go. I've got an umbrella in the back." We got out of the car and walked into the school. I tried to talk her into letting me help her change, but she said that it would probably distract us from getting to class on time, so I went to class. When she got to class, I shot her a text.

**You should know, I'm never going to have you slushied again.**

I looked at her as she got the text. She smiled and I saw her type something out. I felt my phone buzz in my lap a few seconds later.

**I'll never doubt you again :)**

I smiled and slipped my phone back into my backpack. The day had just started and a lot had already happened. I mean, I'd finally admitted to myself that I was in love with Rachel. With my life just starting to stabilize and my dad moving back in, things were too complicated for me to be in love with another girl. Still, with Rachel smiling at me from across the room, I couldn't help but feel like nothing else really mattered.


	9. Confrontations

A/N: Hope everyone had happy holidays and a new year and so on...I would've written, but I got the flu and sort of just wanted to die...anyways, I hope I can get back to regular updates. Enjoy this, and R&R as always.

* * *

I thought things were going to get easier. I thought that now that I'd admitted to myself that I was in love with Rachel that everything would start to fall into place. I'd be able to talk to her about my feelings, and she'd help me sort through them, and we'd go from there. I didn't know why I thought that; nothing ever seems to go quite right for me. Rachel and I had barely spoken since that day in Santana's car. It seemed like the universe was trying to keep us apart.

We couldn't really talk in school. Sam kept trying to get back in my good graces by dragging me off to have long conversations (that usually turned into arguments) with him. On top of that, Finn was still trying to win Rachel back, and he had convinced half of the club that I was plotting something with Sylvester, so they were all running interference. The fact that so many people in the club were willing to believe that hurt more than a little bit. I knew that everyone loved Finn or whatever, but weren't these people supposed to be my friends, too?

We tried to hang out with each other outside of school, but that was nearly impossible. My dad and mom decided that it would be better if I spent more time at home with the "family." Apparently, they weren't thrilled that I'd broken up with a nice boy like Sam (who, by the way, introduced himself to my parents while I wasn't there...and they loved him) and started hanging out with "unsavory company" like Rachel.

"Those people aren't right," my father had said one night about Rachel's dads. "They corrupt everything they touch, and I don't want you hanging around them. You're too easily influenced by bad people, Quinn."

He may've been right. I mean, I'd listened to his bullshit my entire life.

I'd tried to get Rachel to come over as much as I possibly could, and she did, at first. My dad became more vicious and hurtful the more she came over, and she finally couldn't take it anymore when one night my father decided to take it up another notch over dinner.

"I don't see why you don't think gay people can raise children! My fathers raised me, and I think that I've turned out to be a very talented, well-rounded, and overall successful person!" Rachel was practically screaming at this point. This conversation had been going on for about twenty minutes. It happened every time Rachel came over; the two of them were just too opinionated in the exact opposite ways, and they'd always end up fighting.

"You may think that you're successful, but you're fathers have brainwashed you to think that they're choices in life are okay, and frankly, they're only going to lead to an eternity of damnation!"

"Dad, please stop," I tried.

"Quinn, this is what I was talking about. You need to see that what she's saying is wrong." He turned back to Rachel. "I feel sorry for you, Rachel. You're fathers have mislead you your entire life."

"Dad! Stop!" I yelled, and his eyes snapped back to me. I hated myself for feeling a little afraid.

"Russel..." my mom started, but when he ignored her, she trailed off. Typical.

"Did you just raise your voice to me?" I knew this was going to get worse than it ever had before. I just wanted it to stop.

"I just think you should calm down," I said.

"Listen to me, young lady. This is my house, and you will respect me!"

"No offense, Mr. Fabray, but I think Quinn lost her respect for you a long time ago." I appreciated that Rachel was standing up for me, but she seriously needed to learn how to shut up sometimes.

My dad got to his feet and leaned across the table towards Rachel. "You know nothing of respect, because your fagot fathers had no idea how to raise you with the right morals!"

It felt like all of the air had been sucked out of the room. Had he really just said what I thought he said. The shocked expression on Rachel's face told me that he had. After a moment, my dad sat back down, trying to calm himself down. My mom started rubbing his back, and I almost lost it. I looked at Rachel, who looked like she was trying to compose herself. When she finally got herself together enough, she stood up and left without a word. I stood up to follow her, but my dad grabbed my hand.

"Quinn, sit down and finish your dinner."

Normally, I would've obliged, afraid of what he would do when I got back, but I'd seen the look on Rachel's face, and I couldn't let her leave without saying something. I snatched my hand away.

"You crossed a line, Dad," I said, and I ran after Rachel. When I got outside, I didn't see her, but I figured she couldn't have gotten that far since she'd walked to my house. I finally saw her.

"Rachel!" I called after her, but she didn't respond. "Rachel! Rach, wait!" I grabbed her shoulder and spun her around. What I saw shocked me. Sure, I'd been expecting the tears and the look of hurt, but it was her eyes...they looked like they were on fire. I'd never seen her this furious. I wasn't sure I'd ever seen anyone this furious.

"How dare he judge my fathers! They've done nothing but love and support me my entire life! They've put up with my attitude and my mood swings and my high maintenance personality and they've never asked anything of me other than love and a basic respect for them!"

"Rachel, I-"

"No!" she yelled. "I'm not even close to being done!" She was being so loud I was sure our neighbors would be able to hear, but I didn't care so much. In fact, I sort of hoped they did so it could tarnish the Fabray name a little more.

"That man is the one that doesn't know how to be a parent! He's the one that forced his oldest daughter to go to a college she hated! He's the one that's made his wife too afraid to speak her mind and too afraid to lose him even after he cheated on her! He's the one that's made you afraid to be who you really are! I hate him! I've never hated someone so much in my entire life!" I wanted to tell her I felt the same way, but I was too afraid to interrupt her, so I just grabbed her and hugged her, but she pushed me away.

"No, Quinn," she said. "I wanna be mad right now, and if you hold me, it'll go away, and I'll just feel hurt." I took a step back. I understood. It's a lot easier to be mad at a bigot that be hurt by the fact that he just insulted your family.

"Okay," I said. "Lay it on me. If you've got anything else to say about it, I'll listen."

She just sighed. "It's too late, Quinn. The fury's gone. I could never stay mad for very long. I just...how could he say that to me, Quinn? I've been slushied and thrown in dumpsters and had food shoved in my face. I've been told that my dads should give me back and I should be sterilized." I hated being reminded of how much I'd hurt her in the past. "But what he said...nothing's ever hurt me like that before. He wasn't talking about my dads. I mean he didn't realize that, but he was talking about everyone like my dads."

"I know, Rachel. He's an idiot."

"No, Quinn. You aren't getting it. He wasn't just talking about my dads. He was talking about gay people, like me...and..."

My eyes widened in realization. Rachel wasn't just defending her dads in all of these fights...she'd been defending me.

"Rachel..." It was all I could manage to get out of my mouth.

"I don't understand how he can't see what he's putting you through..how he can't see that you flinch every time he brings this stuff up." I hadn't even realized that I did that. Sure, I'd feel my stomach drop every time, but I didn't I was doing anything visible. I probably wasn't. Rachel was just that tuned into me. "I don't want him to hurt you anymore."

I could feel the tears start running down my cheeks. I'd never had anyone care about me like Rachel did. No one ever loved me this much. Before I could stop myself, I closed the distance between us and kissed her. For that moment, I didn't care who saw us. I didn't care if the entire fucking world saw us; I just needed to kiss her. We broke apart and both gasped for air. Rachel smiled at me.

"Well, if this is what happens every time I stick up for you, I'll go for round two with your dad."

"No!" I said, chuckling. We stood there like that for a minute before she pulled away.

"I really need to get home," she said.

"Do you want me to walk with you?"

She shook her head. "No, you're probably in enough trouble as it is." When I tried to argue, she held her hand up. "No, you have nowhere to go if you get kicked out this time, okay? I hate to say this, but I think it's best if you just go back and take whatever idiotic punishment he's going to give you."

I nodded, and she started to walk away. Before she got far, though, I grabbed her and gave her a peck on the cheek. We went our separate ways.

Since then, my dad had made a point of checking my phone to make sure I wasn't talking to Rachel. He'd grounded me for a month. I was only allowed on my phone or the computer if it was for school. I was to come straight home from school. He even went down and got my Cheerios and glee schedule to make sure I wasn't lying about practices. He'd contemplated forcing me to quit glee, but decided it would be fine as long as Sam was there to watch out for me. He'd actually said those exact words to Sam when he'd invited him over for dinner one night.

Rachel's dads hadn't been able to get her to confess what happened at my house, so they just assumed that her tears were my fault, and they banned me from her house. She'd tried to explain to them that this wasn't my fault, but they wouldn't listen. The only time Rachel and I really had together was first period and glee, and even then, we didn't really get to talk. I needed to do something, because not being able to talk to Rachel at all was starting to drive me crazy. I decided it would be easier to fix the school situation than it would our parents, so I started with Sam.

"Sam, we need to talk," I said one day during lunch. He smiled at me, probably thinking that I was finally "coming to my senses" and taking him back.

"Yeah, sure," he said. "What's up?"

"Look, Sam, I get that you like me, but this whole stalker routine has got to stop. I need alone time and time with people other than you, okay? We can still be friends, but that's it."

Sam rolled his eyes. "We've been over this a hundred times, Quinn. We make sense together. Even your dad thinks so."

Again, Sam proves how thick he is. If he really knew me, he'd know that my dad's approval meant next to nothing. It almost counted against him.

"Okay, I will admit that on paper, we make sense." He smiled and started to lean in. I pushed him back. "However, I'm just not into you that way."

"You were when we were dating," he said. It was my turn to roll my eyes.

"You know what? You're right." Again, he got stupid hopeful face. "We have been over this a hundred times. I don't know how to make it any clearer to you. I. Don't. Like. You. Like. That! Now, if you keep insisting on following me around like a puppy, I'm doing to have to do something drastic."

"Like what?" he asked.

"Like telling Santana that you were mean to Brittany."

His eyes widened. "That won't work. She'll ask Britt if it's true."

"Actually, they currently aren't speaking, but that hasn't really dulled Santana's protective nature at all."

He opened his mouth a few times, trying to say something, but nothing came out. Finally, he took a deep breath and spoke.

"Okay, I'll back off, but if your dad invites me over, I'm not going say no. It's rude." With that, he walked away. I smiled. It was at least a start.

I still had to talk to Hudson. That was going to be a lot harder, because as much as I hated it, he really did love Rachel in his own simple way, and he was fiercely protective of her. I'd tried to talk to him during the second half of lunch, but he was busy flirting with Rachel, so I was left sitting on the other side of the lunchroom glaring at him, hoping that I could make his head explode if I stared long enough.

It wasn't until after glee practice that I finally got a chance to talk to him. He was hanging around with Rachel.

"Finn, could I talk to you really fast?" I said, trying to keep the hatred out of my voice. Rachel shot me a look of confusion, but she didn't argue.

"Actually, Quinn, I'm sort of busy with Rachel right now." He put his arm around her, and if Rachel hadn't been quick to remove it, I probably would've ripped it off.

"We can always practice tomorrow," she said. "I'll see you around." He kissed her on the cheek, and I almost threw up. She brushed up against me as she left the room and called, "Goodbye, Quinn," over her shoulder. I got so caught up in the little gesture that I forgot Finn was standing there.

"Okay, what do you want?" he asked. "It better not be about what I think it is."

"Finn, you need to back off. I get that you love her, but I'm not trying to hurt her, okay? I like her."

"Yeah, sure you do," he said. "Look, I'm not as stupid as you think I am. I know that you're just trying to break us up!"

"You're already broken up," I reminded him.

"Not for long, as long as I keep you away from her. What exactly have you been telling her about me, anyways?"

"Oh my God, you do realize that the whole universe doesn't revolve around you, right? We hardly ever talk about you!"

"But you do talk about me?" he asked. God, he was thick.

"You're her ex, Finn. Of course you come up. So do Puck and Sam. It's no different."

"No, I know you don't really care about her. There's no way," he started pacing back and forth. "You tried to get back together with me earlier this year! Now that you know that won't work, you're going this route!"

I rolled my eyes. I seemed to be doing that a lot lately. "Okay, first of all, that was her idea." I hadn't meant to tell him that, considering it really wasn't my business to tell, but it just slipped out.

"Why would she do that?" he asked me angrily.

"That's not even the important part," I said, trying to distract him. "The point is, I didn't break the two of you up. You did that yourself. In fact, you're the one that broke things off, even though you screwed up!"

"She cheated on me!" he yelled. "With Puck!"

"And you fucked Santana and then lied about it, and every time she got mad about it, instead of trying to apologize, you acted like a jackass and said it was only because it was Santana! It wasn't that you slept with Santana. Hell, it wasn't even that you slept with anyone; it was because you lied to her. Even when she came clean about Jesse, you still didn't tell her the truth!"

"How do you know all this stuff?" he asked.

"Because I'm her friend, Finn. I actually listen to her when she speaks instead of humming a song in my head until I see her lips stop moving!" This wasn't going the way I hoped it would. "I question how much you actually love her if you don't care about what she has to say. There are other girls you could go to if you just wanted a piece of ass."

He kicked over a chair and stepped closer to me. "You don't know anything about me and Rachel. I love her, she just talks a lot. It's almost impossible to take it all in."

"And yet, I seem to have no problem with it," I said, putting my hands on my hips. "By the way, is this supposed to be scaring me right now? It's not working."

"Whatever, Quinn. Just know that I'm never gonna let you get close to Rachel. I'm gonna figure out what this is about, and I'm gonna make Rachel see what a bitch you are...and win her back."

"Have you ever thought that you're not good enough for her, Finn?"

"Yeah, well, I'm the best she's going to get here. Who are her other options? Puck? Jewfro? There aren't many people who want her, Quinn."

It took everything in me not to slap the taste out of his mouth. First of all, he didn't even realize he'd just insulted the girl he was in love with. Second of all, and I knew it was stupid to be mad about this, but he didn't even realize that we were currently fighting over her. He didn't have any reason to think we were, but I still hated not being included in Rachel's possible suitors.

"Finn, I'm going to get my way one way or another," I said. "It would just be easier if you backed off now." With that, I left the choir room, worried that if I stayed much longer, my dad would come find me. That conversation had been a complete waste of time. I was pretty sure that Finn was going to make even more of an effort to keep me away from Rachel. I was so frustrated, I wanted to grab something or someone and pound it into chalk dust.

I went home, hoping to get away from everything, but my dad was waiting for me.

"Where were you?" he asked almost as soon as I walked in the door.

"I stayed after glee for a minute."

"To talk to Rachel?" he asked.

"No, Finn."

My dad frowned. "Is that the boy you brought over?"

"You mean when you kicked me out?" I asked, really not in the mood for another fight today. He just nodded. "Yes, Dad. That was Finn."

"I'm not very fond of him," he said, and I found myself agreeing with him for the first time in ages.

"We're not together, Dad. We were just talking about glee." He seemed to accept that answer and went back to reading his paper, and I went up to my room before he changed his mind. I flung myself onto my bed and shut my eyes as tightly as I could. I hated this...I hated boys and parents and, and this point, anyone that wasn't Rachel. They were all getting on my nerves. I had no idea how I was going to spend time with Rachel. Suddenly, an idea struck me, an idea that would prove beneficial for everyone involved in this. Well, everyone involved that I cared about, anyway.


	10. Cheerios

A/N: This doesn't have much Faberry. It's mostly Santana/Quinn (friendship only! Don't panic!), which sort of makes it filler, but I assure you, the next chapter will be good. I just have to think of an idea for it first. As always, R&R, and don't be afraid to leave suggestions for where this story should go. I might take your ideas.

* * *

I had plan for the next day at school. We had early Cheerios practice, which went terribly, because half of the girls had decided to ditch because they hated that I was captain again. I was annoyed and satisfied at the same time, because it just worked in favor of my plan.

"Fabray!" Coach Sylvester called after we decided to end practice early. "My office! Now!" I debated whether to take a shower first or not. On the one hand, if I went straight to her office, by the time she was done with me, I probably wouldn't have time to shower off. On the other hand, if I didn't go straight to her office, I was pretty sure she'd kill me...or at least kick me off the squad.

"If any of those girls shows up to school today, I'm personally going to kick each of their asses," Santana said to me as we walked off of the field. "Practice was hell. If I have to run one more suicide because bitches have problems, I swear to God-"

"Calm down," I said.

"No! I'm the one who got stabbed in the back, and I still show up!" Santana was fuming, and because it wasn't directed at me, I just thought it was a little funny.

"To be fair," I interrupted, "you stabbed me in the back first by telling people I was pregnant."

"You know, I'm sort of trying to stick up for you right now," she said, and I rolled my eyes. "Besides, that's just the nature of our relationship. We piss each other off."

I laughed a little. "It's really sad that we're each other's best friend. You'd think we'd be able to find some people who actually like us to hang around with."

"Let's face it, Quinn: no one can stand us but us." She paused. "Well, I guess you have Berry now...so I guess it's just me."

I sighed. "You know, it's nice to have a friendship that doesn't have all the complications that my friendship with Rachel has."

She laughed. "Quinn, I think we have the MOST complicated relationship in the history of the world." She looked at her watch. "I've gotta go. Puck's waiting for me in the janitor's closet."

"Gross," I said.

"Yeah, that was a joke. I haven't slept with Puckerman for weeks...months, even."

"Could that have something to do with a certain blonde haired, blue-eyed Cheerio?" I asked, smirking.

"Aren't you supposed to be talking to Sylvester?" she asked.

"Shit, I was trying to block that out of my memory," I said. "Whatever, I wanted to talk to her anyways."

Santana's faced contorted into one of disgust. "Why? You are aware she's gonna chew you out, right?"

"Eh, she doesn't scare me much anymore."

"Bullshit. She scares all of us," she said. "Now go, before Sylvester comes out and tears you a new one in front of all of us."

I shook my head and walked to Coach's office.

"You wanted to see me, coach?" I said as I walked in.

"Sit," she said, pointing at the chair in front of her desk. I did as I was told. "I reinstated you as head Cheerio because I thought you could get the job done and lead us to another national championship, but I find myself increasingly annoyed with your lack of results."

"I know, Coach. The girls have been slacking, and-"

"No, you've been slacking. If I didn't know better, I'd say you were letting personal problems get in the way of leading my squad. Maybe I was wrong by trusting you again, Quinn."

I shook my head. "No, I can do this job, I just think there should be some changes to help us be the best."

"Fabray, I've won so many competitions and championships I could fill several vaults at a bank. I think I know what needs to be done to make us a winning team, and apparently, it isn't you."

I was nervous, but considering that I'd been planning out a similar conversation in my head the night before, I had a response.

"Coach, with all due respect, this team would be in shambles without me," I said. "Sure, you managed last year, but a lot of our best girls graduated last year, Kurt Hummel transferred, and the freshmen aren't impressive. Santana, Brittany, and I are all you've really got."

"I can still have you on the squad without having you be captain. I know how obsessed you are with being on the top. You wouldn't quit all together," she said.

"No, but you know that there isn't a girl on the Squad that could handle the head Cheerio position."

"It seems that you can't handle it anymore, either," she said.

"That's why I have a proposition for you," I said, and she looked at me, waiting for a response. Rachel was right; an audience really did respond to a dramatic pause. "Make Santana and I co-captains."

"No," she said, sitting back in her chair. "I don't need her popping her floatation devices if she falls off the pyramid."

"Coach, if you want us to win, I think the only way to do that is to split the captain duties between Santana and me. Besides, you gave me another chance."

"I'm regretting that decision now," she said, narrowing her eyes. "And you got me funding. What does she have to offer?"

"Her dad is a doctor. I'm sure that he'd be more that willing to donate money to the program. In fact, I'm sure that he could get his golf buddies to chip in some, too."

Sylvester looked at me for a long moment before speaking. "How exactly would this work?"

"I'd run the Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday practices, Santana would take Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and we'd switch off spying on other squads after the Saturday practices."

"I doubt that Lopez will even agree to this," she said.

"Trust me, she'll do it," I said. I knew better than anyone how important being at the top was to Santana.

Sue thought for a moment before calling out," Becky!" Becky came in from the room next to ours.

"Yes, Coach?"

"Get Santana Lopez in here," she said. I smiled, and she turned back to me. "This had better work. If I ever have another time where Cheerios think they can get away with missing practice, I will make sure that Figgins allows me to physically reprimand you and Santana." She started writing in her notebook. "You may go."

"Once more thing," I said before leaving. "I don't want my father to know about this."

Sue looked up at me. "Your father has asked that I inform him of every change we make to the schedule, Quinn."

"My dad is a bully, and he's trying to bully you into making him do what he thinks is best for me. If I can get some time to myself, it will only make me a better Cheerio."

Sue nodded. "I've never been very fond of your father," she said. I was glad that the people in my life that I didn't like also hated each other. "I won't tell him, but only if this works. If we don't keep winning, I'll tell him about this, and about the fact that you're still talking to Rachel Berry."

My eyes went wide. "How did you-"

"I have eyes and ears everywhere," she said. "Speaking of that, I want to make it very clear that if your 'friendship' with the midget embarrasses me or the squad in any way, I will make sure that your father knows about it, and you'll be back to where you were this year minus the baby bump, and I'll make sure that Berry's life becomes hell as well, understood?"

I clenched my fists at my sides and bit my cheek until I was almost drawing blood. "Understood."

"Good, now leave," she said, and I did before I lunged over her desk and tackled her to the ground for threatening and insulting Rachel.

God, I had it bad.

* * *

It wasn't until between second and third period that I knew Santana had heard the news. I was getting things out of my locker when the next thing I knew, it was being slammed shut in front of me.

"What the hell?" I yelled.

"What are you playing at?" Santana barked at me.

"What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb, Quinn," she said, shoving me backward. "Sylvester told me everything."

"Then why are you mad?" I asked, confused. I thought that she'd be excited about being back on top, even if she did have to share the spotlight.

"Because you _never_ give up power unless there's something in it for you. Tell me what you're setting me up for before I beat it out of you!" There was a crowd gathering, waiting for another Fabray-Lopez throw down. I couldn't explain everything in front of them, so I grabbed Santana and dragged her into an empty classroom.

"I'm not setting you up, you idiot," I said as soon as I closed the door. "This was the only way I could get alone time with Rachel."

Santana looked confused. "Wait...what?"

I sighed, deciding to explain it piece-by-piece. "Okay, what do captains have to do at Cheerios practice?"

"They get to tell everyone what to do," she said.

"Ugh! Think before and after!"

"How the fuck was I supposed to know you were talking about after?" I shot her the dirtiest look I could muster. "Fine. They have to be there before everyone else and after, unless coach says otherwise, they have to stay and put away all the equipment. Is that what you're getting at?"

"Yes. I'm going to spend that time with Rachel on the practices you run." It wasn't much time; I could probably get away with about an hour for all the practices in the afternoon, but it was better than nothing. "I figure the best days will be the Saturday spying days. Those can last all day."

"So, wait...you're doing all this...giving up power and letting me have a piece because of Berry?" I nodded. "Seriously, that girl has you wrapped around her finger."

"Well, I also did it because..." I didn't really know if I wanted to let this next part out. It could bite me in the ass. "Because I felt bad about taking your spot. You deserved it."

"I don't need your handouts, Quinn. I could've gotten that spot back on my own, y'know."

I sighed. I might as well let it all out...stupid Rachel making me learn how to share my feelings.

"Okay, I'm going to tell you this in the hopes that you don't use it against me in the future. Just remember there are things that I know about you that you don't want people to know."

"Spit it out, Fabray," she said.

"Fine." I took a deep breath. "I knew that if things kept going the way they were, you were going to end up screwing me, and probably Rachel, over in the end. This way, we both have what we want, and I don't have to lose my best friend, but if you tell anyone that, I'll deny it and out you, got it?

There was a painfully awkward lull in conversation. I didn't know if it was because Santana was trying to come up with the best insult or if she was just processing what I'd said. I briefly thought I saw a look of appreciation cross her face, but I was sure I'd imagined it.

"What the hell does Sylvester see in you?" she finally said. "You're softer than a marshmallow." I didn't say anything in response. "Whatever, Quinn. This is probably the smartest decision you've ever made. We need a captain that can actually control the team, which you obviously can't anymore, if this morning was any indication."

"Are you just gonna sit here and insult me, because I could be doing better things with my life right now."

"What, were you expecting me to fall to your feet and praise you for giving me a chance. Please, Santana Lopez doesn't play that." She walked past me towards the door. Before she left, though, she turned back around.

"What, think of another way to degrade me?" I asked.

She looked me up and down and said, "It's sad that we're best friends. Thanks for nothing, loser." With that, she was gone. I laughed. She had me fooled right up to that point. After knowing Santana for what felt like forever, I knew her well enough to know that was her subtle way of thanking me. I walked out of the classroom, shaking my head, and I almost ran into a very concerned Rachel.

"Quinn? Are you alright?" she asked. "I saw you walk in there with Santana. Did she threaten you or something?"

I laughed. "No, we just had a little chat. She and I are co-captains of the Cheerios now."

Rachel went straight into panic mode. "What? Why? Is Coach Sylvester unhappy with you? Is it my fault? I'd hate to think I was distracting you from something that's so important to you. I couldn't live with myself if I was the reason for your demotion-"

"Rachel," I said, cutting her rant off. "It's not like that. No, she wasn't happy with me, but she hasn't been happy with me since I got pregnant. And it's not a demotion. If anything, it's just a promotion for Santana, and it takes some of the load off of me." I stepped a little closer to me. It was best-friends-close, close enough that she was the only person that could hear me, but not close enough that people would put any of the pieces together. "Besides, it's freed up some time in my schedule. What are you doing this Saturday?"

Rachel smiled at me. "Nothing...so far."

"How about we go catch a movie or something? I could pick you up. I'd pay and everything," I said.

"Quinn Fabray, are you asking me out on a date?" she asked, batting her eyelashes.

I laughed. "What, I can't ask my friend out to a movie without ulterior motives?" She shook her head. "Call it whatever you want, Rach. Just as long as you come."

She smiled that signature Rachel Berry smile. "Well, I have my usual morning workout and vocal exercises. I usually get in an early ballet class around ten...I could probably be ready about one?"

"Perfect. Cheerios ends at 12:30. I'll pick you up right after."

She raised an eyebrow. "You're picking me up in your Cheerios uniform?"

I shrugged. "My dad's going to think I'm out spying with Coach. I won't have to think about changing this way."

"Okay," she said. I was surprised that she didn't even bat an eyelash at the fact that I was lying to my parents. Then I remembered her last conversation with my father, and I wasn't as shocked. "Besides, you look really hot in that uniform anyway." The bell rang for class.

"Gotta go," I said. "Will I see you at lunch, or will you be in the choir room?"

"I'd love to sit with you, but alas, I'm still trying to convince Mr. Schuester that I deserve the solo for regionals. It was nice to have a break for once, but I think that's the only one I'll need for the rest of my performing career."

"Fine, drama queen. I'll see you around," I said, hugging her before I left. Things were looking up, in a very fragile way. Yes, my dad could find out at my moment that I was still talking to Rachel, or worse, that we were in love with each other. Sue could actually be the one to tell him. Hell, I didn't completely put it past Santana to be the one to do it if we ever had a falling out. Still, for the moment, I just wanted to enjoy the fact that Rachel and I were finally going to get some time together without meddling parents or nosy peers.


	11. Date

A/N: Okay, this chapter is rather long (it's actually the second longest chapter I've ever written). Your reward for being patient with me.

* * *

I was a nervous wreck.

Its not like Rachel and I hadn't spent time together alone...but this was different. As much as I kept telling myself it wasn't really a date, it was. It was our first date, and the only time I'd never been this nervous. Seriously, not even national competitions had ever made me this nervous. I could barely focus on Cheerios practice. Santana even pulled me to the side halfway through practice.

"What the fuck is up with you?" she asked.

"Nothing," I snapped at her.

She looked me up and down. "Okay, I'm going to overlook that, because I don't feel like getting my uniform dirty while I'm shoving your face in the grass, but I need to know what's going on. You've fucked up the routine, like, four times in a row, and I can almost see the smoke coming out of Coach's ears."

I took a deep breath. "I'm going out with Rachel tonight."

Santana rolled her eyes. "Please don't tell me that's it. Please tell me you're pregnant again, or your living in your car, because Sylvester is going to kill you if she finds out this is about a date."

"It's not just a date," I said. "It's our first date, and I haven't planned it at all."

"Oh, please. Calm down. It's not like this is going to last for very long, anyways. It's not like you're in love with her." She looked at me, and I looked at the ground. "Oh my God, you are NOT in love with her! You can't be in love with her!"

"Why can't I be in love with her?" I asked.

"Because she's a girl!" she shouted at me.

"Oh please! We both know you're in love with Brittany, so you can cut the crap now, thank you." Santana opened and closed her mouth a few times. "Okay, can we get back to practice now? I think they're about to kill each other over there."

We looked over at the other Cheerios. Brittany was desperately trying to teach a few freshman some of the new stuff we'd learned that day, and they just seemed lost. The older members were staring at their nails and chatting.

"Why isn't Sue doing anything?" Santana said to me.

"I think she's testing us," I replied. "Seeing if we can actually do this whole working together thing."

"Well, then. Let's do it." Santana's face went from my best friend to HBIC in a split second, and she started yelling. "I turn around for a second and all of you stop working! Get on the goal line! I see a lot of suicides in your near future!" I laughed; to her credit, Santana was brilliant at getting the girls in line. The rest of practice went relatively smoothly, considering that all of the older girls were running under Santana's watch, while Brittany and I taught the others dance and cheer moves. When practice was finally over, Brittany pulled me aside.

"Do you think they'll ever get it?" she asked.

"Yeah, we just have to be patient. You know, we can't get frustrated." She smiled, but it looked sad. "What's wrong?"

"That's what Artie says to other people when I don't understand things. He whispers it so I won't hear, but I always do. He's not a very good whisperer."

I wanted to find Artie and punch him. "You know, you're not stupid, Britt. You're just different."

She shook her head. "That's always what you and Santana say, but I don't think anyone else thinks that. I think everyone else thinks I'm stupid."

"It's not that," I said. "Everyone else is just too stupid to get you. We get you because we've known you since we were little." I saw a tear spill out of her eye, but she wiped it away really fast.

"I'm really happy you're saying this, Quinn, but I wish it was Santana. I wish she'd talk to me. I miss her so much.

I wrapped Brittany in a hug. "Don't worry, Britt. Everything will work out."

"Fabray! Lopez! Here, now!" Coach called from the bleachers. I gave Brittany a final squeeze, then ran over to Santana.

"What did Brittany say?" she asked.

"You know, you're a fucking idiot," I said. "Why don't you talk to Brittany if you wanna know what she has to say?"

"Whatever, Quinn," she said as we got closer to Sue.

Sue just looked us both up and down and said, "I'm satisfied, for now. Lopez, meet me in the parking lot. Fabray...you can go after you put all the equipment away, but if you ever have another practice like that, you're off the squad, got me?"

"Yes, Coach," I said, even though I knew it was an empty threat. After I was done putting everything away, I practically ran to my car, not wanting to be late to pick Rachel up from her house. I looked at the clock in my car, and it read 12:58.

"Shit," I said, peeling out of the parking lot. I couldn't be late. Rachel didn't live very far, and I knew my car clock was a little ahead, so I hoped I would make it. I pulled up in front of Rachel's house, jumped out of my car, and ran to the door. Before I could even knock on the door, it opened, but it wasn't Rachel on the other side.

"Hello, Quinn," the taller Mr. Berry, Michael, said. "Fancy meeting you here."

"H-Hello, Mr. Berry," I said. I couldn't believe I'd just stuttered. I also couldn't believe that Rachel hadn't mentioned that her dads were going to be home.

"Who is it, Dad?" Rachel called out from within the house.

"It's Quinn!" he yelled back.

"Tell her I'll be a minute!" she yelled, and I could feel myself start to panic.

"Would you like to come inside?" he asked.

"I thought...aren't I banned or something?"

Mr. Berry laughed. "That was actually my husband's doing. I'll be honest; I didn't trust you at first, but I'm going to trust Rachel's judgment, here. She seems to think the world of you, so I'm going to trust that you aren't going to hurt her again."

I shook my head back and forth as fast as I could. "No, no hurting Rachel. It's actually a new rule of mine."

He laughed again. "I can see why she likes you," he said, and before I could respond, Rachel was at the door.

"Sorry I'm running late," she said. "It took me a little longer to prepare than I expected."

I tried to not audibly gulp. She was wearing a sweater that complimented her figure a lot better than the stuff she usually wore, and one of her sinfully short skirts.

"It's okay," I said, managing to not leer at her. "Cheerios ran long, anyway."

"Okay," she said. She kissed her dad on the cheek. "'Bye, Dad!"

"See you later, sweetheart," he said. "Oh, and Rachel, don't forget that your father and I won't be home until tomorrow afternoon. No crazy parties while we're gone, understood?"

She smiled at her dad. "Darn, I was planning on having a rave. Guess it'll have to wait."

He kissed her on the forehead before he went back into the house. I smiled at how affectionate they were with each other. I wished my father was more like that.

"So what're we doing today?" she asked.

"Um...well..."

"Quinn Fabray!" she exclaimed. "Please tell me that you have a plan for today!"

"Of course I have a plan! We...we can go to the movies! Remember, I said that!"

"Okay," she said. "What movie?"

"Um..." I was drawing a blank. "What movies are out right now?"

"Did you put any thought into this at all?" she asked.

"Well...I..." I didn't want to tell her the truth. The truth was that I'd been thinking about our date nonstop since I set it, but I couldn't think of anything good enough to do. Nothing I thought of seemed to be enough, and now, I was stuck without an idea.

"Quinn, if you don't want to do anything, we don't have to," she said, looking at the ground.

"No! I said that we were going to do something, and I meant it! This is the only chance we're going to get until God knows when to go out. We'll go to the movies, we'll get something to eat, then I'll drop you off back here, and go home, and we'll look back on this date in the future, and laugh at how much I suck at planning things!" Rachel flashed me a huge smile. "What?"

"So...this is a date?" she asked hopefully.

"No," I said. When she started to pout, I laughed. "Okay...maybe it is a date."

The smile was back on her face. "Okay, because I suspected that you wouldn't have anything prepared, I made a plan."

I scoffed. "What if I had made a plan?"

"Quinn, I know you pretty well. I knew you wouldn't have a plan."

I laughed. "Okay, so what's your plan, oh wise one?"

"You'll just have to see," she said. "I'll give you directions as we go."

"Fine," I said, getting in the car. She got in the passenger's side, and we were off. It took almost an hour to get where Rachel was taking me, but when we got there, I rolled my eyes.

"We're going to the carnival?" I asked. "I haven't been to one of these since I was a kid."

"Well, I knew there was one in town, and I figured it would be fun." She looked over at me. "Don't you like carnivals?"

I didn't want to tell her the truth. Sure, I liked carnival rides and cotton candy and all that, but so many carnivals had clowns...and I fucking hated clowns. I sat there, trying to figure out what to tell her.

"If you don't wanna do this," she said, looking down, "I'll understand." She looked so disappointed.

"You really wanna do this, don't you?" I asked her. She didn't have to answer. I could see it on her face. "We can go in. It'll be fun, right?"

She smiled like a little kid, and I had to hold in a laugh. "Yeah! It'll be so much fun! I promise, Quinn, this will be the best date you've ever had." I felt like she was channeling Brittany.

We went in, and immediately, Rachel was dragging me around like a little kid. Every time I laughed at her, though, she'd shoot me a death glare, but I'd grab her and hug her, and she'd stop glaring. We went on every ride before Rachel started insisting that we do some of the carnival games.

"Rachel, you do realize that we won't win anything. All these games are rigged." She punched me in the arm.

"Quinn Fabray, how did you become so jaded?" she pouted, and I knew I was going to lose this argument, yet I still continued.

"I'm not jaded! I'm just realistic. Everyone knows that these are set up so no one can win. The basketball hoops are smaller than the basketballs, the rings don't fit over the posts, and so on." She kept pouting. "Come on, Rachel. We might as well set our money on fire. Let's just ride more rides."

"We already rode all the rides!" she said. "We have to leave soon. Could you please, _please_ play a few games with me?"

I wanted to say no. I'd never seen anyone win a carnival game in my life, and although I wasn't short on cash, my parents had severely cut back how much they were giving me. It was on the tip of my tongue to tell Rachel no, but she stared at me with those big, chocolatey eyes, and I found myself nodding. She smiled, and pulled me towards one of the games.

"I knew you'd come to see things my way," she said. She led me over to some game where you had three chances to throw a ball into a cup. After trying about thirty times to get the stupid ball in, I let out a frustrated sigh.

"Okay, I'm almost absolutely sure that this ball is bigger than that cup," I said, holding one of the balls in my hands.

"Quinn, they've shown you three times, that the balls actually fit," she said, laughing at me.

"I don't care! This thing is rigged!"

Rachel just shook her head and bought three balls for herself. Her first shot bounced off the rim.

"See?" I said. "Rigged."

She just swatted at my arm and went back to focusing on the game. She stuck her tongue out of the corner of her mouth, took a deep breath, and let the ball go. Much to my complete aggravation, the ball went in. Rachel started jumping up and down, and I just stood there, mouth hanging open.

"Rigged, huh?" she said, smug smile on her face.

"Yeah...well...that was a fluke," I said, and she laughed again.

"Even if it was a fluke, which it wasn't, it still proves that the game isn't rigged."

"Whatever," I said. "You have a ball left. Do it again."

"Fine," she said, lining up a shot. I almost passed out when I saw the ball drop into the cup again. Rachel danced again, picking out a big stuffed pig out from the dolls she could get. She turned to me and said, "I have many talents."

"Yeah, like making me look like a jackass," I said, trying to keep the smile off of my face.

"Aw, sweetie, if it makes you feel better, I got the pig for you." She handed me the pig, and I smiled. I leaned in to kiss her on the cheek, but I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. The text was from my mom. I looked at my watch, and it read 5:45.

"Shit!" I said.

"What? What is it?"

"We should've left a long time ago. My dad's going to kill me if he finds out about this." I opened the text.

**Your father and I are leaving town to deal with your sister. It's an emergency. Your father still expects you to stay at home, but if you'll be somewhere else, please tell me so I know where you are. I won't tell your father.**

I raised my eyebrow at the text. My mom was actually going against my dad's wishes? I thought I was going crazy.

"What's that about?" Rachel asked.

"That was my mom. She and my dad are out of town," I said.

"So...what does that mean?" she asked.

"It means I don't have to rush home." I flashed her a smile that she was quick to return.

"Good! That means more games!"

I groaned. "Rachel, no more! Even if this game isn't fixed, the other ones probably are!"

In hindsight, I shouldn't have said that. Rachel proceeded to go to almost every game in the entire carnival and prove that it was fair. Difficult, but fair, she kept saying.

"Okay," I said after another hour and a half of games. "My ego is officially bruised."

"Oh, Quinn, they're just games. Just because you didn't win doesn't mean you have to be a poor sport."

"Rachel, I can barely carry all the stuffed animals you've won today," I said. "Speaking of that, why am I carrying all of these?"

"Because I'm giving them all to you," she said. "Besides, isn't the butch one in the relationship supposed to carry everything?"

I almost dropped my entire handful. "Excuse me? Are you implying that I'm the butch one?"

"Well...you are the one in a sport."

"I'm in cheerleading, Rachel! It's not like I'm on the rugby team!"

"You also insisted on paying for everything today." I couldn't really argue with her there. I had offered to pay, and I had said to Sam on our first date that a gentlemen always pays on the first date...even though I hadn't really wanted that to be a date.

I frowned. "I'm not the butch one, Rachel."

She laughed. "I was only teasing! Geez, and everyone thinks I'm uptight." Rachel wrapped her arm around my shoulders (which was awkward because she was shorter than me and I had an armful of stuffed pigs, but it was still nice). "Come on, I think the clown show is starting."

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Clown show?"

"Yeah! It's sort of the main event." I stopped dead in my tracks. Rachel looked at me with concern in her eyes. "Are you okay?"

I shook my head. "I don't feel well. Maybe we should go home."

"Oh...okay. Did you have a bad time today?" she asked. "I'm sorry if my competitiveness upset you. I knew that I shouldn't have let myself get carried away like that, but I love carnivals, and I love you, and I wanted the two things I love to mix, but I should've known you'd hate it here, and-"

"Rachel," I said. "It's not that I had a bad time. I've had a wonderful time, actually."

She looked at the ground. "You don't have to lie, Quinn. I'll understand if you don't want to ever go on another date with me after this."

I sighed. I had to tell her the truth, or she was going to keep putting herself down. "I'm afraid of clowns," I mumbled.

"What?" she said. "I didn't hear you."

"I said..." This was so embarrassing. "I said I'm afraid of clowns."

Rachel just looked at me like I was crazy. "I'm sorry, I thought you said you were afraid of clowns." I blushed, and she started to giggle.

"This isn't funny!" I yelled. "It's a legitimate fear!"

"I'm sorry," she said as she wiped tears out of her eyes. She'd worked herself into quite a tizzy. "It's just...clowns?" She started laughing again, and I glared at her. She started swallowing her laughter. "I'm so sorry. I've heard of that, and I'm sure that it must be awful of you, but I've never actually met anyone that was afraid of clowns."

"Yeah, well, now you have," I said. "Please don't tell anyone. Santana would have a field day with this one."

She kissed me on the cheek, and I couldn't help but smile. "Don't worry. We can leave, and if you want, you can come over to my house."

"What about your dads? I mean, I know one of them is okay with me, but the other one..."

"They won't be home, remember?" She nudged me. "Come on, we can get out of here and avoid all the scary clowns."

"It's really not funny," I said.

"I'm sorry, but when you're not used to it, it seems sort of ridiculous." We walked back to my car, me playfully glaring at Rachel the whole way while she laughed at me. By the time we got home, it was 7:00. We'd spent the entire car ride talking about fears, because I'd finally gotten sick of Rachel making fun of my clown fear (although, I'd rather have Rachel making fun of me than not talking to me at all).

"Okay, I get spiders. They're gross," she said, as we pulled into her driveway.

"I know! They've got so many legs, and they bite you, and some of them kick their legs up all creepy-like when they walk. They're just...elgh..."

Rachel laughed. "I know. I always make my dad put them outside when I see them in the house." She unlocked her door, and we walked inside.

"Wait, wait, wait," I said. "You don't kill them?"

"Well, although I don't like them, it would be rather hypocritical of me if I was vegan but was willing to kill things I didn't find cute." I looked at her like she was crazy. "What?"

"You're weird," I said. Rachel just laughed and led me to her bedroom. We both sat down on the bed, dropping into silence. It was nice being in Rachel's room again. I hadn't realized how much of a sanctuary it had become for me until I was put on house arrest.

"You know, the thing I fear the most is my parents." I hadn't expected it to actually come out of my mouth.

"Why?" Rachel asked, alarmed. "Your father doesn't hit you or anything, does he?"

"No, no it's nothing like that. I guess I fear that I'll keep letting him control me for the rest of my life. I'll let him push me into the schools and relationships that he wants me in, and I'll end up like my mom...stuck in a loveless marriage to keep up appearances."

"No, Quinn," she said. "You're stronger than that. You won't let your life become that."

"What if I'm not as strong as you think I am?" I felt a tear slide down my cheek, and she immediately wiped it away.

"Trust me. When you graduate, you'll get out of this stupid town and get away from your father, and you'll be able to live the life you want."

"I hope so," I said, laying back on her bed. We dropped back into silence before she spoke up.

"You know what I fear most?" she said, and I faced her.

"Not getting to Broadway?" I was shocked when she shook her head.

"It's not that I don't fear that. It is definitely a solid number two fear of mine, but it's not at the top of the list because I'm very confident that I have what it takes to make it in New York or wherever else I end up."

I smiled. "I'm sure you do, Rach." She blushed a little, and I smiled even bigger. "So...what's number one?"

"I'm afraid...I'm afraid I'll die alone." The smile dropped off of my face. "I fear that my personality is too strong and...irritating for most people to tolerate." I didn't know what to say.

"Rachel..." was all I managed to get out.

"I know Finn said he loved me, but I don't know how seriously I take that. I mean, he didn't even like to listen to me speak. It seemed like the only time we actually conversed with each other was when we were fighting. Puck was in love with you, and Jesse was my mother's spy." She laughed a little. "I can't believe I thought I loved him."

"I think you just liked being with someone who had similar interests for a change," I said.

She nodded. "Probably. I guess it was nice to be interested in someone that was interested in me, too...at least, he pretended to be." She took a deep breath. "Sometimes, I think it's impossible for anyone to really fall in love with me. Am I really that bad?"

I immediately sat up. "Don't you dare say that, Rachel Berry. It's not true!"

"You have to say that, Quinn. You're my friend."

"I think we're more than friends at this point, Rachel," I said.

"You know what I mean. You just said that because you want me to feel better."

"No, I said that because I'm in love with you..." The words left my mouth before I could stop that. I hadn't been ready to say that, even if it had been at the tip of my tongue for longer than I cared to admit. I didn't want to say that...if I said it out loud, it was real. All of these feelings were suddenly so real, and I found myself panicking. I felt like someone was sitting on my chest and pushing all of the air out of my lungs. I looked at Rachel, and she looked about as shocked as I felt.

"You...what?" she gasped out.

"Rachel...I...I..." I felt light headed. I was pretty sure that I'd stopped breathing after my confession, so I tried to suck in a breath, but my chest felt so tight.

"Quinn?" Rachel said, suddenly concerned. "Quinn, you need to breathe." She starting rubbing circles on my back, and it relaxed me enough to take in a proper breath. It took a couple of minutes for the dizziness to go away, but having Rachel close was really helping.

"Thank you," I said, finally feeling okay. It still didn't remove the elephant in the room.

"I don't want you to panic again," she said, "but...did you...did you..."

"Mean it?" I finished for her, and she nodded. I wished that I could take it back. I prayed for God to take this all away...take away my declaration...take away these feelings all together, but then I looked into Rachel's eyes, and I knew I had to tell her the truth. Besides, before the panic, it had actually felt incredible to finally tell her.

"Y-Yes. I meant it. I don't know how this happened, or exactly how long I've felt this way, but it's how I feel. I'm in love with you." It felt even better the second time coming out of my mouth. I tried to smile at Rachel to let her know that I really meant it, but the weight of the situation was still making it a little hard to breathe, so I focused on that. I started to worry when Rachel didn't say anything back. Maybe she hadn't been ready to hear it. "Say something, Rach."

She didn't say anything. She just lunged forward and caught me in the most heated kiss we'd ever shared. It was so different then any other time we'd kissed. It wasn't desperate like the kisses in the beginning, or sweet like a lot of our more recent kisses had been. It was heavier and more important, and I knew that Rachel could feel it, too.

She pushed me back on the bed, and I let her straddle me. She started kissing my neck and trying to pull off my Cheerios top. I sat back up so I could help her pull it off. She pulled her sweater over her head and made quick work of getting rid of both of our bras. She pushed me back down on the bed and started sucking on my right nipple.

"Jesus!" I yelled out, briefly thinking that yelling out the name of the lord while I was being fondled by a girl was probably going to get me a one-way ticket to hell. She let go of my nipple, and I gasped at the cold air that hit it. She shocked me when she flipped us over so I was on top. She started kissing me again, and she rabbed my hand and placed in on her inner thigh. I pulled back.

"Rachel?" I asked. "What's happening?"

"I want you to be my first, Quinn," she said. "I've wanted this for longer than you know, and I'm finally ready."

I looked into her eyes, trying to make sure that this wouldn't be a mistake. I didn't want to be one of her regrets.

"Are you sure, Rachel? I mean, once we do this, we can't take it back."

"Do you love me?" she asked, and I nodded. "Then yes, I'm sure."

I took a deep breath. I could feel my hands start to shake.

"I'm scared," I said.

She raised her hand to my cheek. "Quinn, if you don't want this, then we can stop. We don't have to."

I shook my head. "It's not that I don't want to. God, I really, _really_ want to. I just want your first time to be special."

She leaned forward and gave me a soft kiss. She pulled away after a moment.

"It will be special, Quinn, because it's with you."

I could feel the tears prickling at my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. I didn't want Rachel to start worrying that she'd said something wrong, so I just started tracing circles on Rachel's thigh.

"If you want me to stop at any time, just tell me, okay?" She nodded, and I slid my hand up to the waistband of her panties. I pulled them down and off quickly, before the gravity of what we were doing could hit me and make me hesitate. I slowly slid my hand up her thigh again, until my fingers came in contact with her folds. I'm not sure who moaned louder. Rachel, because I was touching her in her most intimate of places, or me, because she was so fucking wet. I traced up and down her slit a few times before settling on her clit and drawing lazy circles around it.

"Oh, fuck," she gasped out. I could barely breathe. Rachel's face as I touched her was literally taking my breath away. I started going faster, and her breath quickened. I went on doing this for a few more minutes until Rachel spoke again.

"Quinn..please...I want you inside of me." Her eyes were closed tightly shut, and she was running her hands up and down my back. I stopped rubbing her, and she grunted.

"Rachel, I need you to look at me," I said, and she slowly opened her eyes. "This might hurt. If it gets to be too much, just stop me, okay?" She nodded again, I took a deep breath, put a finger at her entrance, and slowly pushed inside. She gasped, and closed her eyes again. "You okay?"

She nodded again. "Yeah, keep going." I pulled out and pushed back in, and she moaned. "Faster."

I complied, and she started thrusting her hips, trying to push the pace even faster. I would've laughed at her eagerness if I wasn't so caught up in the moment. When I thought she'd gotten used to the feeling, I pushed in another finger. She winced a little, and I stopped.

"No, no, no, don't stop," she panted out. "I'll get used to it. Just for the love of God, don't stop."

"Are you sure?" I said.

"Please don't make me beg, Quinn." That's all I needed to hear (although, knowing that Rachel was willing to beg turned me on even more than I already was). I kept going, picking up a fast pace. I was worried that I was hurting her until I felt her nails digging into my back.

"Shit," I said. She did it again, and I was absolutely sure that I'd be sore the next day, but that actually just made it better. Soon, one of her hands left my back and went under my skirt and my underwear. I gasped.

"Rachel," I said, slowing my hand. I knew if I stopped all together, she'd just scream at me to keep going. "You don't have to do that. This is about you"

"I want to," she said. She ran her hand through my folds, and I felt a tremor go through my entire body. "I can feel you want it, too. Please, Quinn."

_Please_. When had the word please become so sexy? At that point, Rachel could've done whatever she wanted to me. I wasn't in the frame of mind to deny her anything. I nodded at her, unable to say any words. She immediately pushed two fingers into me and started rubbing my clit with her thumb. I started gasping for air. I hadn't expected her to be this good this fast. She took up a quick pace, probably trying to catch me up to where she was, but she didn't realize that I'd almost been there just watching her.

"Rachel," I moaned into her ear. "Oh God, Rachel, I love you so much!"

I felt her body start to shake under mine, and I knew she was close. It was so much harder to focus with Rachel's hand pumping in and out of me, but I knew it wasn't going to take much more for either of us. I pushed my thumb onto her clit and curled my fingers inside of her, trying to find her g-spot. When I heard her breath catch, I knew I'd found it.

"Quinn...Quinn, I'm-I'm gonna come. Fuck, I'm gonna come." She could barely speak, and it was pushing me closer to my own orgasm. A few more pushes of my hand, and Rachel went rigid under me, screaming my name as she came undone. The combination of that and the fact that I was still riding her fingers sent me over the edge right after her.

I'd never actually understood the hype about sex. My one and only time before Rachel had been with Puck, and all I remembered was pain and instant regret. I'd heard a lot of girls talk about sex with their boyfriends, and so many of their conversations were about how much their boyfriends sucked in bed. With Finn's early arrival problem and Santana's detailed description of Finn's shortcomings in the bedroom, I knew that he wasn't any good, either. I just figured that sex was only appealing because adults didn't want us doing it.

Being with Rachel completely changed that. The feeling coursing through my body, forcing moans out of my mouth and chills up and down my spine...this feeling was amazing. I wished that my first time could have been Rachel, but at the same time, I was glad she wasn't, because I may have refused to stop having sex with her until she had to forcibly remove herself from my grasp...or until I blacked out from pleasure.

When the pleasure subsided enough to where I finally stopped seeing stars, I slowly removed my fingers from her. She did the same to me, and I shivered, instantly missing the feeling of her filling me. I rolled off of her and stared at the ceiling, trying desperately to catch my breath and slow my heartbeat down. I turned onto my side and looked at Rachel. I saw a tear run down her face and hit her pillow.

"Rachel?" I asked, going back into panic mode. "Rachel, are you okay? Did I hurt you? Was I...was I not good?"

She looked over at me. "Quinn, you were...you were perfect. These are happy tears."

I wrapped her up in my arms. "Good, because I don't know what I'd do if you regretted any of that."

Rachel snuggled into me. "Was I good?" she asked.

"Are you kidding? You were amazing." I yawned, not wanting to get up. "I'm sleepy."

"You could spend the night," she said through a yawn of her own. "I like you holding me."

"Do you have anything I can sleep in?" I asked.

She shook her head. "We're staying naked."

I laughed. "Hate to break it to you, but we both still have our skirts on." She just shrugged. "Okay, I'll stay."

"Yay," she said sleepily. "By the way, I love you, too. So much." Rachel fell asleep in my arms, and I fell asleep soon after that, feeling more content with my life than I had...well, ever.

That is, until Rachel's dads got home early the next day.

* * *

A/N 2: Yes, I ended on a cliffhanger. I will try to update before you all pull out your hair. Please R&R.


	12. Caught

I should've listened to my instincts. I thought I'd heard a sound from downstairs as I woke up, and I'd thought about checking it out to find out, or hiding, or at least putting clothes on besides my skirt, but when Rachel had snuggled into me more, I'd ignored it, figuring that it was just in my imagination. I shouldn't have assumed; I should've played it safe like I always did. Then again, I hadn't been playing it safe much since all of this with Rachel had started.

So when Mr. and Mr. Berry came into Rachel's room, what they were greeted with was their young, innocent, perfect little angel naked, wrapped in the arms of a teenage mother who had spent years torturing their daughter. To say they weren't happy was the understatement of the century.

"What the hell is going on in here?" I heard the smaller Mr. Berry, David, yell from the doorway of Rachel's room. That snapped me right out of half-sleep into full consciousness, as I tried to cover myself with the blanket. Rachel did the same.

"Daddy!" Rachel yelled.

"Oh, don't you 'daddy' me! I want to know what's happening!" I was pretty sure I could see a vein popping out of his head.

"David, try to calm down a little," Michael said from behind him, although he really didn't look very happy either.

"Dad, Daddy, I can explain-"

"Well, you better get to it before I kill the both of you!" he yelled. "No, on second thought, I don't want to hear a word. Quinn, get out."

I nodded, and tried to find my clothes without exposing myself to Rachel's dads. I found my top and threw it over my head, not bothering to try and find my bra.

"No," Rachel said. "Don't throw Quinn out. Just listen to what I have to say."

"No!" David was beyond the point of rational thought. "She stole your innocence! You're too young to be doing this!"

"Daddy, almost everyone I know has already done it!" I flinched, knowing that saying that wasn't going to calm either of her fathers down.

"None of the people you know are my daughter!" David yelled.

"It's fine, Rachel. I'll leave," I said, but she grabbed my arm. At this point, I sort of wanted to go. It's not that I wanted to leave Rachel at the mercy of her fathers, but I didn't want one of them to suddenly decide that they wanted to kill me or something. David looked like he was almost there.

"Quinn, please don't leave," she said, and I knew that I couldn't say no to her. She had me wrapped around her finger.

David, though, looked furious at my decision to stay. "You are NOT welcome in this house, Quinn Fabray! I'll be calling your father and letting him know what's been going on!" I felt like he'd punched me in the stomach.

"No," I said. "Please, Mr. Berry, don't tell my dad. He'll throw me out, and I don't have anywhere else to go."

"Well, you should've thought about that before you took advantage of my daughter!"

"David!" the other Mr. Berry yelled at his husband. "Calm down!"

David turned to face his husband, lowering his voice a little. "Are you going to just let them get away with this? Rachel just threw her virginity away on a girl that's tortured her for years!"

"No, I'm not letting them get away with anything, but if Rachel's forgiven this girl, then we should, too."

"Rachel's still young and naïve and far too trusting. Quinn's probably just trying to embarrass her."

"Please, David, you're starting to sound ridiculous." I was really starting to like Michael Berry. "Rachel may be young, but she's not stupid enough to give away her virginity to someone that she doesn't trust. The two of them are obviously more serious than we realized." Michael turned to me. "Quinn, stay. I think we have some things we need to talk over. Rachel...get dressed. David, I need a word with you in private." David shot me one more look that made me sort of wish I had a shell like a turtle so I could crawl into it and hide.

"This isn't over," David said before following Michael out of the room.

Rachel and I were motionless, not knowing exactly how to react to what had just happened.

"Oh my God," I finally said. "I'm fucking dead. They're going to tell my dad, and he's going to kill me."

"They won't tell your dad," Rachel said, finally moving off of the bed and getting some fresh clothes for herself.

"Your dad just said that he was going to do just that!" I was more than freaking out. Getting pregnant was one thing, being gay was on a whole different level. I wouldn't be surprised if my dad put me in a coma.

"Yes, Daddy went a little overboard, but my dad will calm him down," she said. "He was thrown out of his house when he started dating my daddy."

"Really?" I said.

"Yeah. His parents were actually a lot like yours. You know...idiots."

I laughed a little. "So you really think that they won't say anything?"

Rachel nodded. "They usually are pretty rational when it comes to stuff like this. Although, I think that ban they had on you is probably going to stand, which I think is sort of ridiculous."

"Rachel, they just caught us together in bed...naked. I'm glad they're not lynching me." I looked at myself in the mirror, trying to smooth out my Cheerios uniform. "Ugh, I should've brought some other clothes."

"You can borrow some of mine, if you want," she said. "I'm sure I can find something that'll fit."

"No, it's fine," I said. "Somehow, I think seeing me in your clothes is going to set your dads off even more than they already are."

"Okay," she said. "Are you ready for this?"

"No," I answered honestly. "I don't think I'll ever be ready to face your dads again." I took in a deep breath. "Let's go."

We walked down the stairs, and I so desperately wanted to grab Rachel's hand, because it always calmed me down, but I didn't think that would be a good idea in this situation. When we got downstairs, both of Rachel's parents were waiting for us in the living room.

"Sit down girls," Michael said to us, and we complied.

"Opposite sides of the couch, please," David added, and we scooted apart. No one spoke for an absurd amount of time, but everyone was staring at me. Michael was looking at me with sympathy; he obviously saw a lot of himself in me. David looked like he was trying to kill me with a stare. Rachel was looking at me with concern...like she was worried I'd decide this wasn't worth it and I'd leave her.

"Okay, I'm not trying to be rude, and I really appreciate that no one has stabbed me yet, but can someone please say something?" I said. I couldn't take the attention anymore.

"Is this love?" Michael asked the pair of us. Rachel looked at me and smiled, and I smiled back.

"Yes, sir," I said. "We love each other."

"How long?" he asked.

"I don't know," I answered. "This all happened really fast. I'm sort of still trying to figure it all out."

"And yet, you had no problem sleeping with my daughter."

"David!" Michael yelled. David just kept glaring at me.

"I hadn't planned for that to happen, sir," I said. I always dropped back into sirs and ma'ams when I got nervous around adults.

"But it did," David said. "You pressured my little girl-"

"Daddy," Rachel cut in, "Quinn didn't pressure me. If anything, it was the other way around."

"You didn't pressure me, Rachel," I said, looking at her. "I wanted to."

"Okay, enough," David said. "I don't wanna hear this."

"But you need to," Rachel said. "You both do. I'm almost an adult, and I'm capable of making decisions about my life and my body."

"Rachel, I think we shouldn't say anything else," I said.

"No, it's okay, Quinn," Michael said to me. "We try to be open with each other, and although I'd rather pretend that Rachel's still four, she's right." I saw Rachel smile. "However, you weren't supposed to have anyone over while we were gone, so we've decided to ground you for a week. That means no phone, no computer unless it's for homework-"

"But Dad, I have my videos-"

"You should have thought about that before," David said. "Feel lucky that we aren't doing worse."

"As far as Quinn goes, she will be allowed to come over, but only if we're home, and only if her parents tell us directly that it's okay."

"So...never," I said, looking at the ground.

"I'm sorry, Quinn, but we're still parents, and we wouldn't appreciate it if other parents were helping Rachel disobey us."

"But Quinn's father is completely unfair!" Rachel yelled, getting to her feet. "I'll never be able to see her!"

"Rachel, I wish things could be different, but this is the only compromise that your father and I could come to."

"This isn't a compromise! This is just Daddy getting his way, because he knows the Fabrays won't ever let Quinn come over!"

"Rachel, it's fine," I said, grabbing her hand. She relaxed a little and sat back down. "We still have school."

"And Finn," she said. "He's still running interference."

"I know, but-" I felt my phone buzz on the couch next to me. It was my mom.

"I'm sorry. It's my mom," I said, walking a little bit away to answer. "Hello?"

"We'll be home in about fifteen minutes. I made your father stop for gas to give you a little time. If your not home, get home now." I heard a click, and I knew she'd hung up.

"Shit," I said under my breath.

"Excuse me?" David said.

"I'm sorry about that," I said, hoping that I wasn't making myself look even worse than I already did. "That was my mom. I need to get home before my dad finds out I was gone. I hope you understand."

"Do you need a ride?" Michael asked.

"Yeah, that would be great, actually," I said.

"Can I come?" Rachel asked.

"No, you're grounded," David said.

"David, let her come to drop off her girlfriend."

Rachel and I looked at each other. Yes, we'd declared our love for each other and had mind-blowing sex, but we still were in a gray area when it came to our relationship.

We all got in the car, minus David. I was pretty sure that he didn't come because he didn't want to see my face for a very long time. It didn't take long to get to my house, but I couldn't help the relieved sigh I let out when I saw that my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. Michael parked on the street, and Rachel walked me to my door.

"Okay," I said. "I guess I'll see you later. I'd call you, but-"

"Quinn," she said. "Last night was amazing."

I smiled. "Yeah...yeah, it was."

She leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek. "Okay, I have to go. Don't want your dad catching us on his doorstep." She turned and started walking back to her car.

"Rachel!" I called after her, and she turned to face me. "Will you be my girlfriend?" She smiled wider than I think I've ever seen her smile and nodded. Her dad honked his horn and she turned and ran to the car, waving at me as she went.

I went into my house, ran upstairs, and changed my clothes. I ran back downstairs to the couch turned on the TV and waited for my parents. Not a minute later, my parents came in the door.

"I can't believe the nerve of that girl!" my dad screamed as he walked in the door. My mom looked relieved when she saw me sitting on the couch.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Your sister..your sister...oh, I have half a mind to kill her right now!"

"Calm down, Russel," my mom said. She turned to me. "Your sister broke up with her boyfriend, and-"

"And now she's talking about transferring to a public school! I paid so much money to get her into that private academy, and now she's trying to throw it in my face!" My dad poured himself a drink. He poured one for my mom, too, but she declined...for once.

"Wait, let me get this straight; Abby's dropping out of school?"

"No," my mom said. "She's just thinking about transferring out to UCLA."

"Oh," I said. "Well, at least she'll still be in school."

My dad looked at me like I'd grown a second head. "You...what...ugh! You girls drive me crazy! I'm going up to my room to watch Glenn Beck. Don't talk to me until you realize the severity of this situation." He stormed upstairs, and I was just glad he was gone.

"Am I missing something?" I asked.

"Well, your sister broke up with Todd for another boy," she said. "A boy that...well...doesn't share the same views as your father."

"Okay..." I said, trying to get my mother to respond.

"Well, this boy is...and atheist." I started laughing. Maybe I wouldn't look so bad for being with Rachel after all. Then again, Rachel was Jewish...and a girl. "Stop laughing! Your father is extremely upset about all of this!"

"He would be," I said. "So what, is Abby an atheist now, too?"

"No, but your father fears that being around this boy will influence her. I feel that Abby is strong enough in her faith to be able to be with him and not stray, and if she does, that's her choice."

I was shocked. Who knew my mom could be so open minded?

"So I guess I should stay out of dad's way today?" I asked, and my mother nodded. "I really wish I could go out."

"Speaking of that," my mom started, "I was wondering where you went last night. You never told me."

"Oh...um..." I couldn't tell her the truth. "I went to Santana's."

My mom sighed. "I figured you'd say that. I called Santana's house last night, and her mother said the only person Santana had over last night was Brittany."

"Brittany was at Santana's last night?" That was interesting...

"Don't change the subject, Quinn. Since you weren't at Santana or Brittany's house, and I'm assuming you were at Rachel's house last night." I looked at the ground and nodded. "Honey, I know you think your father is just doing what he's doing because he's unfair, but he's trying to protect you."

"No, he's trying to protect his image," I said.

"Your father just doesn't understand you, and he's afraid that Rachel is going to lead you down a bad path." I kept looking down, so she kept talking. "I suppose that trying to keep two best friends apart just isn't going to work is it?"

"What are you saying?" I asked her, looking her in the eye.

"I'm saying...if you want to go over to Rachel's, just ask me, and as long as all your homework and chores are done, I don't see the harm in it."

"Is this a trap?" I asked, thinking this was too good to be true.

"No, sweetie, this isn't a trap. Just make sure your home before seven on school nights. Your father's schedule at work changed, so he's going to be out later from now on, and-"

I cut my mom off with a bone crushing hug. "Thank you!" I said.

"Quinn, I really like that you're hugging me, but I can't breathe." I let her go.

"Sorry," I said.

"Don't worry about it. Have you eaten?" I shook my head. "Okay, I'll make you some breakfast. How's bacon and eggs sound?" I smiled and nodded. I felt like I was living in someone else's life. I didn't know what had come over my mom, but whatever it was, I hoped it wouldn't wear off. I couldn't wait until the next day when I got to tell her that we could see each other.


	13. Brittana

A/N: Okay, so I was going to wait a few more days to update, but I'm just so happy about the whole "Brittana is on" tweet that Brad Falchuk did, and when I'm happy, I write. There's not any Faberry in this one, but there will be plenty in the next chapter, I promise. Enjoy :)

* * *

It was a rare day that my family didn't go to church on Sunday. My dad was all about appearances, and in our community, if you didn't go to church, your family was falling apart, so we went to church no matter what. The fact that my dad locked himself in his room and didn't insist that we go to church to show everyone that the Fabrays were back on track just showed how upset he was about this whole thing with my sister. I was just glad that he'd decided to stay out of the way instead of ranting and raving to my mom and me.

On top of that, my mother was going out of her way to be nice to me. I didn't know why she'd decided to do this complete turn around in personality, but I wasn't complaining. I mean, it had been ages that I'd spent this much time with my mother and she hadn't had a drink. It was actually really nice.

I was just about to ask my mom about her change of personality, when my phone started ringing. I actually took the time to look at my caller ID this time, and I saw that it was Brittany. I let it go to voicemail, but she called again a minute later, so I figured it had to be important.

"I'll be right back," I said to my mom as I walked up to my room. "Hey, Britt." There wasn't a response. "Britt? Brittany? Are you there?" Still, nothing. I was about to hang up when I heard a sigh on the other end. "Brittany? I know you're there...is something wrong?"

"I slept with Santana," she finally said. It was then that I remembered that my mom had said that Brittany was at Santana's house the night before.

"You slept with Santana?" I asked, not sure I heard right. "I thought the two of you weren't talking."

"We weren't, but I went over to her house yesterday." Brittany sounded like she was on the verge of tears. "Is there anyway that I can come over?" she asked me.

"I...I don't know. My dad's sort of on edge today," I said. "I'll ask my mom, though." I ran downstairs. "Mom, can Brittany come over for a while?"

My mom sighed. "I don't know if that's such a good idea, Quinnie."

"I know, it's just...Brittany's sort of upset right now. She needs me."

"Why doesn't go over to Santana's?" she asked.

"That's...that's not really an option," I said. My mom was quiet for a while.

"Okay, she can come over, but it's probably best if the two of you stay in your room."

I nodded. "Thanks, Mom." I put the phone back to my ear. "She said you can come over."

"Good, because I'm already outside," she said, and I had to hold back a laugh. I went to my front door and opened it, and Brittany threw herself into my arms.

"Whoa," I said, trying to keep my balance. "Let's go up to my room, yeah?"

She let me go and wiped at her eyes. "Sorry," she said as we walked up to my room. She sat on the edge of my bed, and I sat next to her.

"It's okay. Just tell me what happened."

She took a deep breath. "Well, Artie and I were hanging out yesterday after Cheerios. Everything was really fun, but then he took me to the park, just like Santana used to, and he fed the ducks with me, just like Santana did. It was weird, and I kept thinking about how much fun Artie was, but how much I missed Santana, and then he said he was in love with me."

My eyes went wide. "Love? Really?"

"Yeah, and then he looked at me like he wanted me to say it back or something, but I couldn't. I love Artie bunches. He's really nice and smart and sweet, but he isn't...he isn't..."

"Santana?" I finished for her, and she nodded. "So what happened?"

"I just smiled at him, and he sort of looked sad, but he didn't say anything else. Then I said I didn't feel good, so he took me home, and I tried to call you, but you weren't answering your house or your cell phone." I felt a little guilty that I hadn't been there for her when she needed me. "I didn't know what to do, so I went over to Santana's house and told her what happened." She stopped talking.

"So what happened then?" I asked, pretty much knowing where this was going.

"Well, I asked her what to do, and she just got quiet, so I got worried that I'd upset her or something, so I started rubbing circles on her back, because that calms her down, but then she kissed me." She looked to the ground. "And I kissed her back, and then before I knew what was happening, we were having sex, and it was like...I'd missed it, I'd known I'd missed it, but I didn't know how much until I had her again." I wiped away a few tears that she'd let slip.

"Okay, so what happened then?" Brittany shook her head. "Come on, Britt. You need to tell me."

"I...I spent the night, and this morning...this morning...I told her I'm in love with her."

"What did she do?" I didn't think that Brittany's answer was going to make me very happy.

"She...she started freaking out and saying she couldn't do this, and then she told me to leave so she could think or something." I wanted to hunt Santana down and beat her until my fists went numb. Brittany looked so hurt and broken.

_I wonder if this is how Rachel felt I ran out on her..._

"She doesn't love me," Brittany whispered out.

"She loves you," I said. "She's just an idiot."

Brittany shook her head. "This isn't fair. Artie is nice to me, and he loves me, but he treats me like I'm dumb. It's like...when we're together, he acts like I need to hold his hand to do anything, but he's still nice to me, and I should love him. Santana...she used to be nice to me, but now she just freaks out about everything, but I'm still in love with her. No matter how mean she is or how much she ignores me, I still love her. Is there something wrong with me?"

I grabbed her and hugged her. "No, Britt. There's nothing wrong with you. Your not stupid; Santana is. She's just afraid of everything." I hugged her for a while, surprised that she hadn't broken down. Brittany was surprisingly emotionally strong. A few minutes later, my mom knocked on my door.

"Yeah?" I said, and she let herself in.

"Hey, sweetie, Santana's at the door." I felt Brittany stiffen in my arms. "Is everything alright? Should I send her away?"

I shook my head and let go of Brittany. "No, I'll go talk to her."

"Okay, I'll let her in, and then leave you girls alone to talk. If you need me, I'll be in the study." She walked out of my room, shutting the door behind her.

I looked at Brittany. "Just wait here, okay?" She nodded, and I walked downstairs. Santana was in my living room, playing with a string on the hem of her shirt. "What do you have to say for yourself?" I asked her. He head snapped up to me.

She sighed. "So Brittany called you?"

"Brittany's upstairs in my room right now," I snapped at her.

"She is?" she asked, looking almost hopeful. "Can I...can I talk to her?"

"I really don't think that's a good idea," I said. "You know, I have half a mind to kick your ass right now. Do you have any idea how much you hurt her?" I said down next to her on my couch, trying not to slap her.

"I know. I fucked up-"

"No, you more than fucked up. She thinks you don't love her." I saw a tear slip from her eye. "Why did you do this again? This was your second chance. This was your chance to fix everything. Why do you have to be such a fucking idiot?" I was trying to keep my voice down so I wouldn't disturb my dad.

"Oh please, Quinn. Just because you _finally_ got things right with Berry doesn't mean that you didn't screw up just as much as I did before you got here, okay? I'm doing this for the same reason you did; religious parents and reputation. At least I didn't torture Brittany before I got in her pants." That did it; I slapped her across the face. She looked at me, shocked, rubbing her cheek. "Okay...I deserved that."

"Yeah, you did...for about a million reasons." I sighed. She really had deserved it, but everything she'd said was right. Sure, our situations weren't exactly the same, but they were very similar. In fact Santana and I had a lot more in common than I cared to admit. "So what're you gonna do?"

"I don't know," she said.

"You love her, right? Because if you don't love her, then you need to back off-"

"Of course I love her," she said. "You know that, and so should she."

"But she doesn't," I said. "She thinks you're using her. You need to tell her how you feel."

"How do I do that? At this point, even if I did tell her, she wouldn't want anything to do with me."

"Yes I would." Santana and I looked to the stairs, and Brittany was standing there, looking at us.

"Brittany," she said. "How much did you hear?"

"I heard everything." She looked at me. "Sorry, Q. I know you told me to wait, but I wanted to see her." She turned back to Santana. "Why didn't you just tell me that you loved me? It would've made everything easier."

"Britt...it's not that simple..."

"Yeah it is," she said. "You tell me you love me, I break up with Artie, we sing a duet in glee, and we're together. It's easy." Santana went to speak again, but Brittany cut her off. "I know you're scared, but I'll protect you. I know you usually protect me from everybody, but I can protect you, too. If anyone tries to slushie you, I'll get somebody to beat them up. If your parents find out and are stupid and throw you out, you can live with me. My parents won't care, and they love you."

"Brittany, we can't-"

"No, Santana, we can. I love you, and you love me. The only scary thing would be if we both loved each other and we didn't do anything about it."

Santana looked shocked, and I'm sure my face matched hers. These were the moments that I knew Brittany wasn't as stupid as everyone thought. Sure, she was simple, and she did say things that only made sense to her, but she wasn't stupid. Santana and I were just the only ones that looked past that. That's why we both loved her.

I wanted to say something..._anything_...to get Santana to do something, but she just kept standing there, staring at Brittany like she'd grown a second head. Brittany, to her credit, was being very patient with Santana. If it were me, I would've been screaming for her to say something. As it was, I almost was, but I didn't want to interfere in this thing that the two of them were having.

Santana opened and closed her mouth a few times, trying to say something, but nothing came out. Finally, she took a deep breath and walked towards Brittany.

"San, what're you-" Santana just kissed her, and I could see them both smiling into the kiss. I couldn't help but smile, too. Hey, it'd been hard seeing the two of them be all weird around each other. They went together like bread and butter. Santana finally pulled back, mumbled an "I love you," and went back to kissing her girl. I wished I didn't have to break them apart, but I heard the room upstairs open, and I went into panic mode.

"Break apart! Break apart!" I whisper-yelled, hoping they would respond. When they didn't, I physically pulled Santana away from Brittany.

"What the he-" she started to yell, but I slapped my hand over her mouth. When she figured out what was going on, she shoved me away, but didn't say anything. My dad saw us all standing there, and he frowned.

"Quinn, you didn't tell me you were having company," he said.

"Sorry, Daddy. They just sort of surprised me."

"Who are these lovely young ladies?" he asked.

"This is Santana and Brittany. They're on the Cheerios with me." I wanted to add that he'd met them about a hundred times, but I didn't think that would do any good. "They were also in the Celibacy Club with me."

"Oh," he said, smiling. Are you two also in that glee club?" They nodded, and his smile faltered a little. "Are you friends with Rachel Berry?"

Seriously, my dad's hatred of her was becoming borderline obsessive.

"Berry?" Santana said, scoffing. "No, we're not friends with her. Nobody is friends with her, especially since Quinn stopped hanging around her." I wanted to hit Santana, but she shot me a look, and I figured out what she was doing.

"Ah, I see," my dad said. "So Quinn hasn't been talking to her."

Santana shook her head. "No, I think that was temporary insanity. I mean, everyone has their crazy moments, right? It's about fixing them." I wanted to laugh. Santana Lopez knew how to get her way. If it was kids her age, her means were usually sex or violence. With adults, it was all charm and ass-kissing.

"Yes, well, I was just coming down here to check on what was going on." What he was really saying was that he wanted to make sure that Rachel wasn't there. "I'll just go back to my room. Try to keep it down, though." He went back upstairs, and all three of us let out a sigh of relief.

"You owe me, Fabray," Santana said, grabbing Brittany's hand.

"Yeah, well, I made you captain again, so I think we're even," I said, and she just rolled her eyes.

"Wait," Brittany said. "Since when are you and Rachel dating?"

My eyes went wide. "Oh my God, Brittany, I'm so sorry. I meant to tell you, but we'd always end up talking about you and Santana."

"Is that why you were always super upset when we'd talk?" I nodded. "You could've said something. Oh! Does this mean we get to go on double dates?"

"No!" Santana and I said at the same time, and Brittany frowned.

"No fair," she mumbled under her breath.

"Okay, this has been really fun and everything, but me and my girlfriend have some making up to do, so if you'll excuse us-"

"I'm not going back to your house with you," Brittany said.

Santana looked like someone had just stolen Christmas "Why not? My whole family is going out until tonight. We'd have the whole house to ourselves."

"I know you. Making up means sex, and we can't have sex again until I break up with Artie."

Santana groaned. "But Brittany-"

"No buts," she said. "You go home, and I'll meet you there."

"Why can't I just go to Artie's with you?"

"Because he'll probably be upset and say mean things to me, and I don't want you to break him," Brittany said, and Santana went to argue, but stopped and nodded instead.

"Okay, whatever, but we're getting to business the second you walk through my door, understand?" Brittany nodded, so Santana turned to face me. "Alright, I'm leaving. Try to stay safe, Quinnie." Santana walked out.

"She meant it, Quinn," Brittany said to me. "Your dad scares us, and we want you to be okay, okay?"

I laughed a little. "Okay."

Brittany hugged me. "I don't like your dad. I wish you could have mine. He's super nice."

"I wish that, too, Britt. Now go."

Brittany let me go and looked at the ground. "This isn't going to be fun, is it? I think I might cry. I think he might cry. There's gonna be a lot of crying, isn't there?"

"Hey, look at it this way. At least you'll be with Santana after it's all over."

She smiled a little. "I know. It's weird to think that we'll really be a couple, y'know? It's, like, the best kind of weird ever." She took a deep breath and let it out. "I know I'm doing the right thing, but I'm still nervous. I've never broken someone's heart before."

"Do you want me to go with? I might be able to sneak out for a while." Brittany shook her head. "You sure?"

"Yeah. I don't want you to get into any more trouble. I need to do this." She gave me another hug and walked out my door, waving as she went.

I felt emotionally exhausted. In the last, like, twelve hours, I'd declared my love to Rachel, we'd had sex, we'd gotten caught, we'd become girlfriends, my mom had done a complete 180 in her personality, Santana had declared her love for Brittany, and they'd _finally_ become a couple. I just shook my head, suddenly feeling very tired. I really wanted to call Rachel and tell her what happened, but I knew she probably didn't have her phone since she was grounded, so I decided to just go up to my room, crawl into bed, and go to sleep. My brain needed a break.

* * *

A/N 2" I just realized that I have a lot of slapping in my stories. I don't know, there's just something so...awesome about a well deserved or shocking slap. I remember being like, "Oh damn!" when Santana slapped Quinn in the season premiere...okay, I'm rambling. I'll stop now.


	14. Problems

The next two weeks went by pretty smoothly. I was at Rachel's house more than I was at my own. We hadn't really done anything serious since the night we slept together because Rachel's dads had instituted an open-door policy, but I was just glad that we got the time together. Santana and Brittany had been hanging out a lot with us, too. Brittany and Santana had decided that it was best to keep their relationship a secret for the moment so Santana's parents wouldn't find out. Rachel and I knew, and Brittany's parents knew, because Brittany had been filling her parents in on her relationship with Santana since it had started, and they really didn't care. The only other person that knew was Artie, who had been surprisingly cool about the break-up and had promised to keep Brittany and Santana's relationship under wraps.

Rachel's dads had warmed up to me. Michael was actually very friendly and always invited me to stay for dinner (although, I never could because I had to get home before my dad). David...well, David had stopped glaring at me when I walked into the house, and the passive-aggressive jabs had lessened, so I took that as a small victory. He still insisted that I call him Mr. Berry or sir, but that wasn't a big deal.

In any case, I was happy. Rachel and I were good, Santana and I were good, Brittany and I were good, and everyone was good with each other (well, except possibly Santana and Rachel, but I hadn't expected that relationship to quickly blossom). It looked like nothing could go wrong. Of course, everything went really wrong really fast. Seems like my life always worked like that; just like things looked like they were stabilizing, everything would go to shit.

It started, like many things seemed to, with a slushie. Brittany and I had just gotten out of class and were on our way to pick our girlfriends up by their lockers so we could all eat lunch together.

"I think it's cool that we're all hanging out like this," Brittany said to me as we walked. "I think Santana likes it, too."

I laughed. "Yeah, I'm not so sure about that, Britt." I started to say something else, but I heard a splash, then a bang, and then yelling.

"What the hell, Karofsky!" That voice sounded like Sam.

"Didn't you get the memo that Rachel's off limits?" That was Santana. Brittany and I looked at each other, then ran in the direction of all the noise. Sam had Karofsky pinned to a set of lockers with some help from Finn. Santana was standing near Rachel...who was covered in green corn syrup. I ran over to her.

"What the fuck happened?" I asked, looking at her.

"Karofsky's lost his damn mind!" Santana yelled.

"I haven't lost anything!" he yelled. "Berry over there is still a freak!" Sam and Finn slammed Karofsky harder against the lockers. I turned to him.

"You've already pissed everyone off enough, Dave! Just shut your mouth and walk away!" I turned back to Rachel.

"Just because you have the hots for her doesn't mean that she's not a loser! It just means you're a dyke!" My eyes went wide and I turned back to him.

"What did you just say?" I asked, trying to keep my voice even.

"Oh, don't play dumb, Fabray. I saw you and Berry at the carnival all lovey-dovey, and I see the way you guys are around each other. It's sick!"

"Shut the hell up, Karofsky!" Finn yelled in his face. "You don't even know what you're talking about!"

"What's going on?" Mr. Schuester was running towards the scene. He pulled Finn and Sam away. "David, go to the principal's office."

"What?" Karofsky yelled. "I'm the one who was pinned up against a locker by these homos!"

"What did you just say?" Sam said, taking a few steps towards Karofsky.

"You heard me. Maybe there's a reason you kept sticking up for your little boyfriend, Kurt." Sam lunged at him, but Mr. Schuester pulled him away again.

"Enough! All three of you go to the principal's office right now!" The three boys started walking, glaring at each other as they disappeared around the corner. Mr. Schuester looked at Rachel. "Did David do that?"

Rachel nodded. "Yeah, but it's fine. I still have my emergency kit. I figured this would happen sooner or later. I'm just gonna go to the bathroom and clean up."

"We'll go with her," Brittany said, and Santana and I nodded.

"Okay," Mr Schue said. "I need to go down to the office and make sure the boys made it without killing each other." He ran off, and Rachel, Santana, Brittany, and I went to the nearest bathroom. There were a few girls in the bathroom, but Santana shot them a glare, and they were all off and running.

"I can't believe that asshole," Santana said through gritted teeth. Rachel started rinsing the slushie out of her hair.

"I really appreciate everyone jumping to defend me and everything, but Karofsky's done this to me before, and I feel like we've just made a huge deal out of nothing."

"There's a social hierarchy in place for a reason, Berry," Santana said. "He can't just slushie whoever he wants!"

"Santana's mad that he hurt you, Rachel," Brittany chimed in.

"That's not what I said."

"But it's what you meant."

"He knows about us," I finally said. "He saw us at the carnival...he just told everyone that we're together."

All eyes were on me. Rachel walked over to me and put her hand in mine.

"Quinn...Quinn, are you okay?" she asked. I felt like I was going to throw up. If everyone knew, it was only a matter of time before my dad found out, and I didn't want to lose everything again. "Quinn, baby, breathe."

I could feel my mind going fuzzy from the lack of oxygen...I felt like I'd forgotten how to breathe. The next thing I knew, water was being thrown on my face, and I was lying on the bathroom floor.

"Quinn!" Rachel was shaking me, and Brittany was the one pouring water on my head. My brain felt like it was on fire.

"Ow," I said, putting my hand at the back of my head. "What happened?"

"You passed out and smacked your head pretty good," Santana said. "You alright?"

I shook my head. No, I wasn't alright. Things had been going so well, and now, everything was falling apart. I scrambled to my feet and ran out of the bathroom. I prayed that Rachel wouldn't follow me, but it seemed that none of my prayers were being answered.

"Quinn, wait!" she yelled, running after me. I didn't stop. "Quinn, please!" She caught up to me and spun me around. "Just calm down!"

I looked around the hallway. Usually during lunch, they were pretty empty, but everyone had hung around to see what was going on. They were all looking at me, whispering to each other...probably about me and Rachel and our sudden friendship and what Karofsky had said.

"Did you hear what he called me?" I said, trying to be angry and not terrified. "He called me a dyke, Rachel."

"Yeah, and then he called Sam and Finn homos. Karofsky's an idiot." It didn't matter what she said. I could see everyone's judgmental stares. The rumor mill was going to have a field day with this one...

"I'm going home," I said. "Tell Mr. Schue I got sick or something."

"Don't you think you're overreacting a little?" She was right; I was overreacting, and running would only fuel the fire more. "Look, it was a stupid jock spouting off stupid stuff that he doesn't know anything about, okay? Just come back to the bathroom so I can finish cleaning off, and we'll sort this all out." I sighed and nodded. I followed Rachel back into the bathroom. We decided that we'd go through the rest of the day like nothing happened. Rachel figured that was the only way we were going to keep from gathering even more attention.

I tried to act normal, but I couldn't help but feel like everyone was staring at me...especially when I was with Rachel. I found myself avoiding her for the rest of the day. Not enough that anyone would notice, but just enough to where she couldn't say more than two words to me. After glee club, Rachel came up to me.

"Hey, Quinn," she said. "Are you alright?" I just nodded. "Well, are you still coming over this afternoon? My daddy won't be home until later, so you won't have to take any abuse."

"No, I...I sort of have a lot of homework to do. You know, with midterms coming up and all."

"That's okay," she said. "I can help you. We can study together."

"I think it would be better if I was on my own, okay?" She looked at me and sighed.

"Please don't do this," she said.

"Don't what?" I shot back. "We don't have to spend every second of every day together."

"Why are you shutting me out?"

"Why are you being such a stalker?" I regretted it the second it came out of my mouth. Rachel looked like a kicked puppy.

"I...fine, you wanna be alone, be alone." She walked past me.

"Rachel," I said. She kept walking. "Rachel, I'm sorry." She stormed out of the room, leaving me by myself...or so I thought until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around, and it was Sam.

"It's true, isn't it?" he asked.

"What're you talking about?" I wanted to run, but I knew that would just answer his question.

"Come on, Quinn. It's why you broke up with me, right? Because you and Rachel are girlfriends."

"Rachel and I weren't together when I was with you," I said defensively.

"But you're together now?" I wanted to keep denying it, but I knew Sam wasn't going to drop this. He could really be persistent when he wanted to be. I just nodded, expecting him to be angry, but he just pulled me into a hug. I was so shocked, it took me a second to hug back. "Why didn't you just tell me? I would've been there for you, and it would've saved the both of us a lot of trouble. I would've never tried anything with you if I'd known you were gay."

"I don't know...I didn't really wanna tell anyone," I said.

He pulled away from me. "So you and Rachel are together, right?" I nodded, and he thought about that for a second. "Cool," he finally said. "You guys work in a weird way. I always thought that your hatred for her was sort of intense. I'm glad you have each other."

I looked down. "Yeah, well, she probably won't want anything to do with me after today."

"Yeah, I heard what you said." He shook his head. "That's pretty cold, Quinn."

"I know," I said. "I don't even know why I said it. I just..." I was at a loss. I really loved Rachel, but I was so afraid to lose everything again. I'd worked so hard to get it all back. O was stuck between who I was and who everyone else wanted me to be, and I didn't know which side was going to win out in the end.

"You guys are in love and stuff, right?" he asked, and I nodded. "Well, then apologize, and it should be all cool. I mean, it's not like you cheated or anything serious." Just the thought of cheating on Rachel made me sick. "Besides, I don't think anyone can stay mad at you for very long."

"Tell my dad that," I said, and Sam laughed. "So, are you mad that I sort of subconsciously used you as my beard?"

He shook his head. "Our relationship wasn't about romance; it was about popularity. I think we both knew that."

"And you won't tell anyone, right?"

He shook his head again. "No, but I think you should probably start telling people. People are gonna start talking. I mean, they sort of already have."

"I know," I said. "You know, you're a lot cooler about all this than I thought you would be."

He smiled. "Yeah, well, just because I'm not in love with you doesn't mean I don't care about you, and I take care of people I care about." I hugged him again.

"I'll see you later," I said as I walked away from him. I couldn't help but smile at what Sam had said to me. He really was a sweet guy.

I thought about driving over to Rachel's, but I didn't know if she'd want to see me. Still, I felt like I needed to set this right face-to-face, so I went to her house anyway and hoped that she wouldn't send me away. When I knocked on the door, I hadn't expected David to answer.

"Hello, Quinn," he said. "Do you have any idea why my daughter came into the house crying today?"

I swallowed. "Um...h-hello, Mr. Berry. I think...that was probably my fault. That's actually why I'm here. I needed to apologize."

"What exactly did you do?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I sort of...called her a stalker, but there's actually more to the story than that-"

"Goodbye, Quinn," he said, trying to close the door.

"Daddy!" Rachel's voice stopped him. "Do not close the door in her face!"

He stared me down, and I sort of felt like I was going to melt. "Come in, Quinn," he finally said, and I walked in.

Rachel grabbed my hand, and I felt a little relief wash over me. "Come on, we'll go up to my room."

"Leave the door open!" he called after us. We went into Rachel's room and she sat on the bed. I stood in front of her and took a few deep breaths.

"Did you have something you wanted to tell me, or was your plan to hyperventilate until you pass out again?"

I took one more breath and started talking. "I'm so sorry about what I said. You're not a stalker. If anything, I'm a stalker, seeing as I watch you all day just to see you nibble on your pencil or bite your lip or whatever. The point is, I love you, and I'm sorry, this whole thing just freaked me out. I mean, he called me a dyke, Rachel. I've never been called anything like that before. Preggers didn't hurt nearly that much, and now everyone's gonna know. There just gonna watch us and they're gonna know, even if Karofsky isn't the most reliable source, and anyway-"

"Quinn," she said, standing up and putting her hands on my cheeks. "I understand, and I forgive you." She gave me a sweet kiss.

"How can you forgive me like that? How do you always just forgive me for everything?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I've always been a pretty forgiving person, and I love you, so it's easy. Besides, you were scared. It's understandable. Just...don't do it again."

I just shook my head. How had I gotten lucky enough for Rachel to fall for me? "I'm sorry about the rambling," I said. "You were just so hurt, and seeing your dad didn't help. I thought he wasn't supposed to home."

"He wasn't, but his meeting got moved, so he got home early. I would've texted you to warn you, but I didn't think you were coming over. Sorry about that."

"It's not your fault." I sat down next to her. "So...are we okay?" I asked, and she nodded. I smiled and leaned in to kiss her. Before it could get heavy, though, she pulled away.

"I'd really love for this to continue, but my door is, unfortunately, open, and I don't want my daddy to kill you."

I laughed, and I was about to lean in to kiss her again anyway, but my phone rang. It was Santana.

"Hello?" I said.

"Hey, Quinn. It's Brittany."

I raised an eyebrow. "Why are you calling on Santana's phone?"

"Um...well..." I heard a crash in the background.

"Is everything alright?" I asked.

"What's going on?" Rachel asked.

"Hold up, Britt. I'm putting you on speaker." I pulled the phone away from my ear and put it on Rachel's bed. "Okay, tell me what's going on."

"Is Rachel there?" she asked.

"Yes," Rachel replied. "Hi, Brittany."

"Hi, Rachel! How're you?"

"Britt," I said. "Seriously, I keep hearing yelling and stuff. Is that Santana?"

I heard Brittany sigh. "Yeah. That's actually why I called. I would've used my phone, but San broke mine on accident, she promised to buy me a new one." She stopped talking.

"Okay...so why did you call, and why is Santana having a meltdown?"

"I sort of don't wanna tell you. I don't want you breaking Rachel's phone." I sighed. My patience was really running thin.

"I promise not to break anything," I said. "Just tell me."

There was a long silence on the phone and I was just about to drive over to Santana's house, but Brittany finally started talking.

"Jacob posted some stuff about us on his blog. You should probably read it yourself."

Rachel ran over and got her laptop out. It only took a few seconds to pull up Jacob's blog. Right there, right on the front page was the article in question.

**McKinley Suddenly Overrun With Lesbians!**

**Rumor has it that the new friendship between Quinn Fabray and Rachel Berry was not, in fact, a plot to further embarrass the diva, as initially reported a few months ago, but a cover for a lesbian relationship. The pair have been nearly inseparable for months, now, and it has been confirmed by David Karofsky of the hockey and football team of McKinley that the two were on a date at an out-of-town carnival.**

**In addition to this, it seems that long time will-they-won't-they couple Santana Lopez and Brittany Pierce started officially dating shortly after Pierce's break-up with wheelchair-bound football player, Artie Abrams. The two were seen making out under the bleachers, and this reporter overheard the pair talking about future double-dates with Fabray and Berry.**

I couldn't read anymore. I could feel my entire body being overcome with fear and anger. I should've known Jewfro would write something on his stupid blog...which, unfortunately, everyone at our school read.

"Did you read what that little fucker wrote?" It was Santana on the phone. I didn't say anything, and fortunately, I didn't have to, because Santana started ranting. "I can't believe this! Oh, he is _so _dead when we get to school tomorrow!"

"Killing him won't do you any good, Santana," Rachel said beside me.

"Oh the hell it won't!" she yelled. "It'll show everyone that you don't fuck with Santana Lopez! I mean, come on, he can't be allowed to live after this!"

"No killing," Brittany said.

"She's right," Rachel agreed. "We need to figure out what we're going to do about this. Why don't you two come over. Just don't break anything."

"No promises," Santana said, then she hung up. There was a long silence before Rachel spoke up.

"Are you breathing, because I don't want you passing out again," she said. I knew she was trying to get me to smile, and it almost worked, but then I thought about my parents and what they were gonna do if...when...they found out about all of this. "Look, when Santana and Brittany show up, we'll figure something out, okay?"

I just nodded, afraid that if I opened my mouth I might start crying or yelling or something that would just worry Rachel. I knew that Rachel thought everything was going to be okay, but I wasn't so naïve. I was going to be outed...we all were, and there wasn't a damn thing we could do about it.


	15. Decisions

A/N: I re-wrote this chapter about a hundred times, all with vastly different endings, so it's probably going to feel sort of choppy and spastic. I'm sorry, and I promise the next one will be better. I just had to push through writer's block and get something written. Hopefully, it isn't too bad. Enjoy.

* * *

It wasn't long before there was a knock at Rachel's door.

"Come in," she called out, and Santana and Brittany walked in.

"Hey, Rachel," Brittany said. Rachel smiled at her. "Your dad let us in." She looked at me. "Hey, Quinn," she said, but I didn't say anything back. "Is she okay?"

"She isn't really talking at the moment," Rachel said. "I think she's in shock."

"Well she needs to suck it the hell up," Santana barked out. "We have a murder to plan."

I really hated it when people talked about me like I wasn't sitting in the room, but I couldn't really blame them. I hadn't really said anything since I read Jacob's blog.

"Calm down, Santana," Rachel said. "She's got more to lose than the rest of us."

"Speak for yourself, midget. Just because your parents are waving pride flags doesn't mean that all of ours are. My parents are gonna flip their shit just as much as hers are!"

Rachel sighed. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you, but-"

"Yeah, well, you did!" Santana was pissed off in that way that scared most people, but just told me that she was afraid. "You know, we didn't have any of these problems before you started hanging around us! Britt and I were just fine-"

"Oh, please," I finally said. "Britt was dating Artie, and you were fucking miserable. This has nothing to do with Rachel."

"No, Quinn, this has everything to do with Rachel," she spat out. "If you two weren't hanging all over each other, nobody would suspect a thing. You're the ones that got caught out on a date!"

"Well you're the ones who were stupid enough to talk about dates! I mean, I'd expect a dumb move like that from Brittany, but not you. You're supposed to be the smart one!" I knew I wasn't being fair; Brittany was my friend, and she didn't deserved to be dragged into this fight, but Santana had started taking swings at Rachel, and all logical thought went out the window.

Of course, Santana grabbed me and pulled me to my feet, fury in her eyes. She kept holding onto me, but I pushed her away.

"Don't say another thing about Brittany, you got me?" She stepped right into my face. "Just because you and Manhands couldn't keep it under wraps-"

I shoved Santana back. "Stop calling her that, Santana!"

"Make me, bitch," she said while she shoved me back. The next thing I knew, we were on the ground, wrestling with each other while Rachel and Brittany were yelling at us to stop. Santana got a hold of my hair, and I was digging my nails into her arms. Finally, Brittany got a hold of Santana and pulled her away from me, and Rachel put herself between the two of us when we were back on our feet. When Santana tried to take a swing at me over Rachel's shoulder, Brittany tightened her grip on her and Rachel pushed me farther away.

"Stop!" Rachel yelled. "What good is this doing us? I know you're both scared, but fighting with each other is only going to make everything worse!"

"She's right," Brittany said. "You guys aren't even mad at each other. You're just freaking out." Brittany started kissing Santana's neck, and I wanted to gag, but it was working to calm Santana, so I just rolled my eyes. Rachel stepped up to me.

"You need to be the mature one. Santana flies off the handle over everything, and you know that." I started to try to defend myself, but Rachel just held her hand up. "We have enough to worry about without you and Santana at each other's throats. Just calm down, okay?" I took a deep breath and nodded. Rachel gave me a peck and smiled at me. I looked over her shoulder, and Brittany and Santana were in the middle of a pretty heavy make-out session.

Typical.

I cleared my throat, but that didn't really slow them down at all. I started snapping, but that didn't do anything. Finally, I started clapping and yelling, "Hey!" Brittany pulled away and Santana turned to face me. I expected her to yell at me or something, but she didn't.

"Sorry, Q," she said, then she turned to Rachel. "And sorry to you, too, Berry."

I smirked. "I really wish we could've recorded that. Not often I sorry come out of Santana Lopez's mouth." Everyone in the room glared at me. "Okay, fine, I'm sorry to you guys, too.

"Good," Rachel said. "Now that that's settled, we can get on to the real issue here."

"I still say we should kill him," Santana said. We all shook our heads in response. "Fine, does anyone else have any bright ideas?"

"I think we should just let it blow over," Rachel said. "It's not like anyone takes what Jacob says seriously, anyway. Sure, there might be some gossip for a little while, but it'll pass as soon as the next big scandal breaks."

"Rachel, this isn't just any scandal," I said. "We live in a small, close-minded town. Being gay isn't going to blow over like cheating or any other stupid high school drama would."

"She's right," Santana said. "Plus, any drama that has to deal with the top of the social ladder is always bigger news. Especially when it's tearing down those of us on top. I should know; I ruined Quinn's rep, and she ruined mine, and people still talk about it."

Rachel sat down on her bed. "Okay, so I'm guessing that's not an option."

"We could get boyfriends," Brittany said. We all looked at her like she'd grown another head. "I mean, not real boyfriends, because San and I aren't seeing boys because we're together, and Rachel and Quinn are gay, but fake boyfriends. Like so people will think, 'They can't be gay. They have boyfriends.'"

I thought about it for a few minutes. It was actually the best idea any of us had come up with so far.

"You know," I said, "Sam knows about us, and he seemed okay with it. I could probably talk him into being my beard."

"Yeah," Brittany said. "I bet Artie would be cool with it, too."

"No!" Rachel and Santana yelled at the same time.

"I'm not letting Wheels be your beard," Santana snapped out.

"I feel like this is a really terrible idea," Rachel said at the same time.

"Look, guys, I know this isn't how we wanted things to be, but it seems like the only way." Rachel looked like she was about to throw up. "It's not like we'd do anything with them."

"What exactly would this entail?" Rachel asked after a minute.

"Well...I figure we'll have to hang out with them at school...hold hands...maybe quick pecks here and there-"

"No. Not happening. There is NO way I'm letting Britt kiss him after everything!" Santana yelled.

"It's not like I'd like it, San," Britt said. "It would just be for show."

Rachel got my attention. "Let me ask you something," she said.

"Go ahead."

"How would you like it if I got back together with Finn?" I was about to argue, but she cut me off for the thousandth time that day. "It would just be for show, but you'd still have to see me hug and kiss and act all lovey-dovey around him. Would you be able to handle it?"

"I...I...that's not the same. Finn's in love with you. Sam was just using me for popularity."

"Fine. What about Puck? He wasn't in love with me. Would you want to see me with him everyday?"

I knew where she was going with this, and I wanted to argue, but I couldn't. It would kill me to see her with some other guy...kissing some other guy, even if it didn't mean anything.

"Fine. We won't do it. What else have we got?" The room went silent. "Come on, we have to think of something."

"Well...we could always come out," Brittany said. "People at school already know, and our parents might not ever find out."

"No," Santana shook her head. "That can't happen."

"Doesn't everyone already know about you and Brittany anyways?" Rachel asked. "I thought it was common knowledge."

"It's one thing for everyone to think we hook up for guys or when we're bored. That's hot to guys. It stops being hot when it gets serious. We really need to think of something better than this stuff, guys."

It was weird seeing Santana like this. She was pacing and wringing her hands together. She looked like she was on the verge of tears. It made sense; sure, Santana had been knocked down a few pegs in the past, but she'd never lost everything like I had before. I saw that look of fear and terror in her eyes, and I wondered if I looked the same way when I'd been pregnant and Finn had told my parents about it. I wondered if I looked the same way now.

It was weird how similar Santana and I were.

"I'm out of ideas," Brittany said. "San, maybe you should sit down."

"No," Santana grunted out.

"San, please-"

"No, Brittany!" she shouted, shocking all of us. Santana never yelled at Brittany. The next thing we knew, Brittany stood up and walked out of the room. "Brittany...Brittany, wait!" Santana chased after her girlfriend, and I heard the front door open and shut, leaving Rachel and I standing in her room.

"Well, I'm glad we figured everything out," Rachel said, laying down on her bed. "Are you okay?"

"You've been asking me that a lot, lately," I said, sitting by her. "I wish I could say yes."

"I still think this isn't as big of a deal as you're making it out to be," Rachel said. "Brittany's right. Even if everyone does believe what Jacob said, there's not much of a chance of your parents finding out."

"But what if they do?" I asked.

"I'm sure I'll be able to talk my fathers into letting you stay here."

I shook my head. "I already feel like I'm tearing your family apart. You fight with your dads, they fight with each other, your dad fights with me-"

"Stop it," she said, sitting up and putting a hand on my cheek. "Yes, my daddy is being a little bit...irrational at the moment, but he'll come to his senses if you need a place to stay."

"What about San?" I asked.

"You know she'll stay with Brittany. It's not like their little fight is going to last more than five minutes. In fact, they're probably having make-up sex as we speak."

"Ew," I said as that mental image crossed my mind. Rachel just laughed at me.

"Look, I know you two are scared. You have every right to be, but we'll get through this, okay?"

"Do you wanna come out, or something?" I said, because I didn't want her to know that I didn't think this was going to be okay.

She looked down at her lap. "Well...it would be nice to hold your hand in public, I suppose."

My eyes went wide. "You want everyone to know, don't you?"

"Well, don't you? I mean, are you ashamed of me?"

I rolled my eyes. "You know that's not what this is about," I said.

"I know, I'm sorry. I just...I understand why you wanna stay a secret, but I can't help it if I want everyone to know how happy you make me." She smiled at me. "Look, that's not important. We'll just play it by ear, okay?"

I just nodded, trying to stay calm, but failing miserably.

To say the next day at school was a disaster would be the understatement of the century. Santana, Brittany and I had morning Cheerios practice. Of course, the drama started there. The seniors decided that they didn't want to cooperate, which wasn't anything new, but it was worse than usual. When one of the girls actually knocked Santana over during a run-through of our newest routine, all hell broke loose.

"What the hell was that?" Santana yelled, jumping to her feet.

"Maybe you should watch where you're going," the other girl, Stephanie, snapped back. Santana looked livid.

"Oh, okay, you wanna be a wise ass? Maybe you won't be so smart if you spend the rest of practice licking the dirt off my shoes!"

"Oh, I bet you would like me to lick you, Santana." Stephanie got high-fives form a bunch of the other seniors.

"Shut your fucking mouth!" Santana yelled, shoving Stephanie back, When Stephanie looked like she was going to charge back, I stepped between them, but she kept yelling over my shoulder.

"Oh yeah, that was a great comeback, Lopez. I'd expect something like that from your stupid girlfriend, but not from you."

I cringed. I knew there wasn't going to be much I could do to hold back Santana from killing Stephanie on the spot. Luckily for me, Brittany ran over and wrapped her arms around Santana's waist to help me. It only helped a little, though, because Santana was in a blind rage.

"You fucking whore! I will rip you apart!" Because Santana was being held back by the two of us (and a few freshman who, thank God, actually respected us), Stephanie felt safe, and started laughing along with all of her friends.

"Yeah, sure you will. Why don't you three just go have an orgy somewhere while those of us with real talent run practice," she said.

"Seriously are you stupid? Just shut up!" I yelled. "You're lucky to even be on the squad, considering you can't dance to save your life!" I knew I should really be trying to diffuse the situation, but this girl really thought she was tough shit, and she needed to be taken down a few pegs.

"You're lucky to be on the squad, considering you're lezzing it up with Treasure Trail!" she yelled back. "Then again, I guess you're not really gay, since we all know Ru Paul's hiding a dick."

If you asked me what happened after that, I wouldn't quite be able to tell you. I know there were some punches being thrown, and I sort of remember Sue screaming something about us all being disgraces...or something. Anyway, I know that I ended up in the nurse's office briefly, then the principal's office, also briefly (Cheerios never get any punishment outside of what Sue gives to us), then I remember Santana, Brittany, and I walking to our lockers, late for class because of the brawl.

"I still can't believe that she managed to get a lick in," Santana mumbled. Her lip was split open. Apparently, Stephanie had caught her in the face with her elbow.

"It's okay, San. You did a lot worse to her," Brittany said, smiling. She didn't have a mark on her. I wasn't surprised; Santana never would've let Brittany get hurt in all of that. "Besides, you look kind of sexy roughed up like that."

Santana smirked, then winced at the pain that brought on. "You don't look like you were so lucky, Fabray."

I hadn't looked at myself yet, but I could feel everything. I had a few scrapes here and there on my arms, but it was mostly my eye. I just sighed and shook my head.

"I'm going to class and ignoring the fact that any of that happened," I groaned out. "We really need to not let stuff like that get to us, okay?" They both nodded, so I grabbed my books, and went to class. When I walked in, all eyes were on me, and I felt like crawling into a hole somewhere and dying. I just sat down and looked straight forward, trying to ignore the look of worry on Rachel's face.

When class finally ended, Rachel immediately walked over to me and put her hand on my face. A few people walking by snickered, and I just rolled my eyes.

"What happened?" she asked. I grabbed her hand and pulled it away from my face.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

"Quinn, your eye's almost swollen shut," she said. "Just tell me-"

"Rachel, I really appreciate that you're worried about me, and I don't want you to think that I'm shutting you out or anything, but I don't wanna talk about this, okay?"

"Okay, I understand," she said. She stepped closer to me so no one would hear. "Do you want me to back off for today? Maybe it'll make things less suspicious." I could see how much it pained her just to suggest that.

I shook my head. "No, I don't think there's much we can do at this point. We just need to...act normal, or whatever. Try to act like nothing's different."

"Okay, well, then, I guess we should go to our lockers then," she said, and we walked out of the classroom. I felt like the entire student body was staring at me, judging my every move. This was worse than the pregnancy. At least after I had Beth and the extra weight was gone, I could pretend it never happened.

Of course, my day took a turn for the even worse when I saw a very angry Finn Hudson walking towards us.

"It isn't true," he said, looking at Rachel. "You wouldn't hurt me like this. Quinn would, but not you."

"Finn," she said. "Please don't make a scene."

"Just tell me it isn't true, Rachel, and I'll go away. Tell me that it's just Karofsky mouthing off and Jacob trying to blackmail you into giving him more underwear." I saw the blush rise on Rachel's cheeks, so I decided to step in.

"Just leave her alone, Finn," I said. "We're having a hard enough time as it is."

He ignored me. "Everything will end if you just tell everyone that it isn't true, and that you're still in love with me, and we're getting back together soon."

"Please, Finn," she said, but he kept going.

"Look, I know I screwed up, but we're meant to be together. You needed time, and I gave it to you, so let's get back together now. I'm sorry."

"I don't think this is the way to do this," I said.

"Shut up!" he yelled at me. "You're the reason this all happened! I bet you paid Karofsky to slushie Rachel and say all that stuff."

"Why would I want Karofsky to say I'm gay?" I knew we were gathering attention, and I just wished that Finn could've done this in private. "That doesn't even make any sense!"

"No, what doesn't make sense is anyone believing Rachel's gay when she's in love with me!"

"I'm not in love with you, Finn," she said. "Please, just leave this alone." Rachel was on the verge of tears. I went to hug her, but Finn started yelling.

"Don't do that! Don't hug her like you care about her, because you don't!"

"Yes I do!" I screamed back. "I care about her more than you do!" I went to hug her again, but Finn wedged himself between us. Finn started quietly talking to Rachel, and I was about to interrupt when I got distracted by the crowd dissipating. I would've been relieved if I hadn't heard the sound of yelling. Everyone, including Finn, Rachel, and me, went over to the new source of commotion. I was shocked by what I saw.

Brittany was being held back by Sam, Azimio was lying on the ground holding his crotch, and Santana was covered in grape slushie.

I pushed my way through the crowd and got to Sam. "What happened?"

"Azimio cornered Santana and slushied her, and Brittany started beating the shit out of him," Sam explained, still struggling to hold Brittany. "You think you could help me out, here?"

I looked at Brittany. "Hey, calm down," I said, but it didn't really do anything. "Britt, you're gonna get yourself in trouble!"

"I don't care!" I'd never seen things like this. Brittany was more pissed off than I ever remembered her being, and Rachel was comforting Santana, who was covered in purple corn syrup and on the verge of tears. "Let me go!"

"You're fucking crazy!" Azimio yelled from the floor.

"Dude, just shut up!" Sam yelled. "She already kneed you in the balls!"

Azimio got back to his feet and kept fighting "Lucky shot!"

Brittany growled and got out of Sam's grasp and dodged me so she could get back at Azimio, but luckily, Santana stepped between them and stopped Brittany in her tracks.

"Britt, it's okay," she said.

"No, it's not!" she yelled, then stepped closer to Santana and spoke in a lower voice. "I promised I'd protect you."

A tear actually escaped Santana's eye, and it would've been a really touching moment if it Karofsky hadn't walked up at that exact moment.

"Aw, look at the little dykes," he said. "Come over here, and I'll show you what a real man's like."

Sam grabbed Karofsky and threw him against some lockers. I briefly wondered why we hadn't caught the attention of any teachers yet, then I remembered how incompetent the staff at McKinley was, and I just sighed. This really wasn't going to end well.

"Aw, what's a matter, Evans?" Azimio said, pulling Sam away from his friend. "Getting pissy about being Quinn's gay beard?"

"Shut the fuck up!" Sam said.

"Yeah!" Finn chimed in joining Sam. "They're not even gay!"

"Open your eyes, Hudson," Karofsky said. "Rachel and Quinn wouldn't even touch you when you dated them."

"They were probably too busy touching each other," Azimio added, earning him a high-five from Karofsky before he was tackled to the ground by Finn. While all this was going on, Rachel had managed to sneak off with Santana. I grabbed Brittany.

"What're you doing?" she said.

"San and Rachel probably went to the bathroom. I'm gonna find them, and I didn't wanna leave you alone. Besides, Santana would kill me if I let you get hurt in all of that." Brittany just nodded and followed me. Just like I thought, they were in the bathroom the furthest away from all the drama. Rachel was helping Santana rinse out her hair in the sink. Brittany ran over to them and immediately took the job from Rachel. Rachel walked over to me.

"What's going on out there?" she asked.

"When we took off, the boys were in the middle of a testosterone battle," I replied.

"It's not like we're any better. You and Santana got in a fight with your squad, and Brittany was about to kill Azimio."

"He hurt Santana," Britt said as she helped Santana dry her hair.

I sighed. "What're we supposed to do?" I asked. "We can't go on like this. One of us is gonna get suspended or hurt."

"Hurt worse than we already are," Santana said, pointing at her lip. "Let's face it; we can't hide this."

"She's right. The best thing we can do is tell the truth and hope that the school board backs us up. They can't ignore the increase of violence towards us...well, towards the three of you. This isn't really very new to me," Rachel rambled out. "Plus, if we come out, I'm sure the boys...well, maybe not Finn, but the rest of the boys will help protect us."

"I...I don't know," I mumbled.

"Face it, Q," Santana said. "This won't blow over until we tell the truth. We'll just have to cross our fingers and hope our parents don't find out."

I didn't want this to happen, but it had to. Santana and Rachel were right. If we denied it, it would stay gossip. If we just told everyone, sure, things would be rough for a while, but it would be more likely to blow over in the long run. I'd have to find Jacob later and kill him myself for making us all go through this, but for the moment, I had to make a decision.

"Okay...we'll come out."


	16. Glee

A/N: Sorry this took so long! I've actually had it done for a while, but my computer broke, and I had to get it fixed up. Enjoy!

* * *

Well, the decision had been made, but as the four of us left that bathroom, it occurred to me that I didn't have any idea how to do this. It's not like we could make an announcement over the PA system, and making out in the hallways was tacky (and WAY too big a step for me). I finally decided that the best way to do this was to tell the glee club. At least then we would have some support for when things inevitably went badly.

Luckily, the rest of the day went by pretty smoothly, considering that Azimio and Karofsky had been sent home for the day. I could still hear the whispers as I walked by, but they were already getting easier to ignore.

Glee club rolled around, and I was the first one there. Well, the first one besides Rachel. She was sitting at the piano, hitting random keys, and I couldn't help but be reminded of the day that started all of this.

"Hey," I said, walking up to her with a smile. She turned towards me and smiled back.

"Hi. How're you holding up?"

"I'm alright. At least this scandal isn't gonna make me fat." I laughed a little.

"Why don't you ever talk about that?" she asked. "You always say stuff about how the pregnancy affected your body and everything, but you never talk about Be-"

"Please don't say her name," I said. I hadn't expected her to talk about this right now.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just...I was just wondering."

I took a deep breath. This wasn't exactly the right time to have this talk, considering that we had an entirely different and just as important issue to deal with, but I didn't know if there would ever be a right time.

"I think about her a lot," I said. "Less lately, because of everything that's been happening with us, but she's still there, in my thoughts. I'm constantly wondering if I made the right decision by giving her up, but I know it's selfish. If I'd kept her, it would've ruined both of our lives, but I can't help but wish she was with me. I mean...she's my child."

Rachel nodded. "I understand. If it's any consolation, I think you made the right decision."

I smiled at her. "I guess...I guess I talk about all the physical stuff because I so desperately wanna talk about her, but I don't wanna really...talk about her. God, that doesn't make any sense."

"Actually, it does." She stood up and walked over to me. "Just know that you can talk to me about it, okay?"

I nodded. "Okay...but not right now. There's too much other stuff going on."

"I know. I don't know what to do about that, though." She ran a hand through her hair. "I figured we'd tell the club first."

I nodded, but before I could say anything, people started filing into the room, looking at Rachel and me. Rachel went to sit down in the front row, and I sat next to her. Santana and Brittany came in and sat next to us.

"I'm really not into this whole sitting in the front row thing," Santana whispered in my ear.

"Then why are you?" I said back with a smile.

"I figured you'd wanna tell the club first, right? Might as well do it all together."

"It's weird how much we're joined at the hip, S." It really was. We, along with Rachel and Brittany, did everything together.

"Yeah, I know. Weird, considering that a few months ago I was planning how I could kill you without getting caught." I raised an eyebrow at her. "Hey, you were the reason I was at the bottom of the pyramid."

I laughed a little, but I got cut off by a very flustered Finn Hudson storming into the room. He walked up to Rachel.

"Okay, I'm gonna ask you this one more time, and this time, I want an answer. I almost got suspended because of all the stuff that happened this morning while I was defending you, so I deserve to know that truth." He took a deep breath. "Are you dating Quinn?" Rachel looked at him, then me, then the ground.

"Yes," she finally said. I heard the gasp from the half of the club that didn't already know.

"How long?" he asked. When she didn't answer, he got angrier. "Did you cheat on me with her, too?"

Her head snapped up. "No! What happened with Noah was stupid and just to hurt you, and I really am sorry about that."

"Then how long?" he asked again.

She sighed. "Officially? Since about two weeks ago."

"Unofficially?" he snapped out. I wanted to step between them because I could tell how much this was bothering her, but I didn't wanna make things worse.

"Since right after sectionals." Another gasp rang out around the room.

"But...but..." Finn looked at me. "You were still dating Sam!" I started to say something, but he cut me off. "Oh, wait, why am I surprised? Once a cheater, always a cheater."

"Hey, lay off," Sam said to Finn from his seat. "She made a mistake."

"Why aren't you freaking out?" Finn asked.

"Because I knew," he said.

"You...you knew? You knew and you didn't tell me?" Finn looked so confused, and I felt a little bad for him. I would've felt worse if he wasn't being a total jackass.

"It wasn't my secret to tell. Besides, it's not like you and Rachel were together. Besides, it just wasn't that big of a deal to me." Seriously, I wanted to kiss Sam a little bit.

"What, did everybody know besides me?" Everyone shook their heads except for Artie.

"Well, I knew, but that was only because Brittany sort of let it slip when she was telling me about her and Santana getting together." The room was silent for a second before Santana spoke up.

"What, we don't get a reaction?" she asked the room.

"Sorry," Tina said. "We all sort of already figured. You're always all over each other."

"True, and there was that time that Britt let slip that you two were sleeping together when we were on the conference call," Mercedes added. "I don't think it was as obvious to people outside of the club."

"It was only a matter of time. I mean, I'm pretty sure you've said her name a few times during sex," Puck said. Brittany smiled and Santana blushed a little.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" Santana asked him.

Puck shrugged. "I thought it was sorta hot."

"Not the point here!" Finn yelled. "You two hated each other! How did you...how did _this_...just, how?"

"I don't know," Rachel said. "I've had feelings for Quinn for quite some time, and we-"

"So how long have you had feelings for her?" he snapped out, and I was on my feet.

"Okay, if you want her to answer your questions, let her finish a fucking sentence, and stop yelling."

"I never thought you'd sink this low," Finn said to me. "You've played some pretty sick mind games, but using Rachel like this-"

"Oh, get over yourself, Finn," I snapped out, about two seconds from losing my cool. "This isn't about you. It was never about you."

Finn looked around me. "How long have you had feelings for her?"

"Hey!" I said, getting his attention again. "I was talking to you!"

"Yeah, well I wasn't talking to you," he said, then went back to Rachel. "Just answer the question."

"I...I don't want to," she said.

"There," I said. "That's all you're getting."

"Again, I'm talking to Rachel," he snapped out.

"Yeah, well, I'm not gonna let you harass my girlfriend anymore."

"Quinn," I heard Rachel say from behind me. "Don't."

"There, see?" Finn started talking again. "She doesn't want you sticking up for her. She doesn't want you around."

"That's not even close to what she said, but I'm not surprised you got it wrong, considering that you never listened to her the entire time you were dating."

"Guys, please, stop," Rachel said again.

"Just answer the question, Rachel," Finn said. "You owe me that."

"She doesn't owe you anything!" I yelled.

"Rachel just tell me!"

"Fine!" Rachel yelled. "Freshman year! Are you satisfied now?"

It was like time stopped. I turned around and looked at Rachel, and I felt Finn stand beside me. I'd known she'd wanted me for a while, but it was weird to hear an actual time frame.

"So...the whole time we were dating...all those times you said you loved me...those were all lies?"

"No...well, not exactly." I could tell she was about to cry, and I wanted to tell her that she could stop there, but I knew that would just start another yelling match between Finn and me, so I let her keep talking. "I just...I knew there was something about Quinn, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I just figured I wanted us to be friends, no matter how awful she was to me."

"Then she started dating you sophomore year, and I hated it. I figured it was because I liked you, so I started trying to steal you away. When I found out she was pregnant, I...I realized that it wasn't you that I wanted. It was her."

"And you still went after me?" Finn cut in.

"I still didn't like seeing the two of you together, and I did care about you, so I figured that I'd keep trying for you. I thought that if I kept dating you, I'd get over her. I thought I could make myself love you, but I couldn't."

"You told me you loved me!" he yelled.

"I thought that if I said it enough, I could convince myself that it was true. You have to believe that I never meant to hurt you." Rachel was crying by now, so I stepped forward and pulled her into a hug.

"You...you know what, Rachel? I'm done with you. You deserve whatever you get from everybody at this school. You played me." Finn looked over at me. "You both did. I may not bully you, but I sure as hell won't do anything to stop it."

"I will," Sam said, standing up and putting himself between Finn and me.

"So will I," Puck said.

"Are you guys serious?" Finn said. "You're supposed to be my friends!"

"We are, but you're being a douche right now," Sam said.

"Yeah, besides, who in their right mind is gonna get in the way of hot girls making out?" Puck threw in. I rolled my eyes. Even when he was being chivalrous, he was a pig.

"I'm pretty sure everyone's on their side," Artie said, wheeling up next to Sam. "We're a team. We're all friends, and whenever something like this happens, we pull together. We did it for Kurt, and we'll do it for them."

"Okay, guys, regionals is just around the corner, and-" Mr. Schue had a habit of showing up late and at the most awkward moments possible. "Is everything okay, guys?"

"Finn's a prick," Santana said. "That's all."

"I can't believe you guys are ganging up on me right now," he said. Nobody showed him any sympathy. "Fine, I'll leave." He huffed and walked out of the room.

"Um, did Finn just quit?" Mr. Schuester asked, putting his sheet music down at the piano.

"Nah, you know how Finn is," Puck said, standing up. "If me knocking up Quinn didn't do it, his two exes hooking up isn't gonna do it, either."

"Wait, what's going on exactly?" Poor Mr. Schue was always out of the loop.

"Nothing. Let's just rehearse, okay?" Everyone nodded, and we ran through a few numbers. When practice was over, and everyone had left, I went up to Rachel.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said, but I didn't really believe it. "I just...I thought because I was used to the torture that this would be easy for me. At least, I thought it would be easier than this." She put her hand on my face, and I winced a little. I'd forgotten about the swelling from all the excitement in glee. "It's so much harder seeing you go through this than it was just taking slushies."

"I know how you feel," I said. "Well, at least the hard part's over. I mean, with the club supporting us, things will probably be easier."

"You know that's not true," Rachel said. "This was just the beginning."

"Yeah, but I think it'll help me sleep tonight if I lie to myself for a little while."

Rachel laughed. "Okay, I can do that."

I smiled and grabbed her hand. "Do you mind if I come over? I sort of don't wanna be alone right now."

Rachel nodded and smiled even wider. "You know, my dads won't be home until it's time for you to leave. We could always-"

"No, Rach. I'm never getting caught again." She stuck her bottom lip out. "Seriously, no. We're just gonna hang out."

She kept pouting, but I wasn't letting up, so she switched tactics on me and started kissing my neck. She kissed her way up to my ear.

"Please," she husked into my ear.

"Um..." I knew I had a valid reason to say no, but with Rachel this close to me, I couldn't think about anything but...well...Rachel being close to me. "Fine. Just keep in mind that you'll have to pay for my funeral if your dads catch us again."

Rachel went back to smiling and dragged me out of the choir room. For the next few hours, all the problems at school were the furthest thing from my mind.


	17. Santana

Coming out at school had actually made things a little bit easier. It really hadn't taken much, considering that everyone suspected something anyways. We just made a point to confirm it whenever anyone asked. The bullying was pretty bad at first, but considering that Santana, Brittany and I were still on the Cheerios, and Santana threatened anyone that even thought about bullying Brittany (or Rachel and me...but mostly Brittany), most people just decided to back off after a while. The only problems were Karofsky and the Cheerios.

Karofsky mostly just kept it to slushies and names, but the girls on the squad, led by Stephanie, were trying to make all of our lives miserable. Every practice felt like pulling teeth because all of the seniors (and a lot of the juniors at this point) would just blow off everything Santana and I would say. In school there were so many fights and almost-fights that Figgins actually held an assembly about the increase of girl-on-girl violence in the school.

I tried to not let it bother me. I mean, this wasn't really about me being gay; it was about the seniors on the team seeing an opportunity to knock me down a few pegs so they could become the new high school royalty like they thought they deserved. It was a lot easier to swallow when I looked at it that way, and it was even getting to the point where it barely affected me at all.

Things took a turn for the worst at one of our morning practices. About halfway through practice, Sue had actually had to step in and coach the squad. The funny thing about Sue was that she didn't really like running practices. Sure, she liked to sit there and yell at us for sucking, and she was amazing at scouting talent, but when it came to actually critiquing and making sure everyone knew what they were doing, that was left to Santana and me (and Brittany because she was the best dancer of all of us). As soon as practice ended, Santana and I knew we were about to get chewed out.

"This sucks," Santana said to me. "I wish you'd just let me throw down like I want to."

"Need I remind you that your lip just finished healing, like, yesterday?" I said back to her. "We just have to figure out how to get the upper hand."

"All I'm saying is that if I could actually get her one-on-one, we wouldn't have an issue anymore."

"I don't like it when you fight, San," Brittany said walking up to us. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"Aw, B, I wouldn't get hurt."

"Lopez! Fabray! Here, now!" Sue yelled through her megaphone.

"Great," I said. "She's gonna kill us."

"I don't wanna die yet. At least not until One Tree Hill gets canceled."

Santana rolled her eyes. "Who even watched One Tree Hill anymore?"

"I do. I just said that," Brittany said back, and I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes. "I think Nathan and Haley are cute."

"Not as cute as we are," Santana shot back.

"Well, yeah, I know that, but-"

"Girls, when I said here, now, I meant here...NOW!" Sue yelled out. Santana gave Brittany a quick hug, then we ran over to Sue.

"Yes, Coach?" I said, hoping this wouldn't be too bad.

"Girls, I'd like to remind you that I'm going for a seventh consecutive national cheer leading title. S, how many people have accomplished this feat before me?"

"None," Santana said quickly.

"That's exactly right. None. This would be a new record. I am determined to meet and surpass this record, but how am I supposed to do that when every practice that I have devolves into a screaming match or brawl that leaves my perfect Cheerios swollen faces." Sue looked at me...or, more specifically, she looked at the bit of bruise that I still had left from the fight. "Judges don't want to see girls that look like they spend their free time sparring with Sugar Ray Leonard."

"Coach, I understand that things are a little...rough...at the moment, but that doesn't mean-"

She held her hand up in my face to stop me. "I'm not interested in your words. You know, what I liked most about you two when I hand picked you was that you made people fear you. No one stepped out of line because they were terrified of what would happen if they did. You reminded me of a couple of young Sue Sylvesters without quite as much talent."

"Now the two of you disappoint me. You've gone soft. You're both fawning over girls, and frankly, S, I'm just waiting for your chest to explode from the pressure of the Cheerios top." Santana just looked at the ground. I never got why she never stood up to Sue. "So, as of tomorrow, you two are no longer co-captains. Stephanie will be taking over, and the two of you will be demoted to the bottom of the pyramid."

"You can't do that!" I yelled. "We'll have to change all the routines. Most of the underclassmen just learned the one we have now."

"Well then I guess the two of you will just have to put in a little extra time with them," Sue said.

"Wait, you're demoting us and still expecting us to teach everyone what to do?" Santana asked.

"If you wanna stay on this squad, that's exactly what you'll do, and trust me, you want to stay on this squad. You think things are bad for the two of you now? Imagine what the student body would do to you if you weren't in that uniform. I think you remember what that's like, Fabray." I hated to admit that she was right, but she was. The main reason we hadn't gotten it worse was because nobody messed with the Cheerios besides Sue, idiots, and other Cheerios. "I expect to see the two of you on this field tomorrow morning."

"There isn't practice tomorrow morning," I said.

"And that means it's the perfect time for the three of you to start teaching the younger squad members the new routine that I'll have ready after school today."

"The three of us?" Santana asked.

"Well, I assume you'll need Brittany's help, and I figured that threatening her position on the squad would motivate you just that little bit more." Santana looked like she was gonna explode, but she kept her mouth shut. "You can pick up the outline for the new routine at my office after school. Now, get out of my sight before I gag on the stench of mediocrity that's wafting off of you."

Santana and I spun around and walked away. It wasn't like we could say anything that would make a difference.

"This is bullshit!" Santana said as we walked into the locker room. "What the fuck are we supposed to do? I'd just quit, but Brittany loves the Cheerios. I still can't believe Sue dragged her into this. Why is she even doing this?"

"Because she can," I said. "You know how she likes to shake things up when she gets bored."

"Well there has to be something we can do," Santana said. "I'll be damned if I'm gonna let Stephanie boss me around. She's only on the squad because her daddy paid for her spot."

"There's not much we can do without our parents finding out."

Santana slammed her hand against a locker. "I'm so fucking sick of feeling like a victim. I just wanna smash some faces in...or at least be able to tell Coach off or something."

"We'll figure something out. Until then, we're just gonna have to roll with the punches." I looked at the clock in the locker room. "Alright, I gotta go. Rachel's probably waiting for me to walk her to class."

Santana just nodded, and I walked out of the locker room. I figured I'd ask Rachel what she thought we should do, but when I got to her locker and saw the slushie residue everywhere, I knew that she wasn't the one to ask at the moment. See, Rachel was getting it the worst out of all of us because Rachel had always been bullied, and there was only so much I could do with the looming threat that the school would get my parents involved.

I walked to the bathroom and let myself in. Rachel was leaning over the sink, trying to get the slushie out of her hair. I walked up to her and put my hand on her back, and she jumped.

"Oh! Quinn! You scared me half to death. How'd you know I was here?"

"I sort of just followed the slushie trail," I said. "Was it Karofsky, or is there somebody else I have to add to my list?"

"It was actually Stephanie. She said something about a changing in order...or something. It's hard for me to listen to people when it feels like I got slapped in the face by an iceberg."

"I'm sorry," I said. "This is my fault. She wouldn't even care about you if it she weren't trying to bother me."

"What was she talking about?" Rachel asked, drying her hair.

I sighed. "Sue informed Santana and me that Stephanie will be captain of the Cheerios starting tomorrow."

"What? Why?"

"The squad's a little off since everything happened."

"Oh...so this is my fault, then," Rachel said, looking at the ground.

"What? This isn't your fault. She was already being a bitch before it got out about us. She's just like that."

"But everything got worse when people found out about us. I...I'm the reason that your life is so bad right now."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "What are you saying, Rachel?"

"I'm saying...maybe we should take a break. I mean, everything was going so well for you before I came along and messed everything up for you." A tear slid down her cheek. "You don't deserve all the bad stuff that's happening to you, Quinn, and I-"

"No," I cut her off. "You are not gonna break up with me because you think it would make my life easier, because it wouldn't."

"Quinn, if it weren't for me, you'd still be head Cheerio with the perfect boyfriend and the perfect life."

"No, I'd be a self-loathing closet case stuck with a beard and forced to hide a home-life that's in shambles. I wouldn't have patched things up with Santana, I would barely ever speak to Brittany, and I'd have nowhere to go when things at home with my dad got to be too much. Besides, even if I didn't get all that stuff, I still wouldn't take back being with you because I love you. I've loved you for longer than I think I even realize." I grabbed her and pulled her into a hug. "I don't want you to think for a second that things would be better for me if you weren't around. Even with all the drama I'm happier now than I have been in a long time."

I pulled away and Rachel was crying "I just wanted to make sure. I didn't want you to stay with me if you thought things would be better if I walked away."

I shook my head. "Trust me; I'm over being with people that I don't want. If I ever get sick of you, I'll break up with you."

"I really hope that day never comes," she said with a laugh.

"I'm sure it won't. Now come on, I'll help you get cleaned up so we can get to class." It didn't take long to clean Rachel up. I'd gotten pretty good at cleaning a slushie facial, and Rachel was practically a pro. We weren't even late to class. The day went by with two more slushies for Rachel and an argument between Santana and Stephanie that had ended up with Santana being sent home early for shoving Stephanie into a set of lockers. I'd just escaped getting in trouble for the whole thing, too.

"This is getting ridiculous," I said to Rachel over the phone that night. "I mean, we'd almost calmed everything down, then Coach had to screw everything up by demoting Santana and me."

"Plus Karofsky's been on the warpath ever since word got out that Kurt was thinking about coming back to McKinley."

"I know," I said. "It feels like every time things start looking up, something else has to happen to bring us back down."

"It does feel a lot like that sometimes," she said back to me. "I just dream of a day that we won't have to be in this small-minded town, and we can be together without having to worry about anyone else."

"There'll always be bigots, Rachel."

"Yeah, but there are less in big cities like New York. It'll be easier for us. I've already got it all planned out."

"Oh, really?" I asked, a little amused. Of course Rachel would be planning our futures together.

"Yes. Brittany has already informed me that she also has plans of going to New York to find fame, so I figured that you, me, Brittany and Santana...because let's be honest; Santana would follow Brittany off of a cliff at this point...could all be roommates while we struggle in the beginning. You and Santana will probably be at NYU while Brittany and I are at Julliard. Of course, we'll have to work on Brittany's grades, but after tutoring her a little bit in English, I find that she's catches on just fine if you know how to explain something to her."

I laughed a little. "Exactly how long have you been planning this?" I asked.

"Well, including Brittany and Santana in my plans came more recently, but I've planned my future with you in it for quite a while. Of course, I made a back-up plan with Finn, but you were always my first choice." I smiled. I never got tired of hearing that. "Although, some of my plans with you have changed as well."

"Like what?"

"I hadn't planned on us getting together until the end of our senior year, where I would perform a solo for you under the guise of it being for Finn, but you would see right through that, and after some brief gay panic, you would come running to me. I also hadn't planned on having sex until 25, but that went right out the window."

"And on our first official date, too," I said. "You just couldn't keep your hormones in check."

"I figured that since we loved each other, and I can't see a future without you at this point, and I feel that you feel the same way about me, there was no point in waiting." I smiled. "And besides, you look so hot in that Cheerios uniform. How was I supposed to resist you?"

I laughed. "And what about all the times since then?"

"We'd already done it once, Quinn. It's just plain ludicrous for us not to continue after our firs encounter."

"So basically, what you're saying is that you're a horndog?"

"Quinn! I'm offended that you'd call me such a thing!" I could almost see Rachel putting her hand to her chest in mock outrage.

"I notice that you're not denying it."

"Oh, would you look at that? It's almost nine o'clock, and I haven't uploaded a video to MySpace yet. I'm afraid that I'll have to cut our conversation short."

I laughed a little bit before I heard my doorbell ring. "That's alright. I think someone's at my door anyways."

"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow. I love you, Quinn."

"I love you, too, horndog." After a few giggles, we both hung up and I walked downstairs to see who was at my house this late. I opened the door, and Santana was on my doorstep.

"Hey," I said, looking at her. Something was definitely wrong. "Are you okay?"

It took her a second to even say anything. "First off, I wanted to say sorry for almost getting you in trouble today. I shouldn't have snapped like I did, but you know how I get when people start in on Brittany."

"That's okay. I'd basically already forgotten about that," I said, but I knew there was more. She could've just called me and told me that. "You didn't just come here about the fight, did you?"

She sighed and looked at the ground. "I fucked up, Quinn. I didn't stick to the plan. I mean, I should've, but I'm just so sick of everything at school. I had to do something."

"Santana, what did you do?" I asked. "You didn't, like, go to Stephanie's house and kill her or anything, right?" Santana laughed a little bit before it turned into a sob. "Hey, whoa, you need to tell me what's going on."

"You know, before Glee club, I never cried. I mean, you remember." Santana was almost shaking. "I was cold, heartless Santana Lopez. Nothing could stop me. Nothing could touch me. It was like I was invincible. I miss that sometimes."

I put my hand on her shoulder. "Sweetie, whatever happened...it's going to be okay. I'm here for you. Brittany would die for you. Hell, even Rachel's written you into her life plans. Just...just tell me what happened so I can help you." Santana took a moment to calm down before she said anything.

"I...I was wondering if I could stay here for the night," she said.

"Why?"

"Because...because I told my parents about me and they threw me out." Santana broke down again, and I had to catch her before she fell to the ground. I basically had to carry her up to my room and sit her on my bed. I kept holding onto her and trying to calm her down. It was a full half an hour before the sobs subsided.

"San, what happened?" I asked her.

"They...they asked me why I was getting into so much trouble at school. I told them that they wouldn't understand, and my mom said that they'd understand and no matter what, even if they were upset of disappointed at me, that they'd still love me. I thought...I thought that it was, like, a sign, y'know? Like this was God's way of telling me that they would understand...so I told them. I told them that I was in love with a girl"

"When they asked me if it was Brittany, I thought they just wanted to know. Then, when I told them, they started saying that I wasn't allowed to see her anymore, and they were going to pray for my confusion to go away or something. When I told them that I wasn't confused and that I knew I loved her...that I knew she was the one...my mom started crying and my dad started screaming for me to get out of the house. I tried to talk to them, but they were both so angry, so I grabbed some clothes and other stuff and ran out."

My heart broke for her. I knew how that felt.

"I'm so, so sorry," I said. "Have you told Brittany yet?"

She shook her head. "I know I'll have to tell her eventually, but I don't wanna worry her. I've already put her through enough of my shit."

"I'm sure she wouldn't mind," I said.

"I know, but...I just can't take making Brittany upset on top of everything else that happened tonight. It's just too much."

I nodded. "Well, I have to ask my parents if you can stay, but if they say no, I'm sure Rachel will be alright with you staying at her place for a night."

Santana rolled her eyes. "I really hope your parents are cool, because I don't know if I can take an entire night alone with the midget without you there as a buffer."

"I don't know if I like you calling my girlfriend a midget."

"Whatever, Fabray. You know I say it with love." She smiled at me, and I smiled back. Underneath all the layers of bitch, Santana was really just a big softie...at least when it came to the people that mattered to her.

"Alright, you stay here. I'm just gonna go ask my parents," I said, getting off the bed. I hated interrupting my parents' TV time, but I didn't really have a choice. I knocked on their bedroom door, and my dad told me to come in.

"What is it, Quinnie?" my mom said.

"Sorry to bother you, but Santana..." I didn't know exactly how much I should tell them. "Santana and her parents got into a fight, and she needs a place to stay for the night. Do you think it'd be okay if she sleeps here?" My dad looked annoyed, and my mom looked concerned.

"What happened with her parents? Did she just run out? Should we call them and tell them where she is?" my mom asked in rapid succession.

"Doesn't she have anywhere else to stay? What about with your blonde friend? Briana?"

"Brittany," I corrected. "And she can't stay there tonight. And no, calling Santana's parents is probably a bad idea. They're really angry right now."

"She isn't pregnant, is she?" My father snapped out.

"No, Dad, she's not pregnant," I snapped back.

"Don't take that tone of voice with me, young lady."

Russell..."

"No," I cut in. "It's fine, Mom." I turned my attention back to my father. "I'm sorry, _Sir,_ but I'm just worried about her."

"What exactly did she do to upset her parents?" he asked.

"She...she didn't really say, but she's been getting a hard time at school lately...for being in Glee club and everything, so it probably had something to do with that."

He shook his head. "I don't know why you girls feel the need to be in that club when all it does is cause you trouble," he said. After a moment of thought, he spoke up again. "Alright, she can stay, but just for the night. After that, she'll need to find somewhere else."

"Does she need anything?" my mom asked. "I could make her some soup."

"I think she just needs sleep, but thanks anyway, Mom"

"Well, if she does need anything, just tell me, okay?" I nodded at my mom and left the room. I walked into the room and Santana was already under my blankets.

"You really didn't wait to make yourself comfortable, did you?" I said to her.

"Yeah, well, I'm tired, and your fat ass was taking to long." She looked at me. "Did they say I could stay?" I nodded, and she sighed in relief. "I took some sweats and stuff from your drawer. I hope that's okay."

"Yeah, that's fine," I said, crawling into bed next to her. We laid there for a few minutes in silence before I could hear Santana giggling. "What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing. I was just thinking that the last time we had a sleepover with just the two of us was probably freshman year. Back when everything was simple. Before I was sleeping with Brittany."

"But you still loved her," I said.

"Yeah...yeah, I did," she said back to me. We didn't say anything else to each other. I wondered if Santana would even get any sleep that night. I figured she wouldn't.


	18. Quit

A/N: I SUCK AT UPDATING! Seriously, every time I go to write, some weird thing comes up where I have to leav my house, so sorry this is so delayed. But it's here now...

A/N 2: A reviewer gave me the idea of re-writing this from Brittana's point-of-view after I finish this one, so I was wondering who would be willing to read that. Just tell me in reviews or whatever.

Enjoy!

* * *

I was woken up in the middle of the night by the sound of something hitting my window. At first, I just thought it was some stray branches from the tree outside my house hitting the window because of a breeze or something, but it wasn't stopping, so I got out of bed, careful to make sure that I didn't wake Santana up. When I got to my window, I almost laughed at what I saw.

Brittany was throwing rocks at my window.

I threw open my window, but Brittany hadn't noticed I was there, so I got a stone square in the forehead.

"Son of a bitch!" I yelled out, trying to keep my voice down so I wouldn't wake up the neighborhood or worse, my parents.

"I'm so sorry!" Brittany shouted, not so concerned with staying quiet. I made a shushing sound, and she got the picture and quieting down.. "I didn't see you until I'd already let it go."

"What're you doing here?" I asked.

"I'm worried about Santana. I tried to call her, but she wasn't answering her cell, so I called her house, and her mom just said something about a horse." It took me a second to realize what Santana's mom had called Brittany. She really wasn't taking this well. "I went over there, but her parents just yelled at me in Spanish and said Santana wasn't there. Do you know where she went?"

"She's here," I said.

Brittany looked relieved. "Is she alright? What happened?"

"She can explain everything to you tomorrow. Right now, you need to get home. Do your parents even know you're gone?"

She nodded. "My dad was still awake when I was leaving, so he gave me a ride. He's out front waiting for me." I laughed a little. Brittany's whole family was a little bit on the weird side. "Can I come in and see her?"

"I don't know about that," I said, worrying that my dad would wake up and freak out. "She's asleep right now anyway."

Brittany looked sad, but she nodded. "Okay. That's fine. You guys are still coming to school tomorrow, right?" I nodded, and Brittany smiled. "Good. I'll see you then. Tell Santana I love her when she wakes up."

"I will," I said, and Brittany ran off with a wave. When I turned around, Santana was standing behind me. I almost jumped out of my skin.

"Calm down," she said, arms crossed over her chest.

"How long have you been standing there?" I asked.

"Since I heard Brittany yell sorry about nailing you in the face," she said with a smirk. "I think it might leave a mark. Seriously, Fabray, you're starting to look pretty busted up."

"Shut up," I said. "Why didn't you say anything to Brittany?"

"Because if I talked to her, she never would've left, even if she had to sleep on your back lawn." Santana sat down on my bed. "I didn't want you getting caught sneaking her in or her catching something from being out in the cold all night."

I laughed and sat down next to Santana. "That's quite a girl you've got there, San."

"She is," she said with a sad smile. "I wish my family could see that."

I sighed. "They'll come around. If they don't, they're stupid." Santana just nodded and crawled back under the covers.

"I'm gonna try to sleep. We have to wake up early for that stupid freshman practice tomorrow."

I groaned. "I can't believe we have to do that," I said, crawling under the covers next to Santana.

"Yeah, well, Coach was right about everything getting worse without the uniform. I don't think we could take worse than we're getting now."

I knew she wasn't worried about what was happening to her. She was a lot more worried about what would happen to Brittany if we got kicked off the team. I decided to let it slide, and I went to sleep.

* * *

Our morning practice actually went really well. That was mostly because all the seniors weren't there, but I took the small victory. Santana took a little too much of her personal problems out on the freshmen, but it didn't get out of hand, and they all seemed to understand (or were too afraid to say anything), so none of them spoke up. We'd actually managed to teach them most of the new routine.

"Well, at least they're learning fast," I said as we walked out of the locker room after practice. "That just leaves the talentless seniors."

"So, basically, we're screwed," Santana said, and Brittany laughed and nodded. Right as I turned the corner, we practically walked into Stephanie and her lackeys.

"Oh, hello," she said with a fake sweetness in her voice. "How was your morning practice?"

"Seriously, don't you ever get tired of being a mega bitch?" Santana spat out.

"Don't you?" Stephanie shot back. "And you can't talk to me like that anymore. I am your captain, after all."

"We may have to take your shit out on the field, but we can say whatever we want the rest of the day," I said.

"I really don't think Coach Sylvester would like to hear about two of her girls mouthing off to the head Cheerio," she said. "I think you should probably apologize."

"No," Brittany said. "You're mean for no reason, and I hate you. You should be the one apologizing."

Stephanie just laughed. "You know, you should really think about getting your mouth glued shut. You'd come off a lot smarter that way."

"And you should get a lobotomy," Santana said, stepping slightly in front of Brittany. "You might get a few IQ points yourself."

"Can you just leave us the hell alone," I said. "I really don't need this every morning."

Stephanie laughed some more. "Well, if you're off to find your girlfriend, she won't be by her locker. You might wanna try one of the bathrooms." I went to lunge at her, but Santana grabbed me.

"One day without one of us nearly getting suspended would be nice," she said as she held me back.

Stephanie shook her head. "You guys should really work on your tempers. They're getting way out of hand." With that, Stephanie left, her followers trailing behind. Santana let me go, and we all walked to meet Rachel by her locker. Fortunately, she wasn't covered in corn syrup, but she looked upset. Brittany and Santana went to their lockers to leave me alone with Rachel.

"Hey," I said. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she said, smiling at me, but I could tell it was forced.

"Come on, Rachel. Tell me what's wrong."

"You'll just overreact," she said. "I don't need you going jealous girlfriend on me." I frowned. There was only one person that would make Rachel think I'd get like that.

"So Finn talked to you?" I asked. "What'd he say?"

"It doesn't matter," she groaned out, practically slamming her locker shut. "He's just being an idiot." She started walking to first period, and I followed her.

"It obviously does matter, because it's got you upset." She still wasn't saying anything. "Rachel, please don't leave me in the dark, here." She kept walking. "Are you leaving me for Finn?"

She stopped in her tracks and spun around to face me. She looked like I'd just punched her. "Do you really think that little of me?"

"No, but it got your attention," I said. She rolled her eyes and went to turn back around, but I grabbed her arm. "Look, things are hard enough as it is. They'll only get harder if we start hiding stuff from each other." She looked at the ground. "Come on, it can't be that bad."

"He kissed me," she said. I hadn't quite expected that. I guess I looked as shocked as I felt, because Rachel started babbling. "He came up to me and started saying how sorry he was about the other day and that he still didn't trust you, and I defended you, but he wouldn't listen, and he kept saying that you couldn't love me like he did, and then he kissed me, but I shoved him away. I didn't kiss back, so he got mad and started saying that he was going to call your house tonight and tell your dad everything about us. I didn't want to tell you, because I figured you'd panic or try to kill Finn or both, and I'm pretty sure he's bluffing, and please say something before I pass out from lack of oxygen, and-"

"Rachel," I finally cut in. She stopped talking and started panting. She's really worked herself up. "I'm not gonna panic."

"You're...you're not?" she asked.

"No," I said, shaking my head. The truth was that I was already panicking. This was just one more person that was threatening to destroy my life over something petty. I just didn't want Rachel to worry.

Rachel let out a sigh of relief. "Good. I thought you might fly off the handle. I honestly don't think he has it in him to say anything to your dad, especially considering that the last time they spoke, your dad thought Finn was the father of your child."

"True, I bet he..." I drifted off as I saw Brittany and Santana walking towards me, frowns on their faces. I cringed. "Can't I ever catch a fucking break?"

Rachel just looked at me confused, then looked over her shoulder as Brittany and Santana approached.

"Becky says Coach wants us," Santana said.

"For what now?" I groaned out.

"I don't care. At this point, I'm just gonna sit there and hum a tune in my head while she talks or screams or whatever. It's not like I've got anything for her to hold over my head now that my family knows."

"You came out?" Rachel asked. "When?" She turned to me. "And why didn't you tell me?"

"Calm down, Munchkin. It just happened last night." Santana looked at me. "By the way, I'm staying with Britt from now on, so I'll be out of you and your dad's hair."

I just rolled my eyes again. I felt like a terrible person for wishing that my dad would just leave my mom again and never come back, but I couldn't help it. Everything would be so much easier if my dad weren't around.

"Let's get this over with," I said. "I'll see you when I get out of Sylvester's office." I gave Rachel a kiss on the cheek then started walking to Coach Sylvester's office, but Santana stopped me.

"Becky said they'd be in Figgins' office," she said. I didn't even respond. I just changed my course and walked into the principal's office. When we got there, Coach, Figgins, and Stephanie were all sitting there waiting for us.

"Of course you have something to do with this," I said, facing Stephanie. She just smirked at me.

"Miss Fabray, Stephanie has come to me saying that you have been harassing her with the help of your two friends, here," Figgins said. "What do you three have to say for yourselves."

Santana was the first to speak. "Seriously? She's been giving us shit for weeks now-"

"Miss Lopez, I'm going to have to ask you to watch your language unless you want a call to be made to your parents."

"Go ahead and call them," she snapped out. "It's not like I'm living with them anyways, which, by the way, is totally Stephanie's fault." She turned to her. "If it weren't for you always starting fights with me, I wouldn't have had to tell my parents about me."

"It's not my fault you guys are all freaks," she said, and Santana would've flipped if Brittany hadn't snuck up and wrapped her arms around her.

"Ladies," Sue cut in. "Let's all just take a minute and calm down. I really think this is a Cheerios problem that doesn't need to involve Principal Figgins."

I turned to Sue. "Why? You so afraid of losing Cheerios before competition that you're okay with seeing us be bullied? I expected better from you after what you tried to do for Kurt, but I guess it's different when it's some of your own...when it affects your precious seventh national championship, right?"

"What exactly is happening here?" Principal Figgins asked.

Sue jumped in. "I think it's pretty clear that this is a simple case of girls being girls. There was probably a stolen boyfriend involved. Now, if you'll excuse us, I need to speak to my girls."

"No," I said. "This isn't about a boy. Stephanie's been pushing us around because we're gay."

"It's true," Brittany said. "It's arachnophobia."

"Homophobia, Britt," Santana corrected.

"That's a serious accusation," Figgins said. "There could be serious consequences."

"And it's not true!" Stephanie yelled out. "They're just jealous because Coach made me head Cheerio!"

"Oh, so you're gonna say you didn't write 'dyke' on my locker in lipstick a few days ago?" Santana spat out. I hadn't even known about that one.

"Did you see her do it?" Sue said. "Do you have any proof at all, or are you just jumping to conclusions."

"Yeah, that could've been anybody," Stephanie jumped in.

"You're the only one that wears a shade that looks like a cheap hooker would wear," Santana said.

"You see?" Stephanie said, pointing at Santana. "She says stuff like that to me all the time.

"Santana says stuff like that to everyone all the time. It's not personal," I said. "Stephanie's been the one starting everything."

"Well, it seems that we'll need to have a conference with all of your parents to sort this out," Figgins said, and I felt my blood run cold like it always did when my parents were brought up.

"My...my parents don't exactly know about...me being gay," I said. "Things would only get worse for me if they found out."

"Well, I'm sorry, Quinn, but if you can't provide any evidence, and I can't contact your parents, then there isn't much of anything I can do."

"You can talk to my parents," Stephanie said. "Does that mean that they can get in trouble?"

"I think it would be best to let this go for the time being," he said. "Just try to stay out of each other's way."

How did he still have this job?

"I think that will work," Sue said. "Girls, I want you all in my office, now." She stormed off, and the rest of us followed close behind. When we got to her office, Sue glared at Stephanie.

"Why did you go to Figgins?" she asked.

"I...I thought I could get them suspended or something. They're bringing down the rep of the squad. Now everybody thinks that we're all lesbians. Boys aren't even giving us a second glance."

"Boys never gave you a second glance, Stephanie," I snapped out.

"Well at least I'm not spending all my free time with my head between Berry's-"

"Enough!" Coach yelled. "Listen to me: if you have any problems you come to me. Not to your boyfriends or girlfriends or the pathetic ecuse of a man that is Will Schuester and especially not Principal Figgins, do you all understand me?"

"Why not?" Brittany asked.

"Because if you do, I'll kick you off the squad faster than you can say Melissa Etheridge, you understand now?"

Brittany looked like she was thinking about something for a while. For a minute, I was really starting to question if she did understand what Sylvester was saying. Coach looked like she was about to pop from the non-response when Brittany finally spoke up.

"Yeah, I get it," she said. Coach looked briefly relieved before Brittany spoke up again. "I quit."

I wasn't quite sure I'd heard that right. When I saw the shocked looks on everyone's faces, I figured I had.

"Excuse me?" Coach said.

"I quit. Cheerios isn't fun anymore, and you're mean to everyone I like, and nice to everyone I hate, so I quit."

"You can't quit," she said. "You're my best dancer."

"Sucks for you," Brittany said back with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Good," Stephanie said. "We don't need you, anyways."

I looked from Brittany, who looked happy as a clam, to Santana, who was still in complete shock, to Coach Sylvester, who looked like she was having a heart attack. Suddenly, a lot of things cleared up for me.

"You were never gonna throw us off the squad," I said. "You need us. Without us, you don't have much talent on that team. It was just an empty threat." She didn't say anything, so I kept talking. "You know what? Being on this squad used to mean everything to me. It was the symbol of who I wanted to be in my life. In my future. I see now that I don't want that future, because it would mean that I'd end up a bitter old woman, alone, without anything in my life to live for besides terrifying others and winning high school cheer leading titles. I don't wanna be a Lima loser. I quit, too."

Brittany clapped, and I smiled at her. Sue was grinding her teeth so hard I could hear it. I looked to Santana.

"I think it's safe to say that I quit, too," she said. Brittany grabbed Santana's hand and led her out of the office. I went to follow when Sue spoke up.

"I can still tell your father, you know!"

I turned and faced her. "Go ahead. I'm telling him tonight anyways. You calling would just break the ice." With that, I walked out the door, feeling like a thousand pounds had been taken off my shoulders. I felt like I could finally breathe again. I expected to see Brittany and Santana already engaged in a heated we're-finally-free-of-Sue-Sylvester lip lock, but they were just looking at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Are you really gonna tell your dad?" Santana asked.

I felt that weight go right back on. When I'd said it to Sue, I'd just said it mostly to make her feel like I didn't give a fuck, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I couldn't hide it forever. He'd find out eventually, and the longer I hid it, the worse things were going to be.

I nodded. "Tonight, I'm telling my parents that I'm gay."


	19. Confessions

A/N: Okay, so apparently, I wasn't clear last time in my author's note (that's probably because it was 5 in the morning when I got the chapter up). What I was trying to say is that I'd like to re-write this whole story, but from the Brittany and Santana side of things. I'm not sure if I'd do it from Brittany or Santana's POV (it would probably be Santana's, though, because I relate to her so much). Tell me if you'd be interested in that. Okay...on with the story. Enjoy!

* * *

I sat in my car, staring out the windshield, gripping the steering wheel as tightly as I could. I didn't wanna go home. I was sort of hoping that a hole would appear beneath my car and swallow me so I wouldn't have to do this.

I felt a little ashamed for feeling this afraid of my father. Of course, I was worried about both of my parents' reactions, but I knew that even if my mom did reject me, it would be in a passive way. My dad...he'd never laid a hand on me before, but this might just be the one thing that pushes him over the edge.

I wondered if it was at all possible for me to just sit in my car for the rest of my life.

"Quinn, I think we need to drive now."

Oh yeah, Rachel was in the car with me. When I'd told her I was telling my parents, she'd insisted on being there. I was a little afraid that would just rile my dad up even more, but frankly, I didn't think I could do this alone. Besides, he already hated Rachel, so it's not like this would be dragging her name through the mud as far as my dad was concerned.

"Can't I just not tell them?" I asked.

"You know I'll be there for you whether you tell them or not, but I think that in the long run, it'll be for the best."

"I'll be homeless," I said. "How is that for the best?"

"You won't be homeless," she said back. "You'll stay at my house. It may be a little tense with my daddy not liking you so much, but I think he's warming up to you, and my dad loves you like his own at this point."

"I guess the memory of the two of us naked has faded a little bit." It took me a long time to be able to be in the same room with the Berry men without blushing. "Still, I don't wanna do that. I don't wanna be a burden. I already feel bad enough for putting all this stress on your relationship with your dads."

Rachel just shook her head. "Daddy will get over it eventually."

I sighed. "I really don't wanna do this. I...I don't know if this is the right time."

"Sometimes the right time never comes," she said. "You just have to get it over with. I'll be right there with you. Besides, I think you're building up to be worse than it really will be."

I nodded. "Okay...okay, let's do this." I turned my car on, then turned it back off. "You'll hold my hand, right?"

She smiled. "I'll do whatever you need me to, sweetie."

I started the car again and drove to my house. The ride felt a lot faster than it usually did...probably because I was still hoping for more time...but Rachel was right. I wanted to do this. I needed to do this. I got out of the car and ran over to open Rachel's door for her.

"Still chivalrous even in times of great duress. I'm impressed." I tried to laugh, but it came out like a weird strangling sound.

"I'm terrified, Rachel. I don't wanna lose my home again. I don't wanna lose my mom again. My dad, I don't care about so much, but I hate it when he flies off the handle."

"I know, but I promise you'll feel better when you're not hiding anymore," she said, taking my hand. I immediately felt a little better.

"Let's do this," I said, walking to the door. When I walked in my house, my parents were sitting in the living room.

"What's she doing here?" my dad said.

"Is everything okay?" I said, ignoring my dad's question and the fact that he was staring at our joined hands. "Did you need to talk to me about something?"

"I think this would be best discussed between our family. You should go, Rachel."

"No," I said. "I have something to tell you guys, and Rachel's here to help me."

"It better not have anything to do with why Santana's parents threw her out," my dad snarled out. I felt my heart drop and my stomach turn.

"Honey," my mom said. "Santana's parents called us trying to figure out where she was. They told us that she...well...that she and Brittany were-"

"They told us that she's a deviant," my dad said.

"I think the term is gay," my mom said. "They said that she and Brittany are dating."

"They...they are," I said, grabbing Rachel's hand tighter.

"Well, that's two more people you won't be speaking to. In fact, I think it would be best if we transferred you to a private Catholic school."

"Dad-" I said, but he cut me off.

"No, Quinn. This isn't up for discussion. That public school is obviously not teaching you the right values."

"Mr. Fabray, I think you should just hear Quinn out-"

"None out of you," he said, standing up and pointing at Rachel. "You've infected my daughters life enough, spreading lies about people like you, making her think that it's okay. You're vile and sick, and-"

"Don't talk about her like that," I said, putting myself between Rachel and my dad. He looked furious.

"Quinn, let her hand go, and come over here," he said.

"No," I snapped back.

"Quinn Lucy Fabray, I'm your father, and you'll do as I say, do you understand?"

"I'm not letting her go," I said. "I...I love her."

My mom looked shocked, and my dad's whole face turned an angry shade of red. I was pretty sure he was shaking.

"What're you saying, Quinn?" my mom asked from the couch.

"I'm saying...I'm saying that I love her. I'm gay." I felt a tear force itself out, but I wiped it away. I didn't want my father to think I was weak. "And you can't stop me from feeling the way I feel, _sir._"

I spat out the last word like a swear.

"You are not gay," he said with an eery calm.

"Yes I am," I said back, blinking away more tears.

"No daughter of mine is going to be gay."

"Then I guess I'm not your daughter," I said.

"Quinnie!" my mom said, jumping to her feet. "Don't say that."

"If he can't love me for who I am, then he can't call himself my family."

"Your sin is not who you are!" he yelled.

"It's not a sin!" I yelled. "God loves me no matter who I'm with. Why can't you?"

"I won't stand for this," he said, pacing back and forth in front of me.

"What're you gonna do, throw me out again?" I said.

"No. You're my daughter, and I'm done with you dragging our family name through the mud. You'll stop being around all these perverts, and I'll put you in a camp."

I let out a laugh. "You think a pray-away-the-gay camp is gonna do anything? Those don't work!"

He ignored me. "I have to call the pastor. I'm sure he knows a place that we can send you."

"I won't go," I said. "You can't make me."

"You aren't an adult, Quinn. I make the decisions for your life."

"You can't just send her away," Rachel said from behind me.

"Get out of my house before I throw you out, little girl," he said to her.

"With all due respect, Mr. Fabray, I'm not leaving Quinn here with you," she said. "You're not in your right mind." My dad took a few steps closer to us, and I just pushed Rachel further behind me.

"Don't even think about touching her," I said.

"She's made you a sick freak just like her and her perverted fathers!"

"Russel!" my mom yelled.

"Be quiet, Judy!" he yelled back.

"No!" she shouted back, and that got all of our attention.

"What did you just say?" he said, facing her.

"I won't let your speak to our daughter like that anymore," she said. "And I have a few things I'd like to say to her." She stepped around him and closer to me. "Quinnie...I remember when we made you leave the first time...you said I knew about the pregnancy, and I did. I ignored it because I didn't know how to deal with it. I didn't know how to be a good mother to you. This...this new problem-"

"It's not a problem," I said. "It's who I am."

My mom just took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I...I don't always have the right words. I just meant...I've had a feeling you were this way...gay...for a while now."

My eyes widened. "You...you knew?"

"I suspected, and I knew that if you were, that it had something to do with Rachel. I could tell you adored her, and I had a feeling it wasn't just as a friend. At first, I hated the idea of you being gay. I didn't know how to handle it, but I promised myself after everything that happened last year, I wouldn't turn my back on you. You said you needed your mom, and I wanted to be there for you this time, even if I didn't think it was right."

"Mom-"

"No, let me finish," she said. "At first, I talked to our pastor, and much like your father, he said we needed to send you to a facility that knew how to deal with your issues. To be honest, I considered it. I thought about it and prayed about it, and it didn't seem like the right thing to do in the end, so I started looking things up on the internet, trying to find a way to fix you, but the more I read, the more I felt that you weren't the one who needed changing...I was."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "What're you saying, Mom?"

She took a deep breath. "I've been going to PFLAG meetings on Wednesdays."

"You told me you had bible study on Wednesdays," my dad said.

"I knew you wouldn't understand," she said back to him. "I just...I just wanted to understand how you felt and where you were coming from. I realized that I haven't been a very good mother to you. I've spent your entire life drinking and ignoring problems, hoping they would go away. I don't want that anymore."

"That's why you stopped drinking," I said.

She nodded. "I was planning on coming to you and talking about this when I felt more...used to the idea. I hadn't planned on you coming out before I was ready. I'm sorry."

I couldn't believe this. My mom had been going to PFLAG meetings? She'd stopped drinking so she could be a better mom to me? I'd been expecting her to just back my dad up in whatever craziness he'd throw at me. I guess I needed to give my mom more credit.

"I can't believe that my whole family has been brainwashed," my dad spat out. "It's clear that Lima isn't the safe place it once was. We're moving as soon as possible. The two of you need to be reminded of what being a Christian really is."

"No, Russel," my mom said. "You need to be taught what it means to be a true Christian. Jesus preached love, not hate."

"Being gay is a sin. There's no gray area in that, and if you can't accept that, then when you face our holy father, he will lay judgment on you, and you will spend eternity in hell."

"And if you can't accept that I refuse to let my daughter be forced from her home again, then you'll have to leave," my mom said.

My dad looked flabbergasted. "You would rather be with our failure of a daughter than the man that has provided and cared for you for all these years?"

That shouldn't have hurt as much as it did.

"Russel...I love you. Since the moment we met, I knew that you were the one for me. One of the best days of my life was the day you asked me to be your wife. Even after you cheated on me with that tattooed freak, I still loved you, and I wanted so badly for this to work, but if you're asking me to choose between you and my daughter, I'll choose her every time."

A few tears finally leaked out of my eyes and down my cheeks. My mom really did love me.

My parents were having a staring match, neither of them willing to give an inch. Finally my dad spoke up.

"Fine. If the two of you want to burn in hell, be my guests. Don't expect me to come back again. This time, it's final." When my mom didn't say anything, my dad stormed up the stairs. Just as he reached the top, my mom spoke again.

"Russel?" she said. My dad turned around. "You have thirty minutes. I'm setting the timer on the oven."

He just turned around and grumbled something that I couldn't hear. As soon as he was out of eyesight, I threw myself into my mom's arms.

"Thank you," I said, tears falling freely now.

"I want you to feel safe here," she said. Then she let me go and looked at Rachel. She took a few steps towards her, then pulled her into a hug, too. "Both of you. I want you to know that I'm here for you, and I might not always get it right. My whole life I've been told this is wrong, so it'll take some getting used to, but know I'm trying."

Rachel looked shocked, but hugged back. "Thank you, Mrs. Fabray. It means so much."

"Do either of you need anything? Food?" My mom was in full-on comfort mode.

"I could use a glass of water," Rachel said. My mom just nodded and ran off to the kitchen. Rachel and I looked at each other.

"Well...I really wasn't expecting that," I finally said.

"Are you alright?" Rachel asked me. "I mean...this is sort of a lot to take in."

I nodded. "Yeah I'm fine. I'm actually feeling pretty good about everything."

Rachel nodded. "Is your dad just gonna leave?"

"Technically, it's my mom's house. He was just paying most of the bills...all of the bills, actually," I said. "We don't have a house payment or anything, but the bills for the cars and utilities and our cell phones and all that-"

"I don't want you to worry about all that. We'll figure something out," my mom said, walking back in the room and handing Rachel a glass of water. Rachel said a quick thanks. "In the mean time, Rachel, if you'd like to spend the night tonight, if your fathers approve, I would be okay with that. You'd both still have to go to school in the morning...and keep the door open."

Rachel nodded. "I think under the circumstances, my fathers would be okay with me staying here. I'll go call them and ask." Rachel walked out of the room, leaving me with my mom.

"I'm sorry," I said after a few seconds.

"For what?" she asked.

"For ruining everything," I said. "For making you lose dad and everything. I know you still love him."

"Quinn, I want you to listen to me. This is not your fault." I tried to say something, but she just held her hand up. "No. I'm not letting you think that this is all because of you. Your father and I have been drifting apart for years...even before your pregnancy. You don't have any reason to feel guilty." She hugged me again, and Rachel came back in the room.

"My dad said it was fine. You'll probably be getting a call later to make sure it's alright with you, just so you know." My mom just smiled and nodded. We all turned our heads to the top of the stairs when we heard my dad coming. When he got to the bottom of the stairs, he glared at Rachel.

"I hope you're happy, you little slu-"

"Leave!" I yelled at him. His glare shifted to me.

"You'll regret this," he said. "One day, you'll realize the mistake you're making right now."

"I really doubt it," I said.

"Russel, I think it'd be best if you left now," my mom said.

He looked between us all, then walked out the door, uttering a few choice swears as he left. The moment the door closed behind him, I felt like I could finally breathe again.

My mom, Rachel, and I spent the rest of the night pigging out on food and watching chick flicks. I could tell my mom was trying not to cry. She'd lost a lot in the span of a few hours, and although she'd said that they'd been drifting, I knew it still hurt her. I tried to not feel guilty, because she'd said it wasn't my fault, but I couldn't help but feel like she was giving so much up for me.

We all went to bed pretty early (I'd wanted to stay up, but my mom and Rachel kept going on about it being a school night). My mom actually let Rachel sleep in my room with me, but we had to promise that there wouldn't be any funny business of any kind. I was fine with that. I was still paranoid about getting caught after what happened with Rachel's dads.

"Are you sure you're alright?" she asked me as we crawled into bed. "It's okay if you're freaking out about everything a little bit. You did lose your dad...again."

"Honestly? I just feel relieved. I don't have to hide and lie anymore. Everyone knows, and I didn't lose my home, and I sort of feel like I gained a parent more than I lost one."

"I'm glad," Rachel said, spooning me from behind. "I was afraid this might go bad, and you'd hate me."

"I could never hate you, Rach. Besides, if I had been kicked out, it's not like it would be your fault. You didn't make me gay." I giggled a little before saying, "Although, if anyone could make someone a lesbian, it's you."

She laughed. "Oh, and why's that?"

"Your mouth does amazing things," I said with a smirk that I knew she couldn't see, but I knew she knew it was there.

"Quinn Fabray!" she yelled between laughs. "That was entirely inappropriate! What if your mother heard you saying things like that?"

"She's in bed," I said. "Besides, everyone should be aware of your...talents."

"You're really channeling Puckerman right now, you know," she said. "I guess that's better than the crying mess that I expected you to be at the end of today. I'm really proud of you, Quinn."

"I never would've gotten through that without you," I said, twisting around to give her a peck on the cheek. "I love you, and I would've loved you even if both my parents spat in my face and physically threw me out the door, okay?"

She kissed the back of my neck. "I love you, too, Quinn. Now, go to sleep. We have school in the morning."

I smiled and in a few minutes, I was fast asleep.

* * *

A/N 2: I really hope this chapter was alright. I've sort of had it in the back of my mind the entire time I was writing this, and it's sort of a huge moment for Quinn and Rachel and everything, so I hope I did it justice.


	20. Parents

A/N: I'm going to warn you now that this is a filler chapter. The next chapter will have much more of a bang (and a real bang...not like the lack of bang that we got for Brittana at the end of this season). It would've been this chapter, but I haven't actually sorted out what I want to happen, and I wanted to get something out so I wouldn't lose my focus on this story. That, and it's past 4 in the morning, so...enjoy!

* * *

I woke up the next day not really remembering what had happened the night before. It took me a few minutes for my memory to kick in, but when it did, I couldn't help the smile that broke out across my face. Sure, things were far from perfect, but at least my dad was gone, and my mom was on my side. Plus, she'd let Rachel stay the night.

That's when I realized that Rachel wasn't in bed with me. I sat up in my bed. If Rachel wasn't there...then she hadn't spent the night. I was sure that she had...unless I'd dreamed the whole thing. I started to panic. That wasn't possible...was it? It'd seemed so real. There's no way that my mind would allow events to play out so well...

Just when I was about to jump out of my bed and start searching for Rachel, she walked into the room with two mugs in her hands. I sighed in relief and felt the smile come back to my face.

"Hey," she said. "I hope I didn't wake you. I wanted to let you sleep in a little, seeing as you don't have Cheerios." She sat down next to me and handed me a cup. "I made you some tea."

"Thanks," I said, taking a sip. "And no, you didn't wake me up."

"I was hoping to be back before you got up. I didn't want you to think I'd left you or anything."

"I actually thought I'd dreamed everything about yesterday for a minute," I said with a little laugh.

She shook her head. "Nope, that was all real. Did I mention I was proud of you?"

"About a hundred times," I said. "And I'll say it again. I wouldn't be half as brave without you."

"You sell yourself short," she said, getting up. "Well, if you don't mind, could I borrow some of your clothes? I didn't think to bring any of mine."

"People are gonna get the wrong idea," I said with a smirk.

She shrugged. "I don't really care." Her face got serious after that. "Speaking of everyone at school...what're we going to do about that?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean...they don't really have anything on us anymore. We're out to our parents and the school, and we've all dealt with the consequences of that. I think...I think we should start reporting some of the things that have been going on. We should at least let it be known that we can't be blackmailed anymore."

I nodded. "Sure, but I don't know about reporting stuff. Figgins never does anything anyway, and Sue will do anything in her power to make sure that she doesn't lose anymore Cheerios before competition. As unfortunate as it is, she does have a lot of connections, especially on the school board."

Rachel slumped a little. "Then what should we do?"

"We could always let Santana loose on them."

Rachel shook her head. "Trust me, we do that, and we'll have murder charges to worry about."

I laughed a little. "Look, we'll just play it by ear like we always do."

"Because that always goes so well," she said with a smirk, and I playfully punched her in the arm. A second later, there was a knock on the door.

"Yeah?" I called out.

"Girls, when you're all ready for school, I'd like to have a word before you go," my mom said from the other side of the door.

"Okay, we'll be down in a bit," I said back to her. "Wonder what that's about."

"I'm sure she just wants to discuss the nature of our relationship, just like my parents did," Rachel said to me.

"Oh, joy," I said, getting out of bed and getting ready for school. It felt a little weird having to pick out clothes again. It felt like the pregnancy all over again, except this time I didn't feel scared and alone. Well, I didn't feel alone. This was all still very scary, but it was easier with Rachel. When we were both finally ready (it took me a while to find anything that fit Rachel. We finally settled on a pair of shorts with a belt and a shirt that I hadn't worn since eighth grade), we went downstairs. My mom had made breakfast.

"Hello, girls!" she said, a little over excited. "I made food. There's bacon and eggs and pancakes."

"Well, thank you, Mrs. Fabray," Rachel said. "This was very thoughtful of you. Unfortunately, I'm vegan, so I can't really eat anything, but thank you-"

"Oh my gosh!" my mom said, startling us both a little. "I can't believe I forgot. I'm sure I can whip you up a salad."

"That's fine," Rachel said.

"Well, you need to eat. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day." She started looking through our cupboard. "We have...ah! We have granola bars! Do you like those?"

"That'll be fine," Rachel said with a smile as my mom handed her three. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," my mom said, and we dropped into silence as we ate. It was getting to me, seeing my mom look at us like she wanted to say something, but she didn't know how to start.

"Did you say you wanted to talk?" I finally said when I couldn't take the tension anymore.

"Well...yes. First and foremost, I wanted to apologize to both of you. What Russel said was completely out of line, and I'm sorry that you both had to be so afraid of telling us the truth."

"It's not your fault, Mom," I said.

She smiled. "I'm glad you aren't blaming me, but it is partially my fault. I thought we needed him back in our lives. I should've known better after everything that happened last year." I just nodded, and she went on. "Now I have a few questions for the two of you. How serious are the two of you about each other?"

"Well, I don't want to speak for Quinn, but I know that I love your daughter, and although I know the chances of high school romance lasting are slim to none, I think that Quinn and I have seen each other at our absolute best and worst. I can't imagine myself with anyone else."

I smiled at her. Seriously, it's like she went out of her way to remind me how lucky I was to have her.

"Same," I finally said. "This is the real deal."

"Well, I'm happy for you two, and I pray that you keep making each other this happy," my mom said. "Exactly how long has this been going on?"

I shrugged. "It's hard to say when this all started. Officially, it hasn't been very long, but there's been feelings for months...years, even."

"Years on my part," Rachel said.

"I think on my part, too," I said, and Rachel turned to me with wide eyes. "Like I said, I don't really know when this started. I mean, there has to be a reason that I kissed back in the choir room that day." Rachel smiled a little bit and grabbed my hand.

"Okay," my mom said. "There's just one more question I have to ask you." I looked at her, and she looked extremely uncomfortable. "So...you two are very close?"

"Um...yes?" I said. "Was that it?"

"No...I...what I mean is...are you two...sexually active?"

I choked on some spit, and Rachel let a few incoherent noises leave her mouth.

"Mom!" I yelled when I could finally breathe again.

"What? I...I just think that it's something that we need to talk about."

"You couldn't have asked me this without my girlfriend sitting here?" I said.

"Well, I figured that it would be better this way."

"How is this better!" I yelled out.

"Quinn, just calm down," Rachel finally said. "I think your mother just wanted to talk to both of us because this concerns both of us."

My mom nodded, then we dropped back into silence. She was looking at me, Rachel was looking at me, and I was looking at the floor.

"Well," my mom finally said. "Are you?" I looked at her, then at Rachel, then slowly nodded. My mom's eyes went wide. "Oh...okay. I...I thought I was prepared for this."

"Mom-"

"No, it's okay. I'm fine." She was pacing back and forth. "Well, were the two of you safe?"

"Um, well, Quinn was my first, so I know I didn't give her anything, and I know that she's only slept with Puck, and she had to constantly get tested through the pregnancy, so she couldn't give me anything...and we can't get pregnant, so-"

"Okay," my mom cut her off. "That's...that's good. I suppose there isn't much risk. Just make sure to...keep everything clean. Wash your hands-"

"Please stop talking," I said, hands over my face. "For the love of all things holy, please just stop talking."

"I'm sorry," my mom said. "I don't...I don't know how to do this. Just...just keep the doors open from now on, okay? And promise me you won't do anything while I'm here."

"Trust me, I don't wanna do anything while you're here," I said. "I'm pretty sure I don't wanna have sex ever, ever again."

"I'm sorry to cut this conversation short, but Quinn and I really need to get to school," Rachel said. My mom just nodded as we practically sprinted out the door. School that day was a bit of a blur. The Cheerios didn't really say much of anything to us. Sue had probably tortured them to near death that morning, and Stephanie was nowhere to be seen. I'd never been happier to not be on the team. Santana and Brittany had ditched all together. Brittany had texted me that Santana was feeling pretty down about her parents, so they'd stayed home to eat ice cream and have sex (I was having the most awkward day of my life). Because they were gone, and Sam and Mike were out sick, Mr. Schue canceled glee, and Rachel and I decided to go to her house.

"So when do you think this'll all come to a head?" Rachel asked me as we sat down in her living room.

"Probably when Stephanie comes back," I said with a groan.

"Well, at least you can really tell her off the next time," Rachel said, cuddling into my side. We sat like that for a while, then Rachel went up to her room to get some books so she could do her homework.

Of course, as soon as she left, David Berry walked into the house. I thought about getting up and walking up to Rachel's room before he noticed me, but he caught me out of the corner of his eye.

"Hello, Quinn," he said.

"Hello, Mr. Berry," I said, standing up. "I was just on my way up to Rachel's room, so-"

"Actually, I have a few things I'd like to say to you," he said, and I sat back down. He sat down across from me, and I couldn't help but be reminded of the last time we'd really talked...after he'd caught me in bed with his baby girl. The only difference was that I didn't have Michael or Rachel as a buffer. What the hell was taking her so long, anyway?

"Um...what did you want to talk about, sir?" I really understood how Finn felt when he met my dad. This was terrifying.

"Let me just start of by saying that I don't trust you," he said, and my heart sunk. "You have no idea what it was like to see Rachel come home every day looking heartbroken because of something you'd done. There were a few times we'd wanted to transfer her to another school, but she'd wanted to stay. That was your fault."

"I know," I said, hanging my head. "I'm truly sorry for everything I've done, and even though I can't make it up to her, I try."

"Yes you do," he said under his breath. "Look, I'm not crazy about my daughter dating you. You're the type of bully that made my school years a living hell, and I don't want that for Rachel."

"I'll never bully her like that again," I said. "I think...I think I saw something in her that made me realize things that I didn't want to about myself. Now that I've dealt with that, I'm not so angry."

David nodded. "As much as I hate it, she loves. No matter how miserable you used to make her, you make her even more happy now. All I'm asking of you is to not hurt her. She thinks the world of you, Quinn, and if you were to ever cheat on her or revert to your old ways, it would cut deep."

"I know," I said. "And I won't. Cheat or revert. I practically worship the ground she walks on at this point, Mr. Berry."

"Good," he said. "Because if you hurt my baby, I'm not afraid to-"

"Quinn, I found my book!" Rachel yelled running down the stairs. When she saw the two of us sitting in the living room, she calmed a bit. "Daddy...what are you doing."

"Nothing, Rach," he said. "Quinn and I are just having a little chat." He looked at me to back him up, and I nodded in a hurry. Rachel looked unimpressed.

"Daddy, I told you not to try to scare her off."

David threw his hands in the air. "Alright! I give up!" he said with a smile. "I'll leave you girls down here to do your work. Quinn, if you'd like, you're more than welcome to stay for dinner."

I nodded. "That would be nice. Thank you, Mr. Berry."

"David's fine," he said, walking up the stairs. Rachel sat down next to me.

"What was that all about?" she asked.

"I think...I think that was your dad's weird way of giving me his blessing or something," I said, still staring up the stairs where he had been.

Rachel smiled. "I knew he'd warm up to you eventually. Everyone assumes my dad is the scary one, but Daddy is actually much harder to win over."

"I've come to realize that," I said. "Do you think he'll ever actually, y'know, like me?"

"He probably already does," she said. "He won't be friendly for a while longer, though." I groaned, and she just smiled a little more. "Okay, so math..."

Rachel and I spent the rest of the afternoon working on homework and watching TV. I wanted to believe that this was the end...that this was our happily ever after, but until we really dealt with Stephanie and Karofsky and everyone else at school, it couldn't be over.


	21. Enough

A/N: Thank you all so much for your patience. My computer completely crapped out on me. I'm using my girlfriend's to get this out. I really appreciate if you're still reading after my rather long and unannounced hiatus. I hope you like this, and I think the next chapter will the last. Please keep with the R&R and I really apologize for the wait.

* * *

The following Monday at school was a lot less calm. It didn't start out so badly. I picked up Rachel like I did every day.

"Hey," she said, leaning over and giving me a kiss. "We picking up Brittany and Santana today?"

"No. All they do is make out in the backseat. I can't take it to day."

"Try to tell me you wouldn't try the same if it were Santana or Brittany driving."

"That's not the point," I said with a laugh. "I missed you, by the way."

"We just saw each other yesterday."

"So?" I said. "That doesn't mean I can't miss you."

"You're sappy."

"You love it," I said. "By the way, did you get Santana's text about not having to worry about Karofsky anymore?"

Rachel nodded. "I wonder what she's got on him."

"I don't know, but I'm sure whatever it is, it's good," I said. "Santana's very perceptive when she's trying to get dirt. That's how she found out about us in the first place."

"I'm really glad that Santana and I are friends,considering how cunning she can be when you get on her bad side...which I found myself on a lot for our first two years of high school...and the first half of this year."

"Yeah, well, until she and Brittany officially got together, it wasn't much better being her friend," I said. We pulled into the school parking lot, and Santana and Brittany were already there...making out next to the car.

"Could the two of you maybe separate from each other for five minutes," I said. "It's not like the bullying has totally stopped."

"Yeah, but now, I don't really care. Nothing happened last week, and the next time Stephanie and the Cheerios or Azimio want to mess with me, I can do whatever I want." We all started walking towards the school.

"Try not to fight, Santana," Brittany said. "You know I don't like it."

"I'm not saying fight. I'm just saying that we can at least stand up for ourselves. Everything's out in the open now, and Karofsky's on our side if he knows what's good for him."

"Speaking of that," I said. "What exactly is it that you know?"

"I can't really-" Santana started, but Brittany cut her off.

"He's gay." Santana glared at her. "Oh. I wasn't supposed to tell anybody."

"Are you serious?" Rachel asked, and Santana and Brittany nodded. "That's crazy! I mean, when I think about everything he did to Kurt and to us, it makes sense. It's actually quite common for gay teens to be very homophobic before they're able to come to terms with themselves."

"So many words," Brittany said, almost going cross-eyed. Santana just laughed, and we all walked into school. The school day was looking like it was going to be calm like the end of the week before had been. I was relieved.

Until lunch...when all the Cheerios decided to corner me in the hallway on my way to eat.

"Oh, Christ," I said. "What now?"

"This is all your fault!" Stephanie yelled, shoving me. I pushed her back.

"What're you talking about?"

"We finished last at qualifiers on Saturday, Fabray. Coach spent all of this morning torturing us, and it's all your fault."

I laughed. "How could it be my fault? You always said the team would be better off without me around. Are you admitting that Santana, Brittany, and I were the only reasons Sue still had a winning team? Do you finally realize how useless you really are?"

"I wouldn't mouth off if I were you," Stephanie said. "If you didn't notice, you're sort of surrounded."

"Are you gonna have the whole team jump me or something?"

"You put my scholarship in jeopardy," Stephanie said. "Apparently, three championships weren't enough for any of the schools I wanted to go to. It'll only be saved if Sue manages to blackmail enough people into placing us into another qualifying round."

"Your point?" I spat out. "It's not like your dad can't pay your way in." I couldn't help but feel a little guilty, though. I may not have cared about Stephanie and her future (in fact, it gave me a little satisfaction knowing that she'd have to deal with the bills for school on her own), but I knew there were other kids on the squad that may have had money pulled from them, too.

"The point, Quinn, is that you've totally screwed over the social rule in this school, and the only way to make sure it goes back to normal is to make sure you get punished." She got a creepy smile on her face. "Can't have people thinking they can mess with the Cheerios whenever they want, can we?"

Okay, I was starting to feel a little nervous. A little more than a little nervous. Sure, the whole team wasn't around me, but there were at least ten girls surrounding me. Even though I'd handled myself alright in the last few fights I'd been in with Stephanie, the odds were not in my favor on this one...at all.

"You aren't seriously going to do this, are you?" I asked, trying to get the waver out of my voice. "You could get suspended."

Stephanie laughed. "This is how this is going down. You'll get roughed up, you'll accuse us, you won't have any proof, and Figgins will do what he always does; absolutely nothing. I mean, look at what happened with Kurt Hummel. The only one that did anything about that was Coach Sue, and I don't think she'll be on your side on this one, do you?"

I had to keep my hands from shaking. They couldn't really do this. I wanted to believe they wouldn't really do this, but the more I thought about what she said, the more I realized she was right. Figgins wouldn't do anything anything about this...maybe if there was a medical bill..."

"Hey!" I heard a voice from down the hall call. "What's going on?"

I'd never been happier to hear Finn Hudson's voice in my life.

"Hey, Finn," Stephanie said in a sugary sweet voice. "We were just talking about Cheerios stuff. Don't worry about it."

"Um...okay," he said, and he looked like he was about to walk away, but then he turned away. "Oh, yeah...I needed Quinn for a minute."

Stephanie didn't look happy. "What? Why?"

"We're doing a duet in glee, and we have to practice," he said. I looked at him confused, and he just threw me a wink. What...was he saving me?

"Why are you singing with _her? _Don't' you hate each other?"

Finn shrugged. "It was a drawing names deal. I got the short stick. Come on, Quinn. Let's get this over with." It took everything in me to walk over to him calmly. We both walked over to the choir room in silence.

"Okay," he finally said. "What the hell was that?"

"I'm pretty sure they were about to jump me," I said, and his eyes went wide. "What do you care? Like she said, we hate each other."

"Quinn, just because I don't like you right now doesn't mean that I'm gonna let a bunch of girls beat you up. I'm pissed; I'm not evil."

"Well...thanks," I said. "I really appreciate it." We dropped into an awkward silence before he spoke up again.

"Look, I still love Rachel. Like, a lot."

"I know," I said. "It doesn't change the fact that she's with me. I love her, too."

"I know," he said back to me. "I don't get it. You guys acted like you hated each other, and now out of nowhere you're dating. Can't you see how that sucks for me?"

I nodded. "It doesn't mean you can just walk up to Rachel and kiss her whenever you want just because this sucks for you. I'm not dating her to hurt you. Honestly, I could care less about you when it comes to Rachel."

"I get that. I just...I wanna say I'm sorry for that day in the choir room...and the time I threatened to tell your dad about everything...and all the other times I was a jerk. Just know that even though I don't like you with Rachel, I do have your back."

"Thanks," I said. "Is part of this deal that you're backing off of her, too?"

He sighed. "She's your girlfriend...so yeah...I guess."

I gave him a pat on the shoulder. "Thank you. Again." He laughed a little bit. "Now, would you mind walking me to cafeteria? I'm actually really hungry, and I'm not interested in dealing with Stephanie alone right now."

"No problem," he said with a smile. It felt like we had something of a truce going on, and it was nice. As much as I'd hated Finn for the last few weeks, he was still a big part of my life, and I did care about him in a weird way.

When we got to the cafeteria, Rachel, Santana, and Brittany were already eating. I smiled when I saw Rachel had gotten me a tray already. Finn and I parted with a more than awkward hug, and I sat down.

"Where were you?" Rachel asked.

"And what the hell was that with Finn?" Santana asked almost before Rachel had even finished talking.

"Nothing. We talked a little bit, and he walked me here."

"You didn't threaten him or anything, did you?" Rachel asked, and I shook my head. "Okay, what aren't you telling me?"

I sighed. "Well...Stephanie and a few Cheerios sort of cornered me in the hallway, and Finn helped me out."

"What do you mean cornered you?" Santana asked.

"It wasn't that big of a deal."

"It was that big of a deal if you won't give me a straight answer." I hated Santana sometimes. I didn't want Rachel to worry, and honestly, I was trying not to worry about it myself.

"They didn't do anything," I finally said.

"What, because Finn got there before they had a chance?" Rachel asked. I sighed, then nodded. "Okay, that's it. We can't just let this slide anymore."

"No fighting," Brittany said, putting an arm around Santana."

Rachel shook her head. "No, no fighting, Brittany."

"Then what?" I said. "Report it so we can piss everyone off even more than we already have? We're sort of stuck."

"There's no way Figgins wouldn't do anything if our parents got involved," Rachel said. "Besides, we all know that my dads have a very strong connection to the local branch of the ACLU-"

"I'm gonna stop you right there," Santana said. "As much as I hate it, Rachel's right. If they were really planning on kicking your ass like that, we have to tell someone. I mean, we could just cut some bitches, but my girlfriend won't let me." Brittany smacked Santana's arm. "Seriously, Q, I'm done with the phrase 'We're stuck' from this moment on, even if we have to tattle to our parents. Well...more your parents then mine, but you get my point."

"Your parents still haven't talked to you at all?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Whatever. I don't care. It's their loss." It was pretty obvious she didn't mean anything coming out of her mouth.

"It's not your fault, Santana," Brittany said. "You know that."

"I do," she said. "I just miss them...especially my dad."

"Aw, Lopez has daddy issues. Maybe that's why she's gay."

God, I hated Stephanie.

Santana was out of her seat before anyone could stop her.

"Oh, I am so ready to punch your face in," Santana said, getting in Stephanie's face. Everyone in the cafeteria was looking at us...once again.

"Your threats of violence are getting boring," Stephanie said with a wave of her hand.

"Just leave," Rachel said.

"Oh, look. The tranny has some mildly attractive friends, so it thinks it can talk to me."

"Fine," Rachel said. "We'll leave. I really don't feel like wasting my lunch on a mouth-breather like you when I could be spending my time on more beneficial endeavors."

"Whatever. I'm not so interested in you," Stephanie said with a shrug. "I'm more interested in the three lesboteers."

"Lesboteers? Do you even hear yourself talk?" Santana asked.

"I just wanna warn the three of you that this isn't over." Stephanie looked at me. "Just because Hudson saved you doesn't mean that we're not planning to do the same later."

I got in her face. "Try that again, and I'll-"

"And you'll what? Drop like a sack of potatoes?" Stephanie and the other Cheerios laughed. "You're feeling really brave because we're in front of all these people, but as soon as the bell rings, and everyone clears out, you're mine." Stephanie shoved me back, and Brittany caught me. Unfortunately, with Brittany's hands full, she wasn't able to stop Santana lunging like a bat out of hell.

Everything after that felt like déjà vu...considering that it was almost the same as the fight at Cheerios practice. Difference this time was that Rachel pulled me away from the middle of it all, and Brittany was pretty quick to do the same with Santana (even though it was a lot more difficult. Santana was pretty hellbent on giving Stephanie a beat down she wouldn't forget). The entire cafeteria just devolved into a food fight. It took about half an hour to get everyone to calm down. We all got sent to our classes, but I knew that I'd be called in to the office. It happened about halfway through my last class for the day.

"Quinn Fabray?" I looked up, and there was an office attendant by my classroom door. I got up and followed her out of the room. I was dreading this, but fortunately, since I hadn't really been a part of the fight this time, I was hoping to get out without any trouble. I was expecting another "Don't let it happen again" speech, and a few more vague threats, and I'd be out before my class even ended.

What I hadn't been expecting was a room full of parents.

"Mom?" I said, walking into the room. She wasn't the only one. Rachel's dads and Brittany's parents, as well as a couple I didn't recognize were there. Rachel, Brittany, and Santana were there, too. Unfortunately, so was Stephanie. "What's going on?"

"Well, when the food fight started, Rachel called me and told me what was going on."

"That was after I called my dads," Rachel said. "I advised Brittany to follow suit and call her parents, and since they were all available, they all came in. Principal Figgins called Stephanie's parents."

"Yes, he did," the man I assumed was Stephanie's dad said. "Now do you mind telling me what exactly is going on?"

"Ms. Berry and the others claim that your daughter has been bullying and threatening them for several weeks-"

"Did you know about this?" David said, an edge in his voice. I had to admit that it was nice to not have it directed at me. "I mean, you must have. It's your school."

"I did, but I was unable to do anything about it, because the girls wouldn't allow me to contact you, and there was no proof-"

"The girls wouldn't allow you?" Brittany's mom said. "So you take orders from your students? You let your students get harassed without notifying their guardians?"

"What exactly has been happening?" my mom asked.

"Mostly, she just calls us dykes and stuff, but she's started a few fights-" I got cut off before I could finish.

"You started the fight at Cheerios, and Lopez has started every fight since then!" Stephanie yelled.

"You shoved Quinn today!" Santana yelled back. "I was just defending my friend."

"It seems to me that she must be the real troublemaker," Stephanie's dad said. "Considering that she's the only one that doesn't have her parents here. Then again, it doesn't look like any of you could raise children properly." That just sent the room into a shouting match that finally Principal Figgins was able to quiet down.

"Now, I know that you are all very upset because you've had to come down here, but I'd like to resolve this in the quickest, most fair way possible. You will all be sent to detention, and Ms. Lopez will be suspended for the rest of the week, because this isn't her first offense."

"Okay," Stephanie said with a smile.

"That sounds fair," her mom said. "Now, if you'll excuse us-"

"Are you serious!" Santana yelled. "Stephanie wrote dyke across my locker, and nothing happens to her, but I push her to the ground, and I get suspended?"

Everyone was talking over each other yet again until Michael Berry finally spoke up.

"Enough!" he yelled, and immediately, all eyes were on him. "I think that it's pretty clear what's been going on here. My daughter has been coming home with slushie stains on her shirts for years. She's been egged on school property-"

"Those were not our students," Figgins chimed in.

"Regardless, there have been many things done to my daughter and her friends that you seem to ignore."

"Mr. Berry, I can't do anything unless someone reports it to me."

"That's bullshit, and everyone in this room knows it!" Michael yelled. "You haven't been doing your job, and frankly, I don't see how you still have it. Now, while I understand that in your job, it's sometimes difficult to cut through all the he said, she said and get to the truth, I can tell you that if you tried even a little bit to figure out what's been going on, I'm sure you'd find that Stephanie has been horribly bullying these girls."

"But-"

"I don't want excuses. I want action, and if I don't get it, I'm not afraid to sue this school for everything it's worth. You'd lose your job, and I'm pretty sure you'd be hard pressed to find another one. Now, I suggest you start with the entire cafeteria of witnesses you had to the fight today, including the lunch ladies who would be more likely to be impartial about the whole thing."

"Another suggestion?" Brittany said. "Sue has cameras everywhere in the cafeteria. She uses them to make sure the Cheerios don't go off their diets. Maybe you should check those."

"Sue wouldn't allow me to check those tapes."

"Who exactly is in charge around here?" my mom said. "And to second what Michael said earlier, how have you not been fired?"

"I...I'll check the tapes and hand out punishments once an investigation has taken place. In the meantime, your girls will be watched to ensure their safety."

"Now hold on just a second," Stephanie's dad said. "You can't completely change your mind just because you got threatened."

"I'm sorry, but Mr. Berry is right. The only way to be fair about this is to look at it from all sides." I knew he didn't care about being fair. He just didn't wanna lose his job, but it was working in my favor for once, so I wasn't about to argue. "My decision is final. Now, all of you go home for the rest of the day."

Stephanie's dad looked like he was about to put up a fight, but Michael leveled him with a glare, and he just stormed out, throwing a, "You'll be hearing from me" over his shoulder. Stephanie and her mom followed close behind. We all left Figgins' office soon after that.

"Well, that was unnecessarily dramatic," Michael said. "Why didn't you girls tell us what was going on?"

"It's really complicated," Rachel said.

"Mostly, Britt and Rachel were trying to keep me and Q in the closet," Santana said with a shrug. "They were just being good friends."

"Well, next time, just tell us what's going on," Brittany's mom said. "We don't want you girls getting hurt."

"And just so you know, girls, you're welcome to come over to the house today to just hang out and relax, as long as it's alright with your parents," my mom said.

"That should be fine," Brittany's mom said. "Just as long as you two are home early. You know how Lord Tubbington gets lonely." Santana laughed, and Brittany nodded.

"Yeah, as long as you get all your homework done, it's okay with us," David said, then he gave Rachel and me a hug...which was weird.

"Alright, drive yourselves to the house," my mom said. "I'll have some snacks set out when you get there." All the parents left with a few more hugs and kisses.

"We'll meet you guys there," Santana said, dragging brittany off in the direction of the parking lot.

"How much do you wanna bet that they just ran off to have a quickie?" Rachel asked me.

"I'd rather not think about it," I said with a laugh. "So, you think things will actually change around here?"

Rachel nodded. "You heard my dads. No change, and they sue the school. Something has to change, or at the very least, he's losing funding. More likely, he'll lose his job. Santana still needs to be careful, though. She's already been sent home early."

I shrugged. "Yeah, well, she's always been alright at taking care of herself, and you know that we'll look out for her. In the meantime...why don't we try sneaking a quickie of our own?" I winked, and Rachel laughed.

"And you call me a horndog," she said, as we started walking out to my car. "Of course, there's always after Santana and Brittany leave."

"My mom will still be home," I said with a smirk. "And this is why you're the horndog." Rachel just laughed some more, and we walked out of the school, feeling a little lighter than we had walking in.


	22. Finale

A/N: It took me such a long time to write this for two reasons: 1.) I couldn't think of anything that I thought was fitting and 2.) I sort of didn't want it to end. Still, I knew it had to, so I wrote this for you all. I hope you've enjoyed this story, and I hope you like this very fluffy final chapter (seriously, I'm pretty sure this chapter makes pillows look like bricks). I want to thank you all for your constant feedback and your words of support. Enjoy :)

* * *

"Does my dress look okay? I think it looked better in the store. What do you think?"

I sighed and smiled. This was about the millionth time I'd had to answer this question. It was our graduation, and Rachel was acting like she was accepting a Nobel Peace Prize...or a Tony.

"It's amazing. You couldn't have picked a better dress if you tried," I said from her bed.

"Should I take off the earrings? Are they too much?"

"They're just right," I said. "Plus they match the dress. Stop freaking out."

"And my robe? Is it alright?" she asked, and I wanted to laugh. I should've known this would happen. Rachel was always a little (or very, if I'm being honest) high strung. "I feel like it might be too big. I tried to get a smaller size, but they told me that this was the smallest size they offered. I find that hard to believe, though. I'm quite petite, but I know there are girls that are smaller than me. I would've payed for a special order, but they said they didn't do that. I feel like I'm drowning in this robe. It's too big, isn't it?"

"It's fine, Rachel. It's just fine," I said.

She stopped looking in her mirror and turned to me, a look of horror on her face.

"It's just fine?" she said, and I could hear the panic in her voice. "It can't be just fine, Quinn! This is one of the most important moments of our lives, and yes, I plan on walking across much bigger and more important stages, but this is one of those moments that we'll remember for the rest of our lives. I can't simply look fine. If I get famous, and there are pictures of my graduation circulating where I just look fine, I'll be a laughing stock! Things like that can ruin careers-"

I got off of her bed and grabbed her by the shoulders. "Rachel, you look perfect. No one has ever looked this good in a graduation gown in the history of the world."

"You don't have to be sarcastic, Quinn," she said with a pout. "You can tell me the truth."

"I'm not being sarcastic," I said, laughing. "You look stunning. Your hair, your make-up, your shoes, and anything else you can think of that you don't think looks good on you is, in fact, fabulous. Just relax."

"How can I relax? I was supposed to be valedictorian, and then some nobody transfer student swooped in and stole my thunder-"

"Okay, first of all, you weren't at the top of the class before the new kid got here," I said with a smirk. "Second of all, that just means you don't have to make a speech. Besides, it didn't stop you from getting into the school you wanted, so I don't see why you're still freaking out."

Rachel had gotten into the New York Academy of Dramatic Arts, which she'd been obsessed with since she'd found out about its existence (I still didn't understand how she didn't know about it before senior year, but she was so qualified it didn't really matter), and after a lot of debate, I was going to NYU. It had been between NYU and Yale for a long time. Rachel had wanted me to go to Yale, because she was afraid of holding me back, but I told her a thousand times that I wanted to be in New York for more reasons than just her (it was mostly her, but there really were other reasons), and I finally decided on NYU. It was just the right thing for me. My mom agreed, and that settled it.

"Not making a speech is not calming me down, Quinn. It just means that I'll have less practice for the future when it really counts." I didn't know why she was freaking out so badly, but I was determined to find out.

"Okay, what is this really about?" I asked. She shrugged, and I rolled my eyes. "Come on, Rachel. I know this isn't just about nerves. You've been dying to graduate and take New York by storm. You've been waiting for this moment since you were born."

"That's the problem!" she said. "I've been waiting for this, and expecting things to be a certain way, and everything is different than I thought it would be, and while not everything that was unexpected was bad," she shot me a smile, and I smiled back, "it's still alarming. I mean, what if nothing comes of all my dreams? What if I end up old and bitter in New York, working as a singing waitress because it's the only job I could get."

"You worry too much," I said. "It's sad when I'm the sane one in a relationship."

Rachel sighed, and I kissed her on the forehead. "All I've been doing my entire childhood is looking forward to the future...and now, here it is, and I don't know if I'm ready."

"No one's ready for everything, Rachel. You just have to learn how to roll with the punches."

"I don't do that," she said, and I laughed.

"I'm pretty sure that's what we did all of junior year. Or have you already forgotten the nightmare that was Stephanie Getson?"

Rachel groaned, and I almost joined in with her. Stephanie's parents had tried to push Figgins into punishing us for a while, but when he wouldn't budge (mostly because the parent count was 5-2 in our favor), they'd backed off. Stephanie basically stayed out of our hair for the rest of the year after realizing that she didn't have the odds on her side anymore. She'd gone off to college in Cleveland, but she came back to town about six months after she left. Last I'd heard, she was engaged and pregnant (not in that order), on the narrow path to Lima Loserdom.

It was weird to think that almost happened to me.

"I suppose that's true," she finally said, and I smiled.

"Look at it this way: if you end up not becoming the huge start that I know you'll be, at least you won't be bitter in New York alone."

"Haha, very funny," she said. "You know, I was just starting to feel better."

I shook my head. "Trust me, you'll do great in the big city. You were made for it, and you beat out a hell of a lot of people for your spot at NYADA. You have nothing to worry about."

She nodded, then turned back to the mirror. "But are you sure my dress is okay?"

Graduation was...boring. We didn't have a very large graduating class, so it wasn't very long, and for that, I was grateful, but there were only a few people that I cared about seeing walk across that stage. Rachel was the first, and I about lost my voice screaming for her. Then, it was me, and I could hear Rachel and my mom over everyone else. I made sure to wave to my mom as I went back to my seat, and I could see her crying. We'd gotten so close since my dad left that she was actually making it really hard to leave my home.

And that's what it was now...a home.

Next was Santana, and I laughed when I saw Brittany run up to her as soon as she got off stage, even though teachers had told her a thousand times that she wasn't allowed to leave her seat until her row was called. Brittany was last, and if I'd had any voice left, it was gone now. Brittany had been a challenge; she'd been so far behind in her classes that it almost seemed impossible that she would graduate with the rest of us. The teachers at McKinley were incompetent and unwilling to help someone who learned things differently. Still, she buckled down, and with the help of the entire glee club, she'd turned in all her papers and made everything up that she needed to cover. Santana was sobbing from her seat, and I couldn't help but laugh as I felt a few tears slip out of my eyes, too.

The moment we all lost it, though, was our last number together as a glee club. It was, of course, Don't Stop Believing. How could it be anything else? It was our anthem...our song. That song was a part of this club before I was a part of this club. I knew that everything I was singing sounded awful, but when I looked over, Santana wasn't even singing; Brittany was just holding her while she choked out a few lyrics. Even Rachel's voice cracked a few times, and if that happened, then I didn't feel so bad for singing so out of key that you could barely believe I'd been in this choir for three years. It was funny to look at all of us now, crying like babies, and think that we'd actually won a national championship a few weeks before this.

"I can't believe it's actually over," Santana said as we were all gathered together after the ceremony. "It's...surreal. I mean, not the classes, because I don't care about those, but the people." She kept looking around the crowd, and I knew what she was doing. She still hadn't heard from her parents outside of a really awkward encounter at the grocery store, but she'd sent them an invitation to graduation. "People you may never see again once you skip town."

"They didn't show?" I mouthed to her, and she just shrugged. I smiled at her, and she smiled back at me, but I could tell she wasn't totally behind it. That is, until Brittany wrapped her arms around Santana from behind. Then her smile was real. God, those two were one of those sickeningly sweet couples that you really should hate because of excessive PDA, but they just put a smile on your face. Then again, that might've just been me.

"I just can't believe we won't be in glee club anymore," Brittany said. "We were a family. A weird, insectual family-"

"Incestuous, Britt," Santana said with a laugh and a kiss on Brittany's cheek. "And really, we still are."

"Aw, Santana," Rachel said. "You can be so cute when you want to be."

Santana rolled her eyes. "Bite me, Dwarf."

"But don't really," Brittany said. "Only I can bite her."

I just shook my head. The things that came out of Brittany and Santana's mouths were so often overshares that I was starting to become immune to it.

"Is it weird that we spent so much time trying to get out of here, and now I'm starting to miss it already?" Rachel asked, and I just shrugged.

"I feel the same way, so I don't think so."

"I think I'm still a bit in shock, though," she said. "The future is here, you know? We're adults now. We're going to have whole new lives with new people that we don't know yet. It's weird to think that people I've grown so close to and people that made my life a living hell...I may not even remember in a few years time."

"It's probably better that way for the ones you don't like...like Jewfro." I still hadn't forgiven him for outing me...and all the other extremely creepy things that he'd done over the years.

She shook her head. "I feel like I want to remember everything. As much as I hate it, every slushie in my face and every mean name I was called made me who I am. If it weren't for that, I probably wouldn't be as strong. I never would've had the guts to kiss you in the choir room that day-"

"I never really did apologize for molesting you and then running away that day, so I'm sorry," I said, looking at the ground. I actually had apologized several times, but I still felt it was necessary to say every once in a while. She deserved it.

She rolled her eyes. "My point is that all of my experiences, bad and good, have shaped me into the person that I am today, and I like me."

"That's funny, because I like you, too." I leaned down and kissed her.

"You guys are so cute," I heard a voice say from behind me. It was Sam, and I almost tackled him in a hug. We'd really grown closer over the last year, and when he'd started dating Mercedes, our double dated with Brittany and Santana started becoming triples. When he'd gotten into college in California, I'd been a little bit devastated, but I knew it was what was best for him and his relationship with Mercedes, since she was going to UCLA.

"You have to promise you'll call me at least once a week," I said, squeezing him even tighter. "And when you and Mercedes become one of those super-famous power couples, you have to make me the godmother of your children."

"Um, excuse me," Santana said. "You don't have exclusive rights to Trouty Mouth. Let him share the love."

"Yeah," Sam said. "Besides, I can't really breathe right now." I let go of him with a grin, and he was beaming, too.

"I'm serious. Don't lose touch while you're off in California being a rock star, okay? Remember us little people."

He shook his head. "I would never. You'd hunt me down and kill me if I did. At the very least, you'd hire Santana to do it." We both laughed. "Besides, I'm sure that you'll be hugely famous in whatever you do, and even if you stay under the radar or take a civilian job, Rachel will be all over the place."

I sighed. "I really don't know what I would've done without you around, Sam. With all the drama and the craziness, you were there by my side. You're like a brother to me now."

He groaned. "Man, all the 'dating your twin' jokes from last year just got even creepier."

I hugged him again. "I'm going to miss you so much, you big dork!"

"You won't even have time to miss me with the amount of times I'll text you a day. You'll probably hear more from me than you do now." We let go of each other. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to find my beautiful future wife. I'm sure I'll see you at one of Puck's summer parties."

I nodded and waved as he walked away. As he left, I caught sight of Finn. We just waved at each other and turned our separate ways. Despite the fact that he did protect me from anyone that wanted to start trouble, we still didn't get along. He still had feelings for Rachel, and any time that we had a fight, Finn was all over her trying to get her to leave me. He'd promised me more than once that he would back off, but he never did. He'd even gone as far as buying Rachel a ring and telling her that she was the only good thing in her life.

If she'd had feelings for him before (which I knew she didn't), they were gone after that.

She'd kept trying to be his friend, which I never tried to stop, because I trusted Rachel fully, but he always pushed for more. Eventually, she'd just told him that they couldn't talk if he wasn't going to take the hint.

Despite all his talk about leaving the state and not being a Lima Loser, he was going to school at community college and working at Burt's tire shop. As much as I didn't like the guy (it was bordering on hatred at this point), I did hope that he got out of town. Lima Loser only worked on certain people because they took the loser out and made it work (I'd thought Puck would fall into this category, but he'd decided to move to Seattle, where he hoped the rain would inspire his song writing). I didn't want Finn to get stuck after he tried so hard to get out.

"So what happens now?" Rachel asked me after we'd made the rounds of all our friends.

"Well, I figure we'll head to Puck's party, and-"

"No, Quinn," Rachel said. "What happens now?"

I smiled. "Well, we go to New York, we go to school, and you try to make it while I try to find myself. That's as far as I can tell you for now."

"Well, that, and Brittany and Santana will be there."

I smiled even bigger. Santana was going to be at NYU with me, and Brittany had decided, after much discussion, that school wasn't for her and she was going to try to jump right into the dancing game. Santana had completely supported her from the beginning, but we'd had to warm her parents to the idea. When they thought about it (when we all really thought about it, really), it made the most sense. Brittany just wasn't made for school. Dancing? That, she was made for.

"Brittany and Santana are always going to be around, aren't they?" I said. "No matter how many crazy throwdowns Santana and I had with each other or other people, I just can't get rid of them."

Rachel nodded. "You love it."

"I do," I said, and I leaned in for another kiss. I didn't know what was ahead for us...no one really knows what's coming...but with Rachel, I felt like it would be okay.

And to think, I used to hate Rachel Berry.


End file.
